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7 Personal Philosophies You Need For Success In Life

7 Personal Philosophies You Need For Success In Life

We all want success in life right? Whether it be success in relationships, achieving our ideal body, sporting performance, business etc. Whatever it is many of us always seem to be on this never ending path, striving for such success. But more often than not we are our own worst enemy. We often get in our own way, inhibiting our own development. Why is this? Because we haven’t developed the personal philosophies we need in order to have success in life.

This simple 7 step approach I learned from Tony Robbins will show you how:

1. Always act from personal power

What is meant by personal power? Personal power is the ability to take action. But what prevents people from taking action? The answer is obvious; fear!

The biggest fear is the fear of failure. So what we need to agree upon together, and on a personal level, is to discipline our mindset into realising that there are no failures, there are only results or outcomes. You never fail in life, you always succeed. You succeed in getting results of some sort. The key is what we do with those results.

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Think about it… How many of us always get our goals? Very few I would imagine. But how many of us always get a result or an outcome? We all do.

I have often quoted this myself but famous speakers like Zig Ziglar, Jim Rohn, Tony Robbins any many others have often said; It’s not what happens that defines you, it’s what you do with what happens…

The bottom line is, how many of us feel great about failing? But how many of us feel great about learning? So the way we can ensure that we succeed from now on is to realise that there are no failures and that you can always improve through learning from your experiences. Something I have always tried to teach my students is the word F.A.I.L actually stands for First Attempt In Learning.

2. Take responsibility for your world

Shouldn’t we all? There’s a belief in this world, that I completely resonate with, that everything that has happened to you in your life is as a direct result of your actions, either your physical actions or your mental actions. Thoughts are things. As you think so you become. This belief is The Law of Attraction.

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Perhaps you don’t hold this belief system. After all this is a very stern line, which at first is difficult to accept. But let me try to explain to you how this is so. If you’re not responsible for your world and you encounter a problem, who has the power to change it?

When you realise that you have a problem in a world that you are responsible for, you have the power, the power to change it! This belief system is not to say to you that things are your fault, but to empower you to believe that you can change your life circumstances whatever the situation.

3. Always stretch and challenge yourself

It’s essential if you want to grow as a human being that you stretch and challenge yourself on a consistent basis. Put yourself into situations that make you feel uncomfortable as it is outside of the comfort zone where the magic happens! When you put yourself on the line, you realise that you can and have to perform. Human beings can do amazing things when they put themselves on the line, they can do things that they never thought possible.

Let me ask you, how many times has a pending deadline made you work your ass off and get results? Some of us do our best kind of work under such pressure. By stretching, we develop, we achieve. And when we do, we realise that it’s not our ability that holds us back but our thinking.

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There are several keys to stretching yourself:

  • Make a commitment to yourself to do something that seems to be beyond your present ability.
  • Make a public commitment, a public declaration to someone significant in your life who can hold you to account.
  • Model someone that is already producing the result that seems to be beyond your present ability.
  • Do it! Take action, follow the steps of your model and when you don’t know what to do, act as if you do know what to do. “Well if I did know what to do then I’d do this…” This mindset takes away the limiting belief you have and allows you to get access to the resources you really have as an incredible human being.

4. Commit to unconscious competence rather than cognitive understanding

Unconscious competence is when you don’t have to understand every little detail, you just run with it and things flow. Whereas cognitive understanding is where you understand every little detail, how things work and why things happen. It’s here where we often get caught up and bogged down, limiting us from taking action.

In his book Unlimited Power, Tony Robbins put it like this; “You don’t have to study the roots of a plant to be able to pick the fruit! Pick the fruit now and get the nourishment you need!”

My point is that it’s essential you immerse yourself in action, in activity, rather than understanding every last detail.

In my opinion, experiential learning is far more powerful than studying books and lectures. I know this from personal experience. When I began my teaching career I was thrown into a class of poorly behaved, underachieving 14 year old pupils and told to teach them a topic I had just studied the morning before. I tell you now, I learned far more from that experience than I would have reading a book on teaching or sitting at the back of a lecture theater with other teacher trainees. That’s were my career began and I never looked back. I’ve since had a successful career and worked myself all the way to senior leadership.

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5. Always act from personal integrity

By integrity we mean that we act within our own belief systems. As long as you believe that they are true and make sure that you take consistent action that matches up to your belief systems, your progress will match up with your goals and you will develop they way you need to and have more personal success in life.

Another meaning of integrity is wholeness. Just think about this for a minute. If someone is not acting from personal integrity, in line with their belief systems, would you consider them to be whole? A person who is genuine? Would you be likely to go them for advice, or buy a product or service from their business?

6. The meaning of communication is the response you get

If you are not getting the result you desire, even if you’re taking action with all good intentions, what do you need to do? Change! Remember the world works through stimulus and response.

If your communications aren’t working, it’s not because your audience is wrong, it’s because your physiology, your tonality, your body language etc. triggered the wrong response. So what should you do? Change your approach! Use different words, adjust your tone, alter your body language. Communication is everything, not intention. Results mean everything.

7. Commit to do whatever it takes to succeed

Of course with the exception of causing harm to others!

This final discipline underpins all of the above. If we wish for success in life, it’s essential we commit to making that wish become a reality. The key to success in life is to go from interest to commitment to taking action from personal power.

