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36 weeks Pregnant Must Know: The 3 Stages Of Labour

36 weeks Pregnant Must Know: The 3 Stages Of Labour

At 36 weeks pregnant you will be very excited about the arrival of your new baby. This is a very special time for you and your baby.

It’s surprising to hear that this little baby has now grown to the size of a honey-due melon and could possibly weigh up to six pounds. This little bundle of fun could survive outside the womb, if you went into labour at 36 weeks pregnant – but it’s best to give them every chance to thrive and grow to full term at 40 weeks.

By now you have most likely stocked up on all of the necessary baby equipment – ready for the baby’s arrival home from the hospital. But lets not forget that you have a major life event to prepare for and that is the labour.

If this is your first time to have a baby, you will have many questions about labour. Read on to get a closer look at the three stages of labour.

36 Weeks Pregnant Labour Guide

First Stage of Labour

There are three phases to the first stage of labour early labour, active labour and transition.

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1. Early Labour

It can take time for the first stage of labour to really take off. In this stage the cervix dilates to 3-4cm and it changes shape – from a long tube to a much shorter one. Braxton Hicks or pregnancy cramps can sometimes be mistaken for labour contractions but you will know if it’s the real thing if the pains continue.

The contractions shouldn’t be too painful at this point and it is fine for you to stay at home and watch a movie or preferably try to get some sleep.

Early labour can vary in length from one woman to the next. For a first baby it usually takes quite a bit longer. For some women it can be a full day before they feel the need to go to hospital while for others it can be just a few hours.

Women who have had previous labours are usually quite calm at this point if not a bit excited, however first time mums who do not have the same experience to refer to often feel nervous during the first stage of labour. Labour is difficult, there is no doubt but is is also beautiful so stay focused on the end result and pamper yourself with nice treats.

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2. Active Labour

Your cervix will dilate from 4cm all the way up to 8cm during this phase of labour. The contractions will be much stronger, longer and will come more steadily.

You will be safe enough calling the hospital to say you’re on the way when your contractions are five minutes apart for one hour. Towards the end of this phase the baby begins to descend and you can assure yourself that you will see it soon.

For some women it is possible that the contractions will come as often as every  2-3 mins at this stage. You won’t be able to have a conversation throughout these contractions. Instead you will be focusing on your breathing. You may also be using pain medication at this point if you feel that you need it.

This stage can take up to 8 hours but maybe much less for a woman who has given birth before. The good news is that time really flies when you are focusing on you labour management. I would know as a mother of four. You really don’t notice the time passing during active labour and the birth itself.

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3. Transition

At the end of the active phase you will go through what is referred to as the transition phase. This is when the cervix moves from 8-10cm. There is no doubt this is the most difficult part of labour. You may feel that you need to push but the cervix isn’t dilated enough so you will be told not to.

Don’t worry if you feel nauseous or like opening your bowels, this is all normal and will pass soon. Your baby is making it’s way closer to you with every contraction. Just keep focusing on their little face and it will get you through this tough stage.

Second Stage of Labour

Finally, you get to 10cm. Now you get to push. Follow the directions of the doctor or midwife and only push as much as they say. If they say to push gently then just do as they ask and push gently. This will really help to avoid tearing and stitches later.

Sometimes referred to as the “pushing stage” this part of labour is calmer as a rule. The contractions don’t come as often and in some hospitals women are given a break at this point – to rest a little before they start to push.

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Sometimes the baby is still quite high up in the pelvis and the pressure to push is not so great. However the baby will move down a little more with each contraction and eventually the head will start to crown. You will see with a mirror the baby’s scalp peeping out of your vagina. It can be hard to believe they are so close.

The baby’s descent may be rapid or it may be slower with a first baby. Either way, find a comfortable position where you can push properly – bearing down as if you were doing a number 2!

This stage can take longer for women who have had an epidural as they don’t feel the same pressure to push. Sometimes babies are delivered in this stage in less than a half an hour while for others it can take more than an hour.

Trust in the experts and follow their directions and your baby will eventually make it’s way out, hopefully head first, then shoulders and finally their body.

Third Stage of Labour

At this point your baby will be well wrapped up and in your arms. You won’t care very much about the third stage of labour but the midwife or doctor will work gently asking you to push out the placenta. This won’t take long – just a few minutes. It’s not really painful and it won’t bother you at all.

You will probably be feeling elated at having your new baby in your arms – checking their fingers and toes – trying to figure out who they look like.

Your work is finally done. That is your labour is done but the real work is only getting started! You’ll have to check back in with me for more tips on what to do next.

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Published on January 30, 2019

How to Support a Working Mother as a Working Father

How to Support a Working Mother as a Working Father

In roughly 60 percent of two-parent households with children under the age of 18, both parents work full time. But who takes time off work when the kids are sick in your house? And if you are a manager, how do you react when a man says he needs time to take his baby to the pediatrician?

The sad truth is, the default in many companies and families is to value the man’s work over the woman’s—even when there is no significant difference in their professional obligations or compensation. This translates into stereotypes in the workplace that women are the primary caregivers, which can negatively impact women’s success on the job and their upward mobility.

