Advertising
Advertising

9 Ways Mentally Strong People Retain Their Personal Power

9 Ways Mentally Strong People Retain Their Personal Power

We can look at different aspects of someone’s personality to try and gauge what makes them seem to radiate power as soon as they walk into a room or during discussions and stressful situations, but the one thing that stands out the most is a distinct psychological fortitude. For a mentally strong person, projecting an aura of confidence and toughness seems to come naturally, as if they aren’t even aware of it – but there is a method to it.

There are a number of things that these people do that help them firmly cement their high social status and establish themselves as trustworthy leaders, skilled experts and people in possession of admirable characteristics. We will be looking at the 9 main ways of keeping your personal power, even when faced with great adversity and toxic people.

1. They don’t worry about what others think

Don’t get me wrong, being able to empathize with others and accurately gauge how they feel and think are essentials traits for anyone who wants to become successful, but you don’t want to try to please everyone all the time. Understanding people, social norms and proper protocol is one thing, but you should never allow yourself to make decisions solely based on what others might think. Mentally strong people aren’t afraid to be themselves and make their own decisions, and that’s what gives them power.

Advertising

2. They don’t wait for others to solve their problems

One of the main characteristics of mentally strong and powerful people is that they are doers. These people are confident and even a little boastful, but they can back up their claims, and they are active – they solve problems, jump on opportunities and aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty. This gives them a good amount of self-reliance, which in turn makes them incredibly resistant to attempts by others to take away their power.

3. They admit their shortcoming and continually strive to improve

While some people like to take shortcuts and aren’t above padding up their resumes with fake achievements and presenting themselves as something that they’re not, they are not acting from a place of true power. It is weakness that causes men and women to try to hide their shortcomings from themselves and blatantly lie to others about their skills, knowledge and competence.

To maintain a position of power, you must be able to admit that you have faults, and be willing to work hard on becoming a person that people respect and admire.

Advertising

4. They don’t wear their emotions on their sleeve

You cannot hope to retain personal power and project confidence if you keep exploding and throwing temper tantrums every time someone disagrees with you or says something that offends you. If everyone can instantly see that you are happy with something, sad, angry or disinterested, there is no way for you tactfully dominate the situation – in fact, you need to be aware of the things that trigger these emotional responses in you, and work on keeping your cool during heated arguments. This is how you retain a dominant position during an argument, and it’s how you build up a reputation as a level-headed and strong individual.

5. They make an actual effort to stay positive and relaxed

Just as mentally strong people don’t rely on others to solve their problems for them, or for those problems to magically resolve themselves, they also don’t wait around for others to motivate and cheer them up or the universe itself to align just right and give them what they need to be happy. Staying calm, relaxed and positive requires continual effort; anyone can flip out and resort to worrying, but it takes a special kind of mindset to acknowledge the harsh reality and still be able to keep pushing forward. It’s their ability to remain calm and positive, and their resolve to always find some time to relax, that makes these people stand out.

6. They think carefully before they act or speak

We’ve talked a lot about getting things done and trying to learn from mistakes, but that doesn’t mean that you need to be impulsive or actively seek out situations where you will be put on the spot. One of the most important fail-safe mechanisms for keeping your personal power at an admirable level is the ability to keep your mouth shut until you know what you need to say to tip the odds in your favor.

Advertising

No matter how emphatic and caring you are, the bottom line is that you need things to work out a certain way for you to be satisfied, and it’s not always going to be in everyone’s best interest that the situation unfolds the way you want it to. This is why you need to take the time to think things through and find the right approach, tone and words before doing or saying something.

7. They have a strong sense of self-worth and are assertive

It’s easy to take someone’s power away if the person does not know their own worth and can’t effectively set boundaries. The main thing is not to give other’s power over you, while at the same time protecting yourself from attacks aimed at eroding aspects of your power and confidence. You don’t have to resort to shouting or offending anyone – you just need to be assertive and unyielding when it comes to your core values. A good negotiator will make a couple of steps back if need be or make compromises, but they will also know when to stand their ground.

8. They leave their ego at home and look for logical solutions

Erratic emotions are only part of the reason why people lose their personal power and the respect of others during difficult social encounters; another big problem is ego-driven decision-making. It’s not always as clear as someone losing their temper, breaking into tears or going on a tirade about how their feelings are hurt, but the ego has a nasty habit of making everything seem personal.

Advertising

It is also the main reason why people get into heated arguments and even fistfights over trivial issues, and that is not something that a person that emanates power and confidence will ever do.