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Last Updated on July 17, 2019

The Science of Setting Goals (And How It Affects Your Brain)

The Science of Setting Goals (And How It Affects Your Brain)

What happens in our heads when we set goals?

Apparently a lot more than you’d think.

Goal setting isn’t quite so simple as deciding on the things you’d like to accomplish and working towards them.

According to the research of psychologists, neurologists, and other scientists, setting a goal invests ourselves into the target as if we’d already accomplished it. That is, by setting something as a goal, however small or large, however near or far in the future, a part of our brain believes that desired outcome is an essential part of who we are – setting up the conditions that drive us to work towards the goals to fulfill the brain’s self-image.

Apparently, the brain cannot distinguish between things we want and things we have. Neurologically, then, our brains treat the failure to achieve our goal the same way as it treats the loss of a valued possession. And up until the moment, the goal is achieved, we have failed to achieve it, setting up a constant tension that the brain seeks to resolve.

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Ideally, this tension is resolved by driving us towards accomplishment. In many cases, though, the brain simply responds to the loss, causing us to feel fear, anxiety, even anguish, depending on the value of the as-yet-unattained goal.

Love, Loss, Dopamine, and Our Dreams

The brains functions are carried out by a stew of chemicals called neurotransmitters. You’ve probably heard of serotonin, which plays a key role in our emotional life – most of the effective anti-depressant medications on the market are serotonin reuptake inhibitors, meaning they regulate serotonin levels in the brain leading to more stable moods.

Somewhat less well-known is another neurotransmitter, dopamine. Among other things, dopamine acts as a motivator, creating a sensation of pleasure when the brain is stimulated by achievement. Dopamine is also involved in maintaining attention – some forms of ADHD are linked to irregular responses to dopamine.[1]

So dopamine plays a key role in keeping us focused on our goals and motivating us to attain them, rewarding our attention and achievement by elevating our mood. That is, we feel good when we work towards our goals.

Dopamine is related to wanting – to desire. The attainment of the object of our desire releases dopamine into our brains and we feel good. Conversely, the frustration of our desires starves us of dopamine, causing anxiety and fear.

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One of the greatest desires is romantic love – the long-lasting, “till death do us part” kind. It’s no surprise, then, that romantic love is sustained, at least in part, through the constant flow of dopamine released in the presence – real or imagined – of our true love. Loss of romantic love cuts off that supply of dopamine, which is why it feels like you’re dying – your brain responds by triggering all sorts of anxiety-related responses.

Herein lies obsession, as we go to ever-increasing lengths in search of that dopamine reward. Stalking specialists warn against any kind of contact with a stalker, positive or negative, because any response at all triggers that reward mechanism. If you let the phone ring 50 times and finally pick up on the 51st ring to tell your stalker off, your stalker gets his or her reward, and learns that all s/he has to do is wait for the phone to ring 51 times.

Romantic love isn’t the only kind of desire that can create this kind of dopamine addiction, though – as Captain Ahab (from Moby Dick) knew well, any suitably important goal can become an obsession once the mind has established ownership.

The Neurology of Ownership

Ownership turns out to be about a lot more than just legal rights. When we own something, we invest a part of ourselves into it – it becomes an extension of ourselves.

In a famous experiment at Cornell University, researchers gave students school logo coffee mugs, and then offered to trade them chocolate bars for the mugs. Very few were willing to make the trade, no matter how much they professed to like chocolate. Big deal, right? Maybe they just really liked those mugs![2]

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But when they reversed the experiment, handing out chocolate and then offering to trade mugs for the candy, they found that now, few students were all that interested in the mugs. Apparently the key thing about the mugs or the chocolate wasn’t whether students valued whatever they had in their possession, but simply that they had it in their possession.

This phenomenon is called the “endowment effect”. In a nutshell, the endowment effect occurs when we take ownership of an object (or idea, or person); in becoming “ours” it becomes integrated with our sense of identity, making us reluctant to part with it (losing it is seen as a loss, which triggers that dopamine shut-off I discussed above).

Interestingly, researchers have found that the endowment effect doesn’t require actual ownership or even possession to come into play. In fact, it’s enough to have a reasonable expectation of future possession for us to start thinking of something as a part of us – as jilted lovers, gambling losers, and 7-year olds denied a toy at the store have all experienced.

The Upshot for Goal-Setters

So what does all this mean for would-be achievers?

On one hand, it’s a warning against setting unreasonable goals. The bigger the potential for positive growth a goal has, the more anxiety and stress your brain is going to create around it’s non-achievement.

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It also suggests that the common wisdom to limit your goals to a small number of reasonable, attainable objectives is good advice. The more goals you have, the more ends your brain thinks it “owns” and therefore the more grief and fear the absence of those ends is going to cause you.

On a more positive note, the fact that the brain rewards our attentiveness by releasing dopamine means that our brain is working with us to direct us to achievement. Paying attention to your goals feels good, encouraging us to spend more time doing it. This may be why outcome visualization — a favorite technique of self-help gurus involving imagining yourself having completed your objectives — has such a poor track record in clinical studies. It effectively tricks our brain into rewarding us for achieving our goals even though we haven’t done it yet!

But ultimately, our brain wants us to achieve our goals, so that it’s a sense of who we are that can be fulfilled. And that’s pretty good news!

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Featured photo credit: Alexa Williams via unsplash.com

Reference

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