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4 Good Reasons Why Newlyweds Should Move

4 Good Reasons Why Newlyweds Should Move

For newlyweds and those who are engaged, it will be to your advantage to look for your new place together — away from the comforts of either of your parents. Now, understandably, this may not be your first thought. However, it is well worth considering. Moving away from the parents can be a really good thing as you embark on the next phase of your life together.

The keyword here is together. You are about to begin a journey that will have many ups and downs, as you well know. This new chapter in your life’s book will have wonderful untold adventures — new job opportunities, new pets, new friends, maybe even children. Your new journey needs to really focus on your new family — the two of you (or, if either of you already have children, all of you). Not to exclude your parents or your in-laws, but your “family” will now consist of who lives under the roof of your new home. Your extended family, though involved and supportive, is not your immediate family.

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Many newlyweds and couples simply struggle with separation from their extended family. This is especially true if you grew up in the south, where families are so important. However, separation from your family should include distance. This helps in so many ways, but is sometimes easier said than done. Once you rely on either set of your parents for financial assistance, for help with a disagreement, or just get too comfortable with them coming over, it becomes a scene from Everybody Love’s Raymond — and that isn’t pretty!

Boundaries are blurred, privacy is out the door, and the bond between husband and wife is not as tight as it should be. Countless experts will tell you that it is vital for a couple to have that time to really be together.

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Below are a few benefits from moving away from both of your families once you decide to live happily ever after:

1. Your parents will see you as independent.

Once you get married, those ties and bonds to your parents are still very much the same. However, if you put some distance between you, there is something amazing that happens: you begin to “grow up” in their eyes. They begin to see you more as equals instead of someone who really depends on them for everything.

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2. You can begin your new life by making new friends together.

Making friends together is a wonderful chance to really grow as a couple. When you move away from home, you are able to meet new neighbors and people in the community you would not have otherwise had the opportunity to meet. You are really beginning a new life together! This does not mean that you ignore those former relationships, but you are growing your sphere of influence and creating new connections that could benefit you in the future.

3. You can create boundaries for all parties involved.

A couple I knew moved back in with a set of their parents after getting married and this proved very stressful for all involved — for years. The parents knew the couple could not financially stand on their own feet and got used to taking care of their children. This even included telling them when dinner would be served — there was no privacy at all. After the couple moved out, for several years later, the set of parents would show up unannounced at their door! The couple had a struggle getting the parents to see them as adults and not children. They also had problems with how the parents disciplined their children. Having space creates that boundary that is necessary for a new couple to really grow

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4. You will have your own set standard way of doing things.

When you move out and venture into the new world together, you end up creating a set standard way of doing things together, and it may or may not be the way your parents would have done things. Odds are, it isn’t. Coming together as a couple, you will compromise and change. That is a beautiful part of marriage, in my opinion. Once you move out, you won’t want to move back in with your parents — that would mean losing all of the benefits of being independent with your new spouse.

Featured photo credit: Timothy Marsee via flickr.com

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Last Updated on October 15, 2018

Why Am I So Tired? 10 Reasons You’re Extremely Tired And How to Fix It

Why Am I So Tired? 10 Reasons You’re Extremely Tired And How to Fix It

“Why am I so tired?” is a question that people ask themselves pretty frequently. Everyone gets tired at one point or another, particularly after something like an illness, a long night up with a sick child, or a busy week at work. When tiredness is persistent, however — when you feel tired as soon as you wake up in morning or when sleep doesn’t seem to help, no matter how much rest you get— it may often indicate a deeper, underlying problem.

While there are a lot of possible reasons for tiredness, here’re some of the most common causes of fatigue:

1. Dehydration

If you want to boost your energy levels, first check whether you are dehydrated. The human brain is 85% water, and needs to maintain this level in order to perform its essential functions.

If you fail to drink enough water, the brain extracts fluids from your blood to compensate for the deficit. As a result, the oxygen levels in your blood drop, reducing the amount of energising oxygen available to your organs and tissues. Fatigue and sleepiness set in rapidly, leaving you more vulnerable to the 2 pm post-lunch crash that many of us experience.

You cannot cure this crash with caffeine – the only long-term, effective solution is to drink hydrating fluids throughout the day.

2. Lack Of Exercise

A workout will surely leave you feeling even more tired, right? Wrong! As counterintuitive as it may sound, physical activities have an energizing effect. Moving your body releases endorphins, increases your heart rate, and boosts your concentration.

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Try to fit in at least 30 minutes of medium-intensity exercise every day. It’s easiest if you can make this part of our everyday routine, either as soon as you wake up or right after work.

3. A Poor Diet

The food you eat has a direct impact on sleep quality and the amount of rest you get every night. For maximum energy, stick to protein, slow-release carbohydrates, and a moderate amount of healthy (unsaturated) fats. The majority of your food should be plant-based, high in fiber, and low in sugar. These choices will prevent blood sugar fluctuations, which can leave you feeling exhausted.