9. They create a realistic schedule for themselves

When you’ve covered all the important psychological aspects involved in retaining personal power and can exhibit a good deal of self-control and restraint, without sacrificing your integrity or giving your power away, it’s time to delve into the practical side of things. You can’t accomplish much if you don’t know how to organize your life, and the first step is being honest with yourself.

Be honest about what you can and cannot do, the time it takes to complete certain tasks and the myriad of smaller tasks related to the main one. For example going to the gym involves preparation, driving, changing, warming up, the actual workout, drying off, changing, driving home, a shower, another change of clothes and a post-workout meal. Even if it’s a short 30 minute workout, you won’t be going anywhere for a good hour or two, and you’ll have to schedule around it or potentially do the workout at another time or even tomorrow.

Advertising

Some people are more naturally gifted and skilled in the ways of mental toughness, but developing, projecting and protecting your personal power are things that can be learned through lots of practice. As long as you know the right way to do so, you can become mentally strong and take full control of your own life.

More by this author

Nemanja Manojlovic

Editor at MyCity Web

How To Workout Without a Gym And Get a Killer Gym Body 10 Things To Remember If You Love A Sociopath The Smart Ways to Save Money Fast (Even If You’re a Big Spender) 5 Secrets to Being Confident and Earning People’s Respect 10 Sustainable Health And Fitness Habits Everyone Can Adopt

Trending in Communication

1 Is Living Together Before Marriage Good or Bad? 2 How To Improve Listening Skills For Effective Workplace Communication 3 11 Facts About Volunteering That Will Surely Impress You 4 I Hate My Wife – Why a Husband Would Resent His Spouse 5 How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Published on May 18, 2021

How To Improve Listening Skills For Effective Workplace Communication

How To Improve Listening Skills For Effective Workplace Communication

We have two ears and one mouth for a reason—effective communication is dependent on using them in proportion, and this involves having good listening skills.

The workplace of the 21st century may not look the same as it did before COVID-19 spread throughout the world like wildfire, but that doesn’t mean you can relax your standards at work. If anything, Zoom meetings, conference calls, and the continuous time spent behind a screen have created a higher level of expectations for meeting etiquette and communication. And this goes further than simply muting your microphone during a meeting.

Effective workplace communication has been a topic of discussion for decades, yet, it is rarely addressed or implemented due to a lack of awareness and personal ownership by all parties.

Effective communication isn’t just about speaking clearly or finding the appropriate choice of words. It starts with intentional listening and being present. Here’s how to improve your listening skills for effective workplace communication.

Listen to Understand, Not to Speak

There are stark differences between listening and hearing. Listening involves intention, focused effort, and concentration, whereas hearing simply involves low-level awareness that someone else is speaking. Listening is a voluntary activity that allows one to be present and in the moment while hearing is passive and effortless.[1]

Which one would you prefer your colleagues to implement during your company-wide presentation? It’s a no-brainer.

Advertising

Listening can be one of the most powerful tools in your communication arsenal because one must listen to understand the message being told to them. As a result of this deeper understanding, communication can be streamlined because there is a higher level of comprehension that will facilitate practical follow-up questions, conversations, and problem-solving. And just because you heard something doesn’t mean you actually understood it.

We take this for granted daily, but that doesn’t mean we can use that as an excuse.

Your brain is constantly scanning your environment for threats, opportunities, and situations to advance your ability to promote your survival. And yet, while we are long past the days of worrying about being eaten by wildlife, the neurocircuitry responsible for these mechanisms is still hard-wired into our psychology and neural processing.

A classic example of this is the formation of memories. Case in point: where were you on June 3rd, 2014? For most of you reading this article, your mind will go completely blank, which isn’t necessarily bad.

The brain is far too efficient to retain every detail about every event that happens in your life, mainly because many events that occur aren’t always that important. The brain doesn’t—and shouldn’t—care what you ate for lunch three weeks ago or what color shirt you wore golfing last month. But for those of you who remember where you were on June 3rd, 2014, this date probably holds some sort of significance to you. Maybe it was a birthday or an anniversary. Perhaps it was the day your child was born. It could have even been a day where you lost someone special in your life.

Regardless of the circumstance, the brain is highly stimulated through emotion and engagement, which is why memories are usually stored in these situations. When the brain’s emotional centers become activated, the brain is far more likely to remember an event.[2] And this is also true when intention and focus are applied to listening to a conversation.

Advertising

Utilizing these hard-wired primitive pathways of survival to optimize your communication in the workplace is a no-brainer—literally and figuratively.

