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7 Courageous Things You Could Do To Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

7 Courageous Things You Could Do To Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

“The best piece of advice someone has ever given me was ‘do it scared.’ And no matter if you’re scared, just go ahead and do it anyway because you might as well do it scared, so it will get done and you will feel so much better if you step out of your comfort zone” – Sheri Shepard

It is a dangerous thing  living in your comfort zone because you never really explore the opportunity to chase your dreams. You are protected from the roller coaster ride of life and as a result you have no life lessons from which you can base how you live your life and the kind of person you want to be.

Living in your comfort zone supports the feelings, thoughts and beliefs that do not serve you well and prevent you from living your life to the fullest. Your fears about life become your reality and you have no idea about your potential, your talents and your skills. You really have no idea about who you are. If you want to live your life to the fullest and you want to achieve your dreams then you are going to have to step out of your comfort zone. Your comfort zone is your self made prison and the longer you stay there the less chance you will have to live your life to your fullest potential.

Living in the comfort zone brings you certainty in life, (or so you think). When you have this so called feeling of certainty then you feel safe and you will do what ever it takes to convince yourself that certainty and feeling safe is the best thing for you. At times it is important to feel safe and confident about what is happening in your life. However if you refuse to step out of your comfort zone your safety net of certainty eventually becomes your prison cell. If you stay there long enough finding the key to release you from your prison becomes too hard.  You end up accepting  safety and fear as the benchmarks to how you live life.

I have lived parts of my life in the comfort zone and for awhile I felt safe and reasonably happy (so I thought). I was good at convincing myself I was happy and also very skilled at dismissing my feelings of dissatisfaction, disappointment and regret.

One question that would constantly pop up in my mind was “Is there something better for me in life or is this it?”. Of course being an expert  at living in the comfort zone I could quickly rationalise with myself that actually life is okay and it’s not worth rocking the boat. As a result I lost out on many opportunities because I was too scared of the unknown and too scared to step out of my comfort zone. It is very hard to be proactive and take on opportunities when one is living in their comfort zone.

Living in your comfort zone is all about personal choice, in that you are the one and only person who can choose to stay or to go. I was forced to leave my comfort zone as a result of  2 major life events – the sudden loss of both parents and the loss of 3 jobs in 18 months. To deal with these major life events I had to leave my comfort zone, I needed to heal and work through the pain and grief of losing my parents and the feelings of failure and rejection as a result of  being made redundant three times in eighteen months.

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I knew that by staying in  my comfort zone I would be shut away from the reality of what was happening to me. For me to survive and thrive in my life I had to step out of the comfort zone and learn how to face my fears and how to deal with all the uncertainty and the unpredictability of life. Stepping out of your comfort zone doesn’t happen overnight and it is hard work however the rewards you gain are priceless. You start living and experiencing life as it should be lived, with you in control. Your resilience and courage becomes the foundation that enable you to survive and thrive in life.

So how did I step out of my comfort zone? Well, here are 7 courageous actions that I did that helped me to make the decision to step out and stay out of my comfort zone, so that I could live my life with me in control!

1. Complete a 30 Day Challenge of Change

The purpose of this activity is to get you comfortable with change. The challenge also enables you to experience change in small steps and to start to modify the habits and behaviours that keep you locked in your comfort zone.

Every day for 30 days you will do either an everyday task differently or an activity that you have never done before. You will need to record the new activities each day and you can do this on a wall chart. It is important that this wall chart is visible to you and everyone else.

The 30 day challenge is not something you do quietly, you need to announce to everyone what you are doing.

I announced to my friends on FaceBook that I was doing the 30 day challenge of change and everyday I would post the new activity or event. This kept me accountable and meant that I had to complete my challenge as a lot of my friends were supporting and encouraging me.

The 30 day challenge gets you to push your boundaries and doing things you have always been too scared to do. Only you can challenge yourself to do the things that scare you. You don’t need to be scared all the time while you are doing this challenge however if you haven’t been scared at least 6 times during the 30 day challenge then you are wasting your time. You are not being courageous, you are been cautious and safe.

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2. List All Your Fears and Habits That Keep You in Your Comfort Zone

Write this list down on a piece of paper and place it where you can see it everyday. As you go through the 30 day challenge tick the fears and bad habits that you overcome every day of the challenge. You will be surprised how many fears and bad habits you can conquer in 30 days.

