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11 Reasons Friends Who Grew Up With You Will Stay With You Forever

11 Reasons Friends Who Grew Up With You Will Stay With You Forever

There is something particularly special about the kind of friends you have known forever. There is an exceptional bond that is formed over time, one which creates the kind of relationship that can only come from the a life spent alongside each other. You might have your good and bad patches, you might even fall out with each other from time to time, but just like a brother or a sister you have to admit that friends who grew up together have got something pretty magical. They don’t have to live in the house next door, but there are a lot of reasons why they remain close to your heart.

  1. You trust each other more than anyone, because they are like family.
    As the saying goes, you can’t choose your family but you can choose your friends. The only other people who know you as well as your family are the friends you choose. So in this sense, your lifelong friends become your family.
  1. They know your biggest secrets.
    You’re their number one confidante. And they are yours. Because you trust them like family, and because you have shared so       much life together, they know your heart. And you trust them with it.
  1. You had all your ‘firsts’ together
    Friends who grew up together got to experience so many new things together! Your first day of school, your first date, your first kiss! These are memories that only your lifelong friends share with you. No one else has the same kind of special history as this.
  2. You know what each other needs
    Like family, you don’t just know each other you know what is best for each other. And you want it for each other, no matter what.
  3. You don’t need words to communicate
    When things happen, you don’t need to tell them how you’re feeling. They have known you long enough, and know you well enough, to know what to do in certain situations. When tragedy strikes, somehow you know you don’t need to ask them to come. You know they will be at your door just as soon as they can.
  4. The reasons that you became friends always remain
    You picked each other for a reason. Maybe it’s because they make you laugh until you cry, or maybe it is because they stood up for you when no one else did. Whatever the reason, you’ve got each others backs, and the fundamental reasons you found each other will always be there.
  5. They were there for all the big events growing up and they will be there for all the big events in the future
    They were there when your Grandma died, when you graduated, when your dad remarried. They were there by your side for all those enormous moments of your formative years, and so its extra important that they be there for all the ones that are still yet to happen.
  6. You can share your history together
    One of the greatest joys in life is sitting with an old friend and reminiscing about the ‘good old days’. It’s very special having a friend that you love and trust to help you sift through beautiful memories, and laugh together about moments both good and bad.
  7. They are one of few people in your life you will have this kind of relationship and connection with
    There is a lot to be said for a friendship of this caliber. There is so much history and care and time invested, it is a rare and special gift to have such a thing with another person, and good friends recognize this in each other.
  8. They are a continuous (and trusted) source of learning
    It is not only our similarities that see a deep friendship flourish, but our differences as well. Our long-term friendships will inevitably experience times of change, and it encourages us to learn from each other and support each other during these moments of learning.
  9. They know who you are because they know who you were
    Your pasts can help determine the strength of your future. Having someone to walk through this life with you is golden — having someone who knows your entire journey, is priceless.

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

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