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Dreaming Big vs Being Realistic—”I Just Wanna Know How to Make My Dreams Come True”

Dreaming Big vs Being Realistic—”I Just Wanna Know How to Make My Dreams Come True”

Do big dreams support my journey to success and fulfillment? Does reality even matter? Is “everything” possible? And what is the strategy to make my dreams come true?

There are so many people who are thinking and reflecting about the above-mentioned questions—maybe even you? The following lines provide useful perspectives on the subject of dreaming big vs. being realistic. You should have an answer to the questions after reading this article so you can instantly start making progress on your journey. Enough said; let’s dive into the details.

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It’s a 2-component formula.

Dreaming big is probably the most substantial aspect serving you as a foundation to have a journey paved with success. You should absolutely dream big and reach for more. But obviously it’s not enough to get yourself some food on the table, right? That means there has to be another component you need to implement in your life plan, like living in abundance, for instance.

The second component I’m talking about here is “reality.” I can’t tell you how many times I was told to be realistic in terms of goal setting and pretty much everything else, but I am creating my own world, and I avoid talking about things that aren’t realistic. So where’s the point with that weird reality stuff? Well, I learned something which totally changed my perspective concerning reality. It might sound basic but if you think about it then it’s like the tailwind you actually want. I learned that you have to implement reality as a special tool into your dream-big mindset.

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Inside out and the reality tool—get your freakin’ thoughts out there!

It’s great to have the best ideas and concepts in your head isn’t it? Probably yes. Unfortunately it’s not enough to be the greatest dreamer or the most successful wannabe. So what to do then? This is where reality comes into play.

You have to see reality as a tool—that’s the most beneficial point of view. Reality is the tool you need to make progress in the direction of your dreams. It’s the number-one tool to manifest your visions and dreams in the outer world—the world we consider to be our reality. You have a vision, but you obviously won’t become a doctor, lawyer or business angel simply by believing or dreaming of it.

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No, you should probably get a degree, apply for jobs in your field, get connected with other doctors, lawyers and entrepreneurs. And having a positive “there are no limits” mindset will absolutely support you, but it won’t do the work for you. All in all, you have to align your dreams with the opportunities and capabilities reality offers you. To be specific, in today’s world you can literally learn any skill just by doing some proper Internet research using Google, YouTube, forums, blogs, or sites like this one. By implementing this alignment between dreams and reality in your journey of success, you will definitely achieve results that you didn’t even dream about.

Create an upward spiral of achievement.

Why? Because you have a powerful mindset that doesn’t accept limits, but you also know that you have to take advantage of the “reality-tool” to manifest the things you want to reach. That way, you’re able to push yourself to your personal limits, without getting stuck in an “it’s unrealistic” way of thinking.  And you’re not getting stuck in being a dreamer either. It is strategic self-improvement and self-leadership which ends up in an insanely effective upward spiral of achievement.

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Congratulations, you finally know the so called “secret” about making your dreams come true. Simply add traction to it by letting reality support you the way you want it to. There are thousands of gurus and experts making tons of cash by selling these simple concepts as “secrets.” The weird thing? There is no such thing as “the secret”—just relatively simple strategic concepts that are over-complicated way too often.

Remember this: “Dreams and visions represent your drawing board. Reality is the playground you’re searching for to get things going.”

The problem with so-called motivational “gurus?”

I personally think that most of the so called “gurus” and motivational “experts” just don’t bring up the importance of acting reality-related. They are telling you that everything is possible by having the right attitude, thinking positive and visualizing your goals. But they are not mentioning the action steps you actually have to take to manifest your goals. How do you want to make a living just by imagining yourself being a successful entrepreneur? Probably not at all! In today’s world, having even the “best” mindset is absolutely worthless if you don’t apply for that job, go to the gym, attend that course or see that coach. Whatever it is, please align the resources available to you with the mindset you have.

Yes, everything is possible—if you don’t get stuck due to a lack of reality awareness. It separates the worst from the best, the wannabes from the top performers. Now it’s time to use your whole repertoire to make your wildest dreams come true. Go for it!

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Last Updated on March 25, 2020

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

How Do You Change a Habit (According to Psychology)

Habits are hard to kill, and rightly so. They are a part and parcel of your personality traits and mold your character.

However, habits are not always something over-the-top and quirky enough to get noticed. Think of subtle habits like tapping fingers when you are nervous and humming songs while you drive. These are nothing but ingrained habits that you may not realize easily.

Just take a few minutes and think of something specific that you do all the time. You will notice how it has become a habit for you without any explicit realization. Everything you do on a daily basis starting with your morning routine, lunch preferences to exercise routines are all habits.

Habits mostly form from life experiences and certain observed behaviors, not all of them are healthy. Habitual smoking can be dangerous to your health. Similarly, a habit could also make you lose out on enjoying something to its best – like how some people just cannot stop swaying their bodies when delivering a speech.