This activity helps you get your fears out of your head and on to a piece of paper where you now have control. You soon start to realise as you work through your 30 day challenge that it is only you that has the power to decide if you want to live your life ruled by your fears or not.

Get educated about you and what it is that you do and think that keeps you in your comfort zone. Figure out what you need to do to better manage these behaviours and habits that have control over you and how you live your life.

3.Start Using Your Power Of Choice

Remember living your life in your comfort zone is your choice. Only you have the power to change this and you do this by choosing to live your life differently. Your power of choice is a gift and it enables you to live your life with you in control. Your power of choice enables you to survive and thrive in life and that means you are living your life to it fullest.

Try to be more reflective in your decision making and learn how to trust yourself. The  big fear that limits your power of choice is your  fear of failure.  You  need to deal to this fear and understand that it is only through failure that one can learn and grow in life.

These 3 questions that helped me have more  confidence  about making choices and decisions in my life are

  1. What is the worst thing that will happen if I fail?
  2. Have I thought this through carefully or am I acting on impulse or emotion?
  3. In what ways would my life be better if I went ahead with this opportunity or goal?

4. Keep a Journal of Celebration

Celebrate your successes. Once you have completed the 30 day challenge don’t stop, keep pushing your boundaries. Living out of your comfort zone is a life long journey. Your journal is a great way for you to record and celebrate your successes.

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Keeping a journal is an important strategy to help you  maintain your motivation and desire to live your life to the fullest. Recording your journey in life and all your successes will help grow your  confidence and self belief. It is these two qualities in life that provide the fuel for to  keep  you going and to keep pushing  your boundaries.

5. Read Books About Change, Personal Growth and Managing Risk

Knowledge is powerful tool in life as it enables you  to change your life. I started reading books about personal growth and personal change. I also watched lots of Ted Talks about motivation, success, risk taking and failure.

The more I read and the more action I took to push my boundaries the more opportunities came my way. I also started meeting people who had been on their own personal journeys of change and I found their stories inspirational.

There are 3 events in ones life that create personal change. They are;

  1. An opportunity  comes your way that is unexpected – job promotion, inheritance or winning the lottery
  2. Personal Crises – an unexpected event that changes your life dramatically
  3. Choice – you proactive and choose to  make a decision to make changes in your life

I had a personal crises that  forced me to change my life and step  out of my comfort zone. It was tough but I survived and I know now  how to live my life to its fullest. I am not afraid of life and I am  definitely more courageous and resilient.

However if I had to choose an event that would enable me to live life out of my comfort zone I would go for Life  Event 3 – Choice.. Being proactive and using  my power of choice to make the changes I need to make in my life is a far less painful way for me to step out of my comfort zone than to deal with a personal crises.

Don’t wait for a personal crises to force you to change your life,use  your power of choice and act on it now. Take control of your life and choose to step out of your comfort zone so that you can truly live a life where you are surviving and thriving.

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6. Find Someone Who Has Done What You Want To Do With Life

Find someone who you admire, dead or alive that lives their life outside of their comfort zone. Get to know them either through reading books, watching movies or talking to them one on one. Find out everything about them, in fact stalk them (in a nice way) and copy exactly how they act, what they think and what they do that enables them to live their life outside of their comfort zone. Let them become your teacher and your mentor. They will show you how to be courageous and how you can live outside of your comfort zone forever!

7. Get Your Mind Body and Soul Aligned

Stepping out of your comfort zone requires desire, motivation and courage. Having your mind body and soul aligned builds your mental and physical stamina and resilience so that you can survive and thrive in life – No 7 is key to successfully keeping you out of your comfort zone forever.

Exercising regularly, eating well, getting lots of sleep and having time out for your mind to rest (being mindful) are activities that are key to you surviving and thriving in life. These activities strengthen your resilience and your courage and as a result living out of your comfort zone gets easier and easier to do.

So go use these 7 things to help you step out of your comfort zone. You won’t regret it because you truly will live your life the way it should be lived.

Good luck. I would love to hear how you are going stepping of your comfort zone and living a life that is real – the good, the great, the bad and the ugly!

More by this author

Kathryn Sandford

Career Resilience Coach passionate about supporting others to grow and thrive in a complex world.

