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Realizing the Differences Between Love And True Love

Realizing the Differences Between Love And True Love

Sometimes true love finds you when you least expect it; other times, you look everywhere for it, and it cannot be found. Whether it be now or in the future, you will find yourself in a romantic relationship. When you are in this relationship, you may question if it is love, infatuation, lust, or true love. How are you supposed to know the difference? Here are five ways to distinguish love from true love.

1. With True Love, You Don’t Ask Others For Their Approval. With Love, You Do.

You don’t need to ask those close to you what they think of your love interest or your relationship. You don’t need reassurance because you already know. When you are infatuated or falling in love with a person you may question how they really feel, or even, how you really feel. You might feel the need to discuss all your fears and thoughts with others to get their input on your relationship. When you find true love, you won’t have those questions or need that reassurance. You will feel comfortable in how you feel and you won’t feel the need to analyze it.

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2. With True Love, You Truly Like Each Other. With Love, You Might Like Them In A More Superficial Way

When you are in love or in lust, the pure physical attraction can be so amazing that you don’t really stop and think if you actually like the person. True love is lasting and it is really important to like the person in and out of the bedroom. Physical attraction is important, but at the end of the day you want to like the person you are sharing your life with. And, of course, you want to know they like you as well.

3. With True Love, You Trust Each Other. With Love, There Can Be Doubts.

When you find true love, you also find trust. You don’t worry your partner will be disloyal, and you know you won’t as well. You know you have each other’s back. You trust you will be there for each other. Just as you know a best friend or close family member wouldn’t lie to you or treat you badly, you know your true love wouldn’t do that either. You also know you wouldn’t lie, cheat, or mistreat your true love. There is mutual trust, affection, and honesty.

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4. With True Love, Life Becomes Richer. With Love, It Can Become Harder.

True love enriches your life. Your life should become easier, not harder. Relationships built on lust and infatuation can be thrilling, exciting, and time consuming at the same time. The constant push and pull of this kind of love can make life rockier. There is a steadiness, comfort, and assurance that comes from finding your true love. Your life is fuller, more wonderful with this person in it.

5. With True Love, You Picture a Future Together. With Love, You’re Not Quite Sure.

Sometimes it is easy to picture a life together based on your unrealistic expectations or your idealistic way of viewing things. If you try hard enough, you can kind of see how you might have a future together. Or, you might be in love or infatuated with someone and thinking of a future together scares you. When you find true love, it feels natural to picture a future together. You can’t imagine not being together. You know this is the person you want by your side as you go through life.

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When you find true love, it feels right. There is a certainty that resides in you. You don’t feel the need to talk about your relationship with others to get their feedback. You truly enjoy each other’s company. You honestly like the other person, and they like you. There is mutual trust. Your life becomes better, not harder. It’s not hard to picture a future together. You can’t imagine a life without this person in it. You realize that true love doesn’t take time, but it stands the test of time.

Featured photo credit: True Love(r)/Alex Cheek via flickr.com

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Tomi Rues

Adjunct college teacher, notebook/journal designer, author

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Last Updated on December 2, 2018

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience

When giving a presentation or speech, you have to engage your audience effectively in order to truly get your point across. Unlike a written editorial or newsletter, your speech is fleeting; once you’ve said everything you set out to say, you don’t get a second chance to have your voice heard in that specific arena.

You need to make sure your audience hangs on to every word you say, from your introduction to your wrap-up. You can do so by:

1. Connecting them with each other

Picture your typical rock concert. What’s the first thing the singer says to the crowd after jumping out on stage? “Hello (insert city name here)!” Just acknowledging that he’s coherent enough to know where he is is enough for the audience to go wild and get into the show.

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It makes each individual feel as if they’re a part of something bigger. The same goes for any public speaking event. When an audience hears, “You’re all here because you care deeply about wildlife preservation,” it gives them a sense that they’re not just there to listen, but they’re there to connect with the like-minded people all around them.

2. Connect with their emotions

Speakers always try to get their audience emotionally involved in whatever topic they’re discussing. There are a variety of ways in which to do this, such as using statistics, stories, pictures or videos that really show the importance of the topic at hand.

For example, showing pictures of the aftermath of an accident related to drunk driving will certainly send a specific message to an audience of teenagers and young adults. While doing so might be emotionally nerve-racking to the crowd, it may be necessary to get your point across and engage them fully.

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3. Keep going back to the beginning

Revisit your theme throughout your presentation. Although you should give your audience the credit they deserve and know that they can follow along, linking back to your initial thesis can act as a subconscious reminder of why what you’re currently telling them is important.

On the other hand, if you simply mention your theme or the point of your speech at the beginning and never mention it again, it gives your audience the impression that it’s not really that important.

4. Link to your audience’s motivation

After you’ve acknowledged your audience’s common interests in being present, discuss their motivation for being there. Be specific. Using the previous example, if your audience clearly cares about wildlife preservation, discuss what can be done to help save endangered species’ from extinction.

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Don’t just give them cold, hard facts; use the facts to make a point that they can use to better themselves or the world in some way.

5. Entertain them

While not all speeches or presentations are meant to be entertaining in a comedic way, audiences will become thoroughly engaged in anecdotes that relate to the overall theme of the speech. We discussed appealing to emotions, and that’s exactly what a speaker sets out to do when he tells a story from his past or that of a well-known historical figure.

Speakers usually tell more than one story in order to show that the first one they told isn’t simply an anomaly, and that whatever outcome they’re attempting to prove will consistently reoccur, given certain circumstances.

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6. Appeal to loyalty

Just like the musician mentioning the town he’s playing in will get the audience ready to rock, speakers need to appeal to their audience’s loyalty to their country, company, product or cause. Show them how important it is that they’re present and listening to your speech by making your words hit home to each individual.

In doing so, the members of your audience will feel as if you’re speaking directly to them while you’re addressing the entire crowd.

7. Tell them the benefits of the presentation

Early on in your presentation, you should tell your audience exactly what they’ll learn, and exactly how they’ll learn it. Don’t expect them to listen if they don’t have clear-cut information to listen for. On the other hand, if they know what to listen for, they’ll be more apt to stay engaged throughout your entire presentation so they don’t miss anything.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm4.staticflickr.com

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