Thus, there could be a few habits that you would want to change about yourself. But changing habits is not as easy as it seems.

In this article, you will learn why it isn’t easy to build new habits, and how to change habits.

What Makes It Hard To Change A Habit?

To want to change a particular habit means to change something very fundamental about your behavior.[1] Hence, it’s necessary to understand how habits actually form and why they are so difficult to actually get out of.

The Biology

Habits form in a place what we call the subconscious mind in our brain.[2]

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Our brains have two modes of operation. The first one is an automatic pilot kind of system that is fast and works on reflexes often. It is what we call the subconscious part. This is the part that is associated with everything that comes naturally to you.

The second mode is the conscious mode where every action and decision is well thought out and follows a controlled way of thinking.

A fine example to distinguish both would be to consider yourself learning to drive or play an instrument. For the first time you try learning, you think before every movement you make. But once you have got the hang of it, you might drive without applying much thought into it.

Both systems work together in our brains at all times. When a habit is formed, it moves from the conscious part to the subconscious making it difficult to control.

So, the key idea in deconstructing a habit is to go from the subconscious to the conscious.

Another thing you have to understand about habits is that they can be conscious or hidden.

Conscious habits are those that require active input from your side. For instance, if you stop setting your alarm in the morning, you will stop waking up at the same time.

Hidden habits, on the other hand, are habits that we do without realizing. These make up the majority of our habits and we wouldn’t even know them until someone pointed them out. So the first difficulty in breaking these habits is to actually identify them. As they are internalized, they need a lot of attention to detail for self-identification. That’s not all.

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Habits can be physical, social, and mental, energy-based and even be particular to productivity. Understanding them is necessary to know why they are difficult to break and what can be done about them.

The Psychology

Habits get engraved into our memories depending on the way we think, feel and act over a particular period of time. The procedural part of memory deals with habit formation and studies have observed that various types of conditioning of behavior could affect your habit formations.

Classical conditioning or pavlovian conditioning is when you start associating a memory with reality.[3] A dog that associates ringing bell to food will start salivating. The same external stimuli such as the sound of church bells can make a person want to pray.

Operant conditioning is when experience and the feelings associated with it form a habit.[4] By encouraging or discouraging an act, individuals could either make it a habit or stop doing it.

Observational learning is another way habits could take form. A child may start walking the same way their parent does.

What Can You Do To Change a Habit?

Sure, habits are hard to control but it is not impossible. With a few tips and hard-driven dedication, you can surely get over your nasty habits.

Here are some ways that make use of psychological findings to help you:

1. Identify Your Habits

As mentioned earlier, habits can be quite subtle and hidden from your view. You have to bring your subconscious habits to an aware state of mind. You could do it by self-observation or by asking your friends or family to point out the habit for your sake.

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2. Find out the Impact of Your Habit

Every habit produces an effect – either physical or mental. Find out what exactly it is doing to you. Does it help you relieve stress or does it give you some pain relief?

It could be anything simple. Sometimes biting your nails could be calming your nerves. Understanding the effect of a habit is necessary to control it.

3. Apply Logic

You don’t need to be force-fed with wisdom and advice to know what an unhealthy habit could do to you.

Late-night binge-watching just before an important presentation is not going to help you. Take a moment and apply your own wisdom and logic to control your seemingly nastily habits.

4. Choose an Alternative

As I said, every habit induces some feeling. So, it could be quite difficult to get over it unless you find something else that can replace it. It can be a simple non-harming new habit that you can cultivate to get over a bad habit.

Say you have the habit of banging your head hard when you are angry. That’s going to be bad for you. Instead, the next time you are angry, just take a deep breath and count to 10. Or maybe start imagining yourself on a luxury yacht. Just think of something that will work for you.

5. Remove Triggers

Get rid of items and situations that can trigger your bad habit.

Stay away from smoke breaks if you are trying to quit it. Remove all those candy bars from the fridge if you want to control your sweet cravings.

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6. Visualize Change

Our brains can be trained to forget a habit if we start visualizing the change. Serious visualization is retained and helps as a motivator in breaking the habit loop.

For instance, to replace your habit of waking up late, visualize yourself waking up early and enjoying the early morning jog every day. By continuing this, you would naturally feel better to wake up early and do your new hobby.

7. Avoid Negative Talks and Thinking

Just as how our brain is trained to accept a change in habit, continuous negative talk and thinking could hamper your efforts put into breaking a habit.

Believe you can get out of it and assert yourself the same.

Final Thoughts

Changing habits isn’t easy, so do not expect an overnight change!

Habits took a long time to form. It could take a while to completely break out of it. You will have to accept that sometimes you may falter in your efforts. Don’t let negativity seep in when it seems hard. Keep going at it slowly and steadily.

More About Changing Habits

Featured photo credit: Mel via unsplash.com

Reference

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