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8 Things You Should Do When You Cannot Make a Decision

8 Things You Should Do When You Cannot Make a Decision

One thing we all have in common is making choices every day, whether we like it or not. Decisions are a big part of our daily life and often we struggle with making the right one. That’s when doubt, perfectionism and distractions get in the way. And we end up regretting our choice, feeling bad about it, and constantly wondering if we could have made a wiser decision.

If that sounds familiar, don’t worry. Sometimes we just need to choose an option and make the most of it. But in case you often cannot make a decision, here are some things you can do to make it easier.

1. Don’t overanalyze it.

Most people tend to overthink the situation, even if it’s a simple one we encounter daily. We often waste time deciding what to wear, whether to call someone or not and what to eat for each meal.

In cases like that, there’s no wrong option really. So just do it. Take action right away before your brain has the chance to think of different scenarios and confuse you.

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2. Automate some decisions.

Every time you make a choice, no matter how small or random, you’re investing some of your decision making capabilities. And it’s a finite resource. That’s why most people indulge in unhealthy and unproductive activities in the evening, when they’ve already made many decisions throughout the day.

But you can prevent that from happening by automating some decisions you have to make daily. Take your meals, for example. It’s much easier to decide to eat the same thing every day for breakfast, lunch and dinner. And just stick to it.

That will save you so much time and worries in the future. And you’ll finally have a meal plan. You can also set fixed hours for going to bed and waking up. That leads to a structured day and better personal organization.

I personally like how many successful people wear the same thing every day. Not having to decide what to wear takes away the stress about it. I have implemented that for myself and have seen the results.

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3. Be positive about the outcome.

No matter what you choose, you can always make the best of it. How we handle life is all about our attitude towards it and how we react to what happens to us. So be optimistic. Know that you’re doing your best and no decision can make you regret that.

4. Learn from your mistakes.

Every bad choice in life results in experience and knowledge. We can move on knowing what we shouldn’t do next time, and that makes things so much easier. Don’t feel bad about what you did wrong. Don’t take it personally either. Simply decide not to do the same thing again.

5. Let your decisions resonate with your goals in life.

Goal-oriented individuals are more decisive. That’s because they’ve figured out what they want, and what they don’t want, and remind themselves of that daily. You can do it too. Be specific about your dreams and goals. Write them down and see what you need to do and who you need to become to get there.

Then, whenever you face a challenge and need to take a decision, do it while keeping your goal in mind. This way there won’t be any doubt as always one of the possible choices will be related to your life goals.

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6. Trust your instincts.

Often other people will try to interfere, to talk you out of something you truly want, or else. But you shouldn’t let them. Even if they love you and want to see you succeed. That’s your path to walk and only you can make the right decision. But there’s always a next one so you need to keep going.

Trust your intuition more than you trust other people and factors. Stop looking out for signs from the universe or asking people to make a choice on your behalf. Instead, get to know your inner self better. It already knows the answer. You just need to get to it.

7. Be confident.

Confidence is a powerful skill and helps in many situations. A confident person feels comfortable in his skin, is sure in his abilities, and that helps him let go of doubts and insecurity. He knows he has what it takes to succeed and even if he fails, he’ll try again. That’s why a higher self-esteem leads to being more decisive too. So work on your confidence.

8. Be selective.

Understand that you can’t have it all, and you don’t need to. Some people want to choose all the possible options at once. But it just won’t work like that. Our time and focus are limited. So we need to be selective in life and make sure we don’t dedicate too much energy to meaningless stuff.

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Choose what’s important to you, what has worked in the past, what feels right in this moment, and what you feel confident is good for you. That’s how you start making decisions more easily and make sure you won’t regret the outcome.

What else helps you be more decisive in daily life?

Featured photo credit: the road more travelled/Simon G via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

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When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

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I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

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No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

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If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

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