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Last Updated on November 17, 2019

40 Amazing Date Ideas for Valentine’s Day

40 Amazing Date Ideas for Valentine’s Day

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, starry-eyed lovers worldwide are getting ready to celebrate their love and planning the perfect date for their partner. However, there are many loving, caring, and generally great people out there who simply can’t think of a single romantic thing to do, let alone create the ultimate Valentine’s Day experience for their loved one. If you are looking for some great date ideas that will put a smile on your partner’s face and melt their heart, then just keep on reading. I’ve got a pretty big list of choices for you. Here are some great ideas ranging from tried and true classics, to the fun and slightly unconventional.

1. Rom-coms marathon

This is a very basic yet highly romantic way of spending the day with your partner. Take a few days to prepare the right playlist and create a romantic atmosphere at home. You can order out some food, open a bottle of wine and cuddle up in front of the TV.

2. Recreate your first date

Rated pretty high on the “romantic gestures scale,” this is guaranteed to impress your significant other. It requires a good memory and a bit of work to make it just right, but it is well worth it. Walk down the same streets where you first kissed and have a couple of drinks in that old coffee shop where you had your first drinks together. Don’t be afraid to spend a bit extra and add a little romantic gift into the mix.

3. Cook for your loved one

Start researching good recipes for a romantic dinner for two, get the right ingredients and prepare a couple of practice dinners to make sure you’ve got your technique and presentation down pat. Cooking for someone can be a big turn on and you can create some incredible meals without spending too much money. Take it up a notch by dressing classy, decorating your dining room and presenting your partner with a printed menu.

4. Organize your very own ancient Greek party

Here’s another one of those creative date ideas for the stay-at-home couple. The ancient Greek private party can be a very fun and erotic experience. You can decorate by using big bowls full of grapes, spreading some white sheets all over the place, placing some plastic vines here and there, putting up a few posters depicting Greek parties and having plenty of wine lying around. Wear nothing but light sheets or costumes and channel some of that hot-blooded Greek spirit.

5. A romantic weekend getaway in the mountains

For those looking for a change of scenery and an escape from the busy city, there is nothing better than a quiet, romantic weekend in the mountains. There are plenty of fun activities like skiing that will keep you active. You can have fun making a snowman or engaging in a snowball fight, and, of course, there is plenty of privacy and great room service waiting for you back at your room.

6. Fun day at the shooting range

A bit unconventional but an incredibly fun and exciting date that will get your blood pumping and put a huge smile on your faces. Try out a number of guns and have a bit of a competition. Some outdoor ranges have fully automatic rifles, which are a blast to shoot.

7. Rent an expensive sports car for a day

Don’t be afraid to live large from time to time—even if you can’t afford the glamorous lifestyle of the stars, you can most definitely play pretend for a day. Put on some classy clothes and drive around town in a rented sports car. The quick acceleration and high speed are sure to provide an exhilarating experience.

8. Go on a shopping spree together

Very few things can elicit such a huge dopamine rush as a good old shopping spree. Get some new lingerie, pretty shoes, a nice shirt and tie, a couple of new video games or whatever else you need or want. This is a unique chance to bond, have fun and get some stuff that you’ve been waiting to buy for a while now.

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9. Hit the clubs

For all the party animals out there, one of the best date ideas is to go out drinking, dancing, and just generally enjoying the night life. Visit a few good clubs, then go to an after-party and keep that party spirit going for as long as you can.

10. Spend the day driving around the city and visiting new places

This one is geared towards couples who have been together for a year or two and want to experience a few new things together. Visit a few cool coffee places on the other side of town, check out interesting restaurants you’ve never been to, and consider going to see a play or having fun at a comedy club on open mic night.

11. Wine and chocolates at sunset

Pick out a romantic location, such as a camping spot on a hill overlooking the city or a balcony in a restaurant with a nice view, open a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates and wait for that perfect moment when the sky turns fiery red to embrace and share a passionate kiss.

12. Ice skating

There is something incredibly fun about ice skating that brings people closer together and just keeps you laughing (maybe it’s all the falling and clinging to the other person for dear life). You can have some great fun and then move on to a more private location for some alone time.

