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50 Ways To Show Her You Love Her

50 Ways To Show Her You Love Her
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Misunderstandings are the biggest problem in most relationships. Sometimes it can be solved easily, you just don’t know what it is exactly. It could be that she doesn’t feel loved.

When you love someone, you can easily take it for granted. But love is not something to think lightly about. It’s one of the most important things in life, because every other aspect is touched by it.

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But how do you show it? It may not come easy to everyone. Appreciating a person can be done in many ways. So I will help you on your way. Here are 50 ways to show her you really do love her:

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  1. Talk respectfully. Don’t make her feel like she is less important.
  2. Listen to her. Not just to the words she’s saying but to the feeling she tries to express.
  3. Compliment her. Be specific, so she knows you really mean it.
  4. Try to show interest in things she enjoys. Does she like cooking? Help her! Does she like sports? Play it with her! Does she like art? Watch it with her!
  5. Consider her opinion before making a decision. Ask her what she thinks and honestly consider it.
  6. Be forgiving. There is no better way to love someone than to openly forgive and forget. Holding a grudge will not improve your relationship.
  7. Plan a small trip. Take her to a place where you can spend quality time.
  8. Set goals together. If you know from each other what you are working toward, it is easier to support each other. Also, having goals together will bring you closer.
  9. Admit your mistakes. Being open and honest, showing that you too are imperfect will make her feel closer to you.
  10. Have her back. If you get in a situation where you have to choose between your wife and others, choose her. Especially when it is a situation with your family. She already feels like she took you away from them, she needs to feel that you don’t hold that against her.
  11. Give her a mini massage, like a back-rub. Who doesn’t enjoy attention like that?
  12. If she’s not feeling well, even just a headache, make sure you help her out as much as possible. She takes care of you all the time, so show her you appreciate that by taking care of her.
  13. When she asks you to help out with something, don’t respond annoyed. Show her you don’t mind giving a hand. She doesn’t enjoy everything she needs to do either, but someone has to do it.
  14. When you discus a serious subject, don’t go off joking around. Peacefully listen and talk.
  15. When having a conversation, look her in the eye. Show her that you are listening. Don’t get distracted.
  16. Spend as much time as possible with her. She wants to feel like she is the most important person in the world to you. Spending time is the number one thing you do with the number one person in your life.
  17. Put effort into looking good. Workout, shave, shower, put on some deodorant. Whatever makes her feel attracted to you, do it.
  18. Help out around the house, without special recognition! You don’t have to brag about doing something that she does every day.
  19. Be supportive. When she shows that something she wants to do means a lot to her, support her. I wanted to be a writer and told my husband, and see where I am today, writing!
  20. If she says something is bothering her, don’t ignore it. Talk about it. Small things that stay on your mind, will grow into big things that are hard to solve.
  21. Work on yourself. Everyone changes over time. When she mentions some behavior that she doesn’t appreciate, show her you are trying to improve on it.
  22. Surprise her. Give her a lovely card or letter. Show up with flowers. Buy her that bracelet she wanted. Anything small is good. It doesn’t have to be expensive either. Surprises are what keep your relationship alive.
  23. When in a relaxed state, make her comfortable. For example, when watching tv, sit close and cuddle her or hold her hand.
  24. Let her know you think of her when you are not together, by texting or calling.
  25. Be pro-active. If she notices that you are trying the best you can at all times, she will respect you for that.
  26. Show affection in public. Hold her hand, give her a kiss, hug her. Don’t be ashamed or afraid to show her you love her, even when people can see it.
  27. Are you going to be later than expected? Let her know! She won’t feel important if you won’t even let her know that you’re late.
  28. Ask her what she’s insecure about. If you want to be the hero who helps her out, you should have an idea what’s she’s afraid of. There are a lot of unstable factors in life, so maybe you can help her with things like a job, place to live or even just letting her know she is important.
  29. Refuse to compare her to others. She is your number one! Why even start to compare? She has to be the only one you care about.
  30. When you started to fall in love, you were dating. Why change what’s good? Take her out on dates to stay in love!
  31. She probably makes dinner for you every night… Why not let her relax while you clean up afterwards? Or better, make dinner once in a while.
  32. If she’s feeling discouraged or hurt, hold her and tell her you love and care for her. She just needs to feel you are there for her at the times she needs you the most.
  33. Brag about her. When she’s around, and when she’s not around. Brag about her. Too many people talk negatively. You chose her, so brag about her.
  34. Let her be free to say what’s on her mind. When she speaks from the heart, don’t tell her her feelings aren’t important or dumb.
  35. Explore who she is. Try to know more about her. Talk about every subject you can think about. See what her viewpoint is on the deeper things in life. Ask as many questions as you can come up with.
  36. Don’t make her feel guilty. Don’t put your problems on her. If you have a problem, talk about it patiently.
  37. Make her something. Don’t just buy gifts, create them. Maybe you can make a journal about your relationship, noting down all the important things that happened and adding little memories to cherish.
  38. Take pictures with her. Ladies take a lot of pictures but they don’t have the same meaning as when you do it. Try to make a picture every time you’re together, that’s a way to capture a precious moment.
  39. When you’re around each other a lot, you have to deal with a lot of serious matters. Try to add in a little bit of fun by making a joke or tickling her. (Know when to stop, because you don’t want to annoy her.)
  40. Call her cute names. You don’t want to sound like a businessman by just using her name. But always using the same nickname can also get boring, so mix it up.
  41. Be strong enough to let her help you. When it comes to emotional things, you may need a little help. Let her help you. It’ll show trust and love.
  42. Don’t give love to expect it back. Don’t show her you care just to get it back. Give freely.
  43. Don’t see her as weak, but as precious. Women are usually more emotional than men. But that is not weak. She has to be the most important thing in your life. How can she be important if you look down on her? She is precious.
  44. Don’t just appreciate how she looks, also love her personality. If she knows you appreciate her for who she is and not just what she looks like, she will feel more love and appreciate you more.
  45. Realize that she is like a gift. Every day of your life with her, remember that she’s a gift in your life. You could be alone, taking care of yourself, but remember she’s there to take care of you too. Don’t take her for granted.
  46. Do what you say. When you agree on something, follow through. It may not be the easiest for you, but really do the best you can to do as you agreed on.
  47. Celebrate accomplishments. Don’t say ‘cool’ and keep on living life. If she did something she’s proud of or you’re proud of, let her know. Get a bottle of wine or get a little something to celebrate.
  48. Find out what she likes in bed and do that.
  49. Leave little notes around the house, with sweet messages, so every time she enters a room or uses a different appliance around the house, she has a little surprise. (I got this tip from my husband, who did this when I was feeling down. Made me feel amazing!)
  50. Tell her you love her! You can never say it often enough. Keep reminding her every day, hour, minute, that you love her!

And of course, almost everything on this list can be ways to show him you love him too!

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Featured photo credit: mari lezhava via unsplash.com

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Florence Carmen Bukasa

Florence is a happy wife and passionate writer who blogs about health, love and life.

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)
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You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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