Intentional focus and concentrated efforts will pay off in the long run because you will retain more information and have an easier time recalling it down the road, making you look like a superstar in front of your colleagues and co-workers. Time to kiss those note-taking days away!

Effective Communication Isn’t Always Through Words

While we typically associate communication with words and verbal affirmations, communication can come in all shapes and forms. In the Zoom meeting era we live in, it has become far more challenging to utilize and understand these other forms of language. And this is because they are typically easier to see when we are sitting face to face with the person we speak to.[3]

Body language can play a significant role in how our words and communication are interpreted, especially when there is a disconnection involved.[4] When someone tells you one thing, yet their body language screams something completely different, it’s challenging to let that go. Our brain immediately starts to search for more information and inevitably prompts us to follow up with questions that will provide greater clarity to the situation at hand. And in all reality, not saying something might be just as important as actually saying something.

These commonly overlooked non-verbal communication choices can provide a plethora of information about the intentions, emotions, and motivations. We do this unconsciously, and it happens with every confrontation, conversation, and interaction we engage in. The magic lies in the utilization and active interpretation of these signals to improve your listening skills and your communication skills.

Our brains were designed for interpreting our world, which is why we are so good at recognizing subtle nuances and underlying disconnect within our casual encounters. So, when we begin to notice conflicting messages between verbal and non-verbal communication, our brain takes us down a path of troubleshooting.

Advertising

Which messages are consistent with this theme over time? Which statements aren’t aligning with what they’re really trying to tell me? How should I interpret their words and body language?

Suppose we want to break things down even further. In that case, one must understand that body language is usually a subconscious event, meaning that we rarely think about our body language. This happens because our brain’s primary focus is to string together words and phrases for verbal communication, which usually requires a higher level of processing. This doesn’t mean that body language will always tell the truth, but it does provide clues to help us weigh information, which can be pretty beneficial in the long run.

Actively interpreting body language can provide you with an edge in your communication skills. It can also be used as a tool to connect with the individual you are speaking to. This process is deeply ingrained into our human fabric and utilizes similar methods babies use while learning new skills from their parents’ traits during the early years of development.

Mirroring a person’s posture or stance can create a subtle bond, facilitating a sense of feeling like one another. This process is triggered via the activation of specific brain regions through the stimulation of specialized neurons called mirror neurons.[5] These particular neurons become activated while watching an individual engage in an activity or task, facilitating learning, queuing, and understanding. They also allow the person watching an action to become more efficient at physically executing the action, creating changes in the brain, and altering the overall structure of the brain to enhance output for that chosen activity.

Listening with intention can make you understand your colleague, and when paired together with mirroring body language, you can make your colleague feel like you two are alike. This simple trick can facilitate a greater bond of understanding and communication within all aspects of the conversation.

Eliminate All Distractions, Once and for All

As Jim Rohn says, “What is easy to do is also easy not to do.” And this is an underlying principle that will carry through in all aspects of communication. Distractions are a surefire way to ensure a lack of understanding or interpretation of a conversation, which in turn, will create inefficiencies and a poor foundation for communication.

Advertising

This should come as no surprise, especially in this day in age where people are constantly distracted by social media, text messaging, and endlessly checking their emails. We’re stuck in a cultural norm that has hijacked our love for the addictive dopamine rush and altered our ability to truly focus our efforts on the task at hand. And these distractions aren’t just distractions for the time they’re being used. They use up coveted brainpower and central processes that secondarily delay our ability to get back on track.

Gloria Mark, a researcher at UC Irvine, discovered that it takes an average of 23 minutes and 15 seconds for our brains to reach their peak state of focus after an interruption.[6] Yes, you read that correctly—distractions are costly, error-prone, and yield little to no benefit outside of a bump to the ego when receiving a new like on your social media profile.

Meetings should implement a no-phone policy, video conference calls should be set on their own browser with no other tabs open, and all updates, notifications, and email prompt should be immediately turned off, if possible, to eliminate all distractions during a meeting.

These are just a few examples of how we can optimize our environment to facilitate the highest levels of communication within the workplace.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Effective communication in the workplace doesn’t have to be challenging, but it does have to be intentional. Knowledge can only take us so far, but once again, knowing something is very different than putting it into action.

Just like riding a bike, the more often you do it, the easier it becomes. Master communicators are phenomenal listeners, which allows them to be effective communicators in the workplace and in life. If you genuinely want to own your communication, you must implement this information today and learn how to improve your listening skills.

Advertising

Choose your words carefully, listen intently, and most of all, be present in the moment—because that’s what master communicators do, and you can do it, too!

More Tips Improving Listening Skills

Featured photo credit: Mailchimp via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next