13. Body painting

Speaking of private locations and intimate moments, body painting allows you to spice things up back at your place and add a new element of fun to foreplay. You’ll need adequate body paints and some brushes and the rest is up to you. You can do tiger stripes, paint a t-shirt on your partner, or go for something more abstract—the choice is yours.

14. Model clothes for each other

This one goes well when combined with a shopping spree, but you can just get a bunch of your clothes—old and new—from the closet, set up a catwalk area and then try on different combinations. You can be stylish, funny or beautiful. It’s a great after-dinner show and a good way to transition into a more intimate atmosphere.

15. Dance the night away

If you and your significant other are relatively good dancers, or if you simply enjoy moving your body to the rhythm of the music, then a night at salsa club or similar venue is the perfect thing for you. Alternatively, you can set up dance floor at home, play your favorite music, have a few drinks and dance like there is no tomorrow.

16. Lock the doors, turn off the phones and have the whole house to yourselves

This one might seem a bit obvious and kind of redundant seeing as how I’ve already mentioned a bunch of stay-at-home date ideas that require this step as a prerequisite, but when I say, “Have the whole house to yourselves,” I literally mean turning the whole house into romantic stage where you can explore your fantasies. Decorate each room a bit differently, have a lot of snacks and drinks lying around, put a bunch of blankets and pillows on the floor and go from room to room throughout the day. You can start off with a steaming shower, have a romantic meal, then watch a movie cuddled up on the couch and eventually make your way to the bedroom.

17. Organize a nature walk

Being outside has many health benefits, but what you are going for is the beautiful view, seclusion, and the thrill of engaging in some erotic behavior out in the open. You can rent a cottage far from the city, bring some food and drinks, and explore the wilderness. This is nice way to spice things up a bit and get away from the loud and busy city life.

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18. Act out a fun scenario wearing costumes

Some role-playing may be just the thing you need to spice up your love life after a few years of being together, but it can be a very fun experience for new couples as well. Work on the scenario together (wounded soldier and nurse, a female cop arresting a robber, etc.), buy the right costumes and accessories beforehand and find a good setting. You could also rent a hotel room to add to the forbidden-fruit vibe.

19. Travel abroad

This takes a bit of planning in advance and may be a bit costly, but if you can afford it, there are very few things that can match a trip to France, Italy, Egypt, Turkey, Greece, or a number of other excellent locations.

20. Go on a hot-air balloon ride

These are very fun and romantic—you get an incredible view, get to experience the thrill of flying, and you’ve got enough room for a romantic dinner and some champagne. Just be sure to wear warm clothes, it can get pretty cold high up in the air.

21. A relaxing day at the spa

Treat your body, mind and senses to a relaxing day at the spa. You and your partner will feel fresh, comfortable and relaxed—a perfect date for the more serious couples who don’t get to spend as much time with each other as they’d like.

22. A trip down memory lane

This one is great for long-term couples who will benefit from reminiscing about all of their fondest memories together from the start of the relationship through to the present, reliving some of the most significant moments they shared.

23. Fun times at a karaoke bar

A great choice for couples celebrating their first Valentine’s Day together—it’s fairly informal and inexpensive, yet incredibly fun and allows for deeper bonding. Once you have a few drinks in your system and come to terms with the fact that you are making a complete fool of yourself, you’ll have the time of your life!

24. Helicopter tour of the city followed by dinner

A modern equivalent to the hot-air balloon ride, the helicopter tour is among the more reasonably priced date ideas and is incredibly romantic and exciting. After about half an hour or an hour of sightseeing you can finish off the upper-class experience by dining in a nice restaurant.

25. Horseback riding

Horseback riding is incredibly fun, especially if you’ve never done it before. And what girl doesn’t dream of a prince coming to take her on an adventure on his noble steed? It evokes a sense of nobility and is a very good bonding experience.

26. Plan a fun date night with other couples

Take a break and rent a cabin in the woods, go to a mountain resort, a couple’s retreat, or just organize a huge date night at someone’s place and hang out with other couples. This is a great option for couples who have spent at least one Valentine’s Day together and allows you to customize your experience to suit your needs. Also, you can always retire early and get some alone time with your partner if you so desire.

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27. Cocktail night

This can be done privately, or with other couples if you are organizing a group Valentine’s Day celebration at someone’s house. All you need is a bunch of different drinks, a few accessories like fruit and spices, and internet access to check out some cool recipes online. Try out all sorts of fun cocktails and mix some brand new ones on your own. Make it a fancy dress night for added fun.

