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Signs That You Seem Childish But You’re Actually Very Mature

Signs That You Seem Childish But You’re Actually Very Mature

Have you always been a rebel who was opposed to growing up? I have always been like this, and I still am, but this doesn’t mean that I remained a kid. There is a big difference between how people perceive you and how you really are as a person. You may appear childish to others due to some habits which are typical for immature people, but this doesn’t mean that you don’t take care of important things in your life.

This can have a negative effect on you. Why? Simply because you will start to think that it’s true. Furthermore, this may lead you to feel bad about yourself, thinking that you are worse than everybody else since you don’t seem to be growing up. Just stop. Don’t go down that road—it won’t do you any good. Some people are boring, they stop having fun at some point, and just because you like to fool around doesn’t mean that you are doing something wrong. Here is how your childish habits may actually be signs of maturity.

You admit to not knowing things

When someone admits that he or she doesn’t know simple things, people tend to think of them as immature. For example, if you admit things like not knowing how to turn on the washing machine, it does not mean that you are incompetent. One of the major steps towards improving as a person is to face your shortcomings, so that you can correct them in the future.

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You have the courage to do things that scare you

No matter if we are talking about riding a skateboard, taking martial arts courses, or asking the person you like out, you’ve got to have the guts to do it. Going for things in life and risking failure or rejection is much better than sitting in your comfort zone, watching your life pass by. This courage you have empowers you to progress in life and make changes that others are scared of.

You make quick decisions

To others, it seems like you don’t think when you make certain choices. In actual fact, you think faster than the rest, and that’s why you don’t need as much time to make a decision. Rather than thinking about the things you like, you focus on actually doing them, and this can give you an advantage at work or in other situations that require quick decision-making.

You disagree with your parents

Parents will always be parents. They like to meddle in our lives and tell us what to do even when we are fully grown. It is a common belief that, as we mature, our point of view starts to align with how our parents think. This is not true, and you prove this every time you make decisions that your parents dissaprove of. If every generation thought the same, we wouldn’t have evolved much as a civilisation.

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You admit you’ve been hurt in the past

Talking openly about your feelings is a healthy thing and it helps you deal with your past. Insecure people don’t like showing their human side and how fragile they are. By speaking openly about your hardships, you overcome baggage and become a more stable person who cannot be shaken by similar things.

You enjoy sitting home and watching your favorite TV shows

After a hard day at work, the thing you like doing the most is to prepare some tasty food and binge watch your favorite TV shows. You’ve outgrown partying all the time and you now enjoy partying at home with a popular epic fantasy series rather than with people. Who needs people when you have Game of Thrones, right?

You like sleeping

This is one of the things on which you disagree with your parents, and even your friends. You like to go to sleep when you feel like it. Even though people think you are lazy, you know that getting a good night’s sleep is essential for being fresh and ready for each new day. There is no point in staying awake if you are incapable of performing the simplest of tasks.

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You go crazy when you party

You don’t go out very often, since you like to take a good nap or watch TV, but when you do, you go out with style. In a way, you try to make up for everything you’ve been missing out on during your night out and do crazy things, meet new people, drink and dance, even if you don’t really know how to do it. You simply don’t care! The important thing is that you’ve fulfilled the need to do meaningless things and you’ve recharged your batteries for the next week.

You speak honestly

Beating around the bush is not your favorite thing and you like to tell it like it is. If you dislike someone, you will let them know, because there is no need for pretending. Adults don’t waste time on things that they don’t like, and that’s why being honest with others and yourself gets you where you want to be.

You try to have fun as much as you can

When you have some free time on your hands, you like to make the most of it. You enjoy doing things you’ve always dreamed of doing and have no shame when it comes to trying something new. Others may think you are crazy, but you don’t care. Being mature doesn’t mean that you have to be old, and why should you care if others don’t know how to enjoy life?

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These are just a few of the significant signs that you are probably more mature than you (and others!) might think. Being mature is very important for making progress in your career, improving your life skills, and having meaningful relationships. However, I will always nurture the child in me. Sometimes, it’s better to have a less serious outlook on life, and through this perspective, you can even come up with positive solutions to serious issues.

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Ivan Dimitrijevic

Ivan is the CEO and founder of a digital marketing company. He has years of experiences in team management, entrepreneurship and productivity.

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Last Updated on January 15, 2021

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

Posture

First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

  • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
  • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
  • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
  • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

Facial Expressions

Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

  • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
  • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
  • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

2. Relax Your Face

New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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3. Improve Your Eye Contact

Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

3. Smile More

There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

4. Hand Gestures

Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

5. Enhance Your Handshake

In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

“Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

Final Takeaways

Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

Reference

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