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8 Things You Should Do When You Cannot Make a Decision

8 Things You Should Do When You Cannot Make a Decision

One thing we all have in common is making choices every day, whether we like it or not. Decisions are a big part of our daily life and often we struggle with making the right one. That’s when doubt, perfectionism and distractions get in the way. And we end up regretting our choice, feeling bad about it, and constantly wondering if we could have made a wiser decision.

If that sounds familiar, don’t worry. Sometimes we just need to choose an option and make the most of it. But in case you often cannot make a decision, here are some things you can do to make it easier.

1. Don’t overanalyze it.

Most people tend to overthink the situation, even if it’s a simple one we encounter daily. We often waste time deciding what to wear, whether to call someone or not and what to eat for each meal.

In cases like that, there’s no wrong option really. So just do it. Take action right away before your brain has the chance to think of different scenarios and confuse you.

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2. Automate some decisions.

Every time you make a choice, no matter how small or random, you’re investing some of your decision making capabilities. And it’s a finite resource. That’s why most people indulge in unhealthy and unproductive activities in the evening, when they’ve already made many decisions throughout the day.

But you can prevent that from happening by automating some decisions you have to make daily. Take your meals, for example. It’s much easier to decide to eat the same thing every day for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And just stick to it.

That will save you so much time and worries in the future. And you’ll finally have a meal plan. You can also set fixed hours for going to bed and waking up. That leads to a structured day and better personal organization.

I personally like how many successful people wear the same thing every day. Not having to decide what to wear takes away the stress about it. I have implemented that for myself and have seen the results.

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3. Be positive about the outcome.

No matter what you choose, you can always make the best of it. How we handle life is all about our attitude towards it and how we react to what happens to us. So be optimistic. Know that you’re doing your best and no decision can make you regret that.

4. Learn from your mistakes.

Every bad choice in life results in experience and knowledge. We can move on knowing what we shouldn’t do next time, and that makes things so much easier. Don’t feel bad about what you did wrong. Don’t take it personally either. Simply decide not to do the same thing again.

5. Let your decisions resonate with your goals in life.

Goal-oriented individuals are more decisive. That’s because they’ve figured out what they want, and what they don’t want, and remind themselves of that daily. You can do it too. Be specific about your dreams and goals. Write them down and see what you need to do and who you need to become to get there.

Then, whenever you face a challenge and need to take a decision, do it while keeping your goal in mind. This way there won’t be any doubt as always one of the possible choices will be related to your life goals.

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6. Trust your instincts.

Often other people will try to interfere, to talk you out of something you truly want, or else. But you shouldn’t let them. Even if they love you and want to see you succeed. That’s your path to walk and only you can make the right decision. But there’s always a next one so you need to keep going.

Trust your intuition more than you trust other people and factors. Stop looking out for signs from the universe or asking people to make a choice on your behalf. Instead, get to know your inner self better. It already knows the answer. You just need to get to it.

7. Be confident.

Confidence is a powerful skill and helps in many situations. A confident person feels comfortable in his skin, is sure in his abilities, and that helps him let go of doubts and insecurity. He knows he has what it takes to succeed and even if he fails, he’ll try again. That’s why a higher self-esteem leads to being more decisive too. So work on your confidence.

8. Be selective.

Understand that you can’t have it all, and you don’t need to. Some people want to choose all the possible options at once. But it just won’t work like that. Our time and focus are limited. So we need to be selective in life and make sure we don’t dedicate too much energy to meaningless stuff.

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Choose what’s important to you, what has worked in the past, what feels right in this moment, and what you feel confident is good for you. That’s how you start making decisions more easily and make sure you won’t regret the outcome.

What else helps you be more decisive in daily life?

Featured photo credit: the road more travelled/Simon G via flickr.com

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Last Updated on April 14, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

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