28. Make reservations at an exclusive restaurant

A fairly old school move, except this time you can pick out a restaurant that serves a particular type of cuisine you’ve never tried before. Go for a place that has unusual menus and likes to make a show out of presenting the food, rather than just going for your regular “suits and monocles” type venue.

29. Go to a concert

There are a whole bunch of things happening around Valentine’s Day, so go online and check out what’s happening near you. You’ll surely be able to find tickets for a cool concert or some type of festival with live music.

30. Fancy night on the town

Buy some elegant new clothes, rent a limo for the night and go to a nice restaurant, followed by a jazz club or gallery exhibition. Walk tall, make a few sarcastic quips, and have a few laughs with your partner while letting your inner snob take charge for a few hours.

31. Take a tour of the historical and cultural sites of your city

For the cultured crowd and history buffs among us, a day spent learning about some of the local history and delving deeper into national culture is both incredibly fun and a great way to share a unique experience with a loved one. You’d be surprised to find just how much you don’t know about the place you live in.

32. Live out a James Bond film at a casino

A beautiful lady in a simple yet sensual, form-fitting, black dress, and a strong and handsome, if somewhat stern-looking man in a fine suit walk up to a roulette table with drinks in hand and place bets at random as they smile at each other seductively. This is a scenario most of us wish to play out, but rarely get a chance. It can be a bit costly, but this is one of the most incredibly adventurous and romantic date ideas.

33. Go bungee jumping

People in long-term relationships often talk about things like keeping a relationship fun and exciting, doing new things together, trusting each other and using aphrodisiacs. Well, bungee jumping is a fun, exhilarating activity you can both enjoy; it requires trust and the adrenaline rush you get from it is better than any aphrodisiac out there. Just saying, give it a shot and you won’t regret it.

34. Take a tour of a winery or brewery

Taking a tour like this can be a great opportunity to learn new things about wine or beer (or perhaps whiskey) and how it is made, while at the same time getting a chance to taste some excellent drinks and get a few bottles for later in the evening.

35. Make a fun music video

Meet up earlier in the day, take decent camera, and start shooting a music video. Rehearse the lyrics (you can even make up your own silly song), dress up, and start filming. You’ll have tons of fun doing it and you can edit the video later and have a cool memento.

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36. Play some sports

Some one-on-one basketball, a soccer match against another couple, a bit of tennis, or even something as simple as a table tennis tournament (make it fun by stripping off items of clothing when you lose a game). You can combine this with date idea #13 and paint team uniforms on each other and play in the nude.

37. Visit a club with live music

A great option for just about any couple—pick a club that has live performers (whether it’s jazz, rock or even a poetry reading) and dress up for the occasion. Be sure to make reservations in advance to avoid the Valentine’s Day rush, and focus on making your date feel comfortable.

38. Take skydiving lessons

Another adrenaline-filled date, skydiving is sure to get your heart racing like crazy and leave you with a goofy grin for the rest of the day. You can offset all the excitement by ending the day with a quiet dinner at home.

39. Go for some paintball

Playing war games is an excellent way to get your body moving, focus on some of that hand-eye-coordination, and engage your brain in coming up with tactical solutions in the heat of the moment. It is also a great bonding experience, adrenaline-fueled fun, and role-playing all wrapped into one. And when you get back home, you can always act out the wounded soldier scenario (see #18).

40. Fill the whole day with random fun activities

Just say no to plans, reservations and clichés—take your partner by the hand, have your credit card ready and just go out and have some fun. Bowling, followed by a drink at a coffee shop and then a romantic movie? Sure, why not? Going for lunch at a nice restaurant and then organizing a double-date game night? Go right ahead. Going for a long walk in the park, visiting a museum, followed by romantic meal at home and then going out to a club? Hey, who am I to say no? You can use some of the ideas from this article and mash them up together to create a fun-filled Valentine’s Day you’ll both remember.

There you go, a whole bunch of useful date ideas for all you loving couples out there. You can pick out any one of these, make some adjustments or even combine different options to create the perfect Valentine’s Day date for your significant other. Plan ahead, have fun and celebrate your love proudly.

Featured photo credit: Relevante design via unsplash.com

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