According to a Pew Research Center analysis of long-term time-use data (1965–2011), fathers in dual-income couples devote significantly less time than mothers do to child care.[1] Dads are doing more than twice as much housework as they used to (from an average of about four hours per week to about 10 hours), but there is still a significant imbalance.

This is not just an issue between spouses; it’s a workplace culture issue. In many offices, it is still taboo for dads to openly express that they have family obligations that need their attention. In contrast, the assumption that moms will be on the front lines of any family crisis is one that runs deep.

Consider an example from my company. A few years back, one of our team members joined us for an off-site meeting soon after returning from maternity leave. Not even two hours into her trip, her husband called to say that the baby had been crying nonstop. While there was little our colleague could practically do to help with the situation, this call was clearly unsettling, and the result was that her attention was divided for the rest of an important business dinner.

This was her first night away since the baby’s birth, and I know that her spouse had already been on several business trips before this event. Yet, I doubt she called him during his conferences to ask child-care questions. Like so many moms everywhere, she was expected to figure things out on her own.

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The numbers show that this story is far from the exception. In another Pew survey, 47 percent of dual-income parents agreed that the moms take on more of the work when a child gets sick.[2] In addition, 39 percent of working mothers said they had taken a significant amount of time off from work to care for their child compared to just 24 percent of working fathers. Mothers are also more likely than fathers (27 percent to 10 percent) to say they had quit their job at some point for family reasons.

Before any amazing stay-at-home-dads post an angry rebuttal comment, I want to be very clear that I am not judging how families choose to divide and conquer their personal and professional responsibilities; that’s 100 percent their prerogative. Rather, I am taking aim at the culture of inequity that persists even when spouses have similar or identical professional responsibilities. This is an important issue for all of us because we are leaving untapped business and human potential on the table.

What’s more, I think my fellow men can do a lot about this. For those out there who still privately think that being a good dad just means helping out mom, it’s time to man up. Stop expecting working partners—who have similar professional responsibilities—to bear the majority of the child-care responsibilities as well.

Consider these ways to support your working spouse:

1. Have higher expectations for yourself as a father; you are a parent, not a babysitter.

Know who your pediatrician is and how to reach him or her. Have a back-up plan for transportation and emergency coverage.

Don’t simply expect your partner to manage all these invisible tasks on her own. Parenting takes effort and preparation for the unexpected.

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As in other areas of life, the way to build confidence is to learn by doing. Moms aren’t born knowing how to do this stuff any more than dads are.

2. Treat your partner the way you’d want to be treated.

I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve heard a man on a business trip say to his wife on a call something to the effect of, “I am in the middle of a meeting. What do you want me to do about it?”

However, when the tables are turned, men often make that same call at the first sign of trouble.

Distractions like this make it difficult to focus and engage with work, which perpetuates the stereotype that working moms aren’t sufficiently committed.

When you’re in charge of the kids, do what she would do: Figure it out.

3. When you need to take care of your kids, don’t make an excuse that revolves around your partner’s availability.

This implies that the children are her first priority and your second.

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I admit I have been guilty in the past of telling clients, “I have the kids today because my wife had something she could not move.” What I should have said was, “I’m taking care of my kids today.”

Why is it so hard for men to admit they have personal responsibilities? Remember that you are setting an example for your sons and daughters, and do the right thing.

4. As a manager, be supportive of both your male and female colleagues when unexpected situations arise at home.

No one likes or wants disruptions, but life happens, and everyone will face a day when the troubling phone call comes from his sitter, her school nurse, or even elderly parents.

Accommodating personal needs is not a sign of weakness as a leader. Employees will be more likely to do great work if they know that you care about their personal obligations and family—and show them that you care about your own.

5. Don’t keep score or track time.

At home, it’s juvenile to get into debates about who last changed a diaper or did the dishes; everyone needs to contribute, but the big picture is what matters. Is everyone healthy and getting enough sleep? Are you enjoying each other’s company?

In business, too, avoid the trap of punching a clock. The focus should be on outcomes and performance rather than effort and inputs. That’s the way to maintain momentum toward overall goals.

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The Bottom Line

To be clear, I recognize that a great many working dads are doing a terrific job both on the home front and in their professional lives. My concern is that these standouts often aren’t visible to their colleagues; they intentionally or inadvertently let their work as parents fly under the radar. Dads need to be open and honest about family responsibilities to change perceptions in the workplace.

The question “How do you balance it all?” should not be something that’s just asked of women. Frankly, no one can answer that question. Juggling a career and parental responsibilities is tough. At times, really tough.

But it’s something that more parents should be doing together, as a team. This can be a real bonus for the couple relationship as well, because nothing gets in the way of good partnership faster than feelings of inequity.

On the plus side, I can tell you that parenting skills really do get better with practice—and that’s great for people of both sexes. I think our cultural expectations that women are the “nurturers” and men are the “providers” needs to evolve. Expanding these definitions will open the doors to richer contributions from everyone, because women can and should be both—and so should men.

Featured photo credit: NeONBRAND via unsplash.com

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