An easy way to make sure you stick to a good diet is through meal preparation. It’s easy to just get take-out when you’re tired after work, but if you have a meal ready for you in the fridge, you’ll be less tempted by pizza or cheese.

Find out more about healthy meal prep here: 10 Meal Planning Apps You Need To Have To Get Healthier Easily

4. Skipping Breakfast

Physician Dr. Nerina Ramlakhan advises that eating breakfast is key to maintaining a good level of energy throughout the day. When you eat breakfast, you are sending calming signals to the areas of the brain responsible for avoiding danger, along with those that instruct the body to conserve as much energy as possible.

Ingesting food signals to your brain that there is enough food available to ensure our survival. This encourages it to stay relaxed, which in turn, promotes restful sleep.

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Some great ideas for a healthy, filling, and make-ahead breakfasts include overnight oats, smoothies, and freezer-friendly breakfast burritos.

Or if meal-prepping isn’t your think, stock up on easy but healthy breakfast foods like multigrain cereal, yogurt, and fruit: 20 Healthy Breakfast Choices That Will Save You Time

5. Poor Quality Of Sleep

We all know that it’s important to wind down a couple of hours before bed. But did you know that it’s what you do throughout the day that promotes good-quality sleep? It’s not just about the number of hours you sleep, but how restful and deep that sleep is.

TO feel rested, try to regulate your everyday routine to make your sleep deeper and better. Get up at a regular time in the morning to ensure that you get regular sunlight.

Eat nutritious foods in moderate amounts, and make sure you stay hydrated. Go to bed at the same time. And before bedtime, avoid screens that can give off harmful blue light and also keep you stimulated when you need to prepare for a restful night.

Read more about how to develop a routine that will get you better sleep: Poor Sleep Quality Comes from All the Things You Do Since Morning

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6. Sleep Apnea (A Person’s Airways Get Blocked off While They Are Asleep)

Sleep apnea is a common sleep disorder where a person’s airways get blocked off while they are asleep, causing their oxygen levels to drop while they are asleep. This often causes people to stop breathing at night and then to jerk themselves awake (this can happen over 30 times an hour).

Because of this, people with sleep apnea can feel short of breath and have low energy levels. Mouthpieces and other devices to aid in breathing as well as the use of a special breathing machine to keep oxygen levels in a safe zone.

If you feel tired all the time and think you might have sleep apnea, consulting with a doctor is important. Do a sleep study, as this can often reveal if there is an underlying problem causing your tiredness — and once a diagnosis is made, treatment to help you get your energy back begins.

7. Depression

Depression is the most common mental health disorder in the United States (and in many other countries of the world as well). It is marked by persistent feelings of sadness or unhappiness but has physical symptoms, too. Apart from fatigue, people may also experience changes in sleeping and eating habits and difficulty concentrating.

Treatment can often center on anti-depressants, counselling and lifestyle changes like stress management to help manage this condition. You can take a look at these 15 Ways To Overcome Depression And Sadness.

Many people also benefit from activities like yoga and meditation, which help regulate both the body and mind.

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8. Hypothyroidism

If a person has hypothyroidism, their thyroid gland does not produce adequate levels of these important hormones— and the result can be a persistent and unrelenting fatigue, even if someone is getting enough sleep. Other common symptoms of this disorder include mood swings, weight gain and feeling cold all the time.

Fortunately, simple blood work can reveal if there is a problem and it can be treated with artificial thyroid hormone pills like Synthroid. Check here for signs of having a thyroid problem. If you suspect that you might have hypothyroidism, talk to your doctor.

9. Anemia

People with anemia are not able to make enough red blood cells to transport oxygen throughout the their bodies. This is often due to a lack of nutrients like iron or B-12 and can be caused by problems such as heavy periods, bleeding in the digestive tract or pregnancy (due to the increased demands of the growing baby).

However, in most cases, this can be resolved with treatments like changes in diet, iron supplements or B-12 shots.

While here are some drinks you can try to relieve symptoms of Anemia, it’s best to do a blood test and consult your doctor in case of any hidden medical conditions.

10. Cancer

While you shouldn’t be freaking out about cancer just because you are tired, it is a fact that fatigue is one of the symptoms of cancer. Other common symptoms can include unexplained weight loss and the presence of palpable lumps or growths. This disease is marked by the abnormal and uncontrolled growth of cells that can do damage to surround tissues and possibly spread to other parts of the body.

Diagnosis is usually by biopsy and treatment often focusses on radiation, chemotherapy or surgery— and generally when a diagnosis is made early, the outcomes for the patient are better.

Featured photo credit: Lily Banse via unsplash.com

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