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6 Ways to Live Life on Your Own Terms

6 Ways to Live Life on Your Own Terms

If you’ve ever loaded up your Facebook feed and immediately gotten jealous of some random acquaintance from high school after seeing pictures of their vacation to Cancun, you’re not alone. We’re inundated on a daily basis with stories about how absolutely incredible other people’s lives are, while we’re left sitting in our tiny cubicle wondering when our time will come. I’m not even going to get into the fact that those other people live just as boring a life as you do; they just highlight the three days of vacation they get a year to make their lives seem a bit more interesting.

Anyway, the point is, you shouldn’t be comparing your life to others. The only way you’ll get where you want to be is if you live life on your own terms. And you can start by:

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1. Staying out of other people’s business

It’s human nature for us to want to be accepted and loved by everyone around us. It’s no surprise we’re constantly thinking the grass is greener on the other side. But the truth is, your grass is just as green as it needs to be.

Okay, enough with the metaphors. If you want to be free to live your life your way, you have to allow others to live their lives their way. There’s no reason to get involved in anyone’s life but your own.

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2. Staying away from toxic people

Then there are the people who make it a point to get into your business whenever they can. They’re the ones constantly pointing out faults in your ideas at work, or the so-called friends who try to bring you down because they hate seeing others succeed. Whether consciously or not, these people are incredibly controlling, and will do their best to make sure you live your own life on their terms. Ditch them as soon as possible.

3. Using your gifts to your advantage

Everyone in this world has a talent for something. Unfortunately, we often get so caught up in our day-to-day lives that our talents end up going to waste. Whether you’re a musician who has taken a day job as a mechanic to make ends meet, or college graduate who took a job as a barista until “something better comes along,” don’t let your skills go completely to waste. The last thing you want to do is give up on your true calling.

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4. Not working for external rewards

Money, money, money. It’s what keeps us all going, isn’t it? But does it really make you happy? If you want to live life on your own terms, you have to stop thinking of your worth in terms of how much you make. This goes for the poorest of the poor, and the richest of the rich. Some of the least monetarily successful people I know are the most enlightened; they’ve traveled the world and have thousands of stories to tell. On the other hand, some of the more well off individuals I’ve met live only to work and make more money, as if a six-digit number in their bank account will make them feel better on their deathbed.

If you want a fulfilling life, look inward. Being intrinsically motivated allows you to seek out what it is you truly want to get out of life, and make the absolute most of it each and every day.

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5. Letting your work speak for you

Going along with being intrinsically motivated, you should never boast about your accomplishments and achievements. If you’re goal is to live on your own terms, what good is telling others how great you are? In fact, it’s usually the individuals who hide behind titles, degrees, and other accomplishments that are the most insecure about who they are and what they’re capable of. You may be proud of all that you’ve done in life, but never let your accomplishments make you feel as if you’re superior to anyone else in any way.

6. Not holding yourself back

So many of us have a tendency to hesitate when faced with a difficult task or decision. While it’s definitely important to analyze situations carefully before taking any drastic measures, you don’t want to be so fearful that you don’t make a move at all. Remove any doubts you might have about your abilities. Be confident in your capacity to weather any storm that comes your way. You’ve made it this far, haven’t you?

Featured photo credit: A Pause for Contemplation, on Top of the World, Machu Picchu / Geraint Rowland via farm9.staticflickr.com

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Matt Duczeminski

A passionate writer who shares lifestlye tips on Lifehack

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Last Updated on March 23, 2021

Manage Your Energy so You Can Manage Your Time

Manage Your Energy so You Can Manage Your Time

One of the greatest ironies of this age is that while various gadgets like smartphones and netbooks allow you to multitask, it seems that you never manage to get things done. You are caught in the busyness trap. There’s just too much work to do in one day that sometimes you end up exhausted with half-finished tasks.

The problem lies in how to keep our energy level high to ensure that you finish at least one of your most important tasks for the day. There’s just not enough hours in a day and it’s not possible to be productive the whole time.

You need more than time management. You need energy management

1. Dispel the idea that you need to be a “morning person” to be productive

How many times have you heard (or read) this advice – wake up early so that you can do all the tasks at hand. There’s nothing wrong with that advice. It’s actually reeks of good common sense – start early, finish early. The thing is that technique alone won’t work with everyone. Especially not with people who are not morning larks.

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I should know because I was once deluded with the idea that I will be more productive if I get out of bed by 6 a.m. Like most of you Lifehackers, I’m always on the lookout for productivity hacks because I have a lot of things in my plate. I’m working full time as an editor for a news agency, while at the same time tending to my side business as a content marketing strategist. I’m also a travel blogger and oh yeah, I forgot, I also have a life.

I read a lot of productivity books and blogs looking for ways to make the most of my 24 hours. Most stories on productivity stress waking up early. So I did – and I was a major failure in that department – both in waking up early and finishing early.

2. Determine your “peak hours”

Energy management begins with looking for your most productive hours in a day. Getting attuned to your body clock won’t happen instantly but there’s a way around it.

Monitor your working habits for one week and list down the time when you managed to do the most work. Take note also of what you feel during those hours – do you feel energized or lethargic? Monitor this and you will find a pattern later on.

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My experiment with being a morning lark proved that ignoring my body clock and just doing it by disciplining myself to wake up before 8 a.m. will push me to be more productive. I thought that by writing blog posts and other reports in the morning that I would be finished by noon and use my lunch break for a quick gym session. That never happened. I was sleepy, distracted and couldn’t write jack before 10 a.m.

In fact that was one experiment that I shouldn’t have tried because I should know better. After all, I’ve been writing for a living for the last 15 years, and I have observed time and again that I write more –and better – in the afternoon and in evenings after supper. I’m a night owl. I might as well, accept it and work around it.

Just recently, I was so fired up by a certain idea that – even if I’m back home tired from work – I took out my netbook, wrote and published a 600-word blog post by 11 p.m. This is a bit extreme and one of my rare outbursts of energy, but it works for me.

3. Block those high-energy hours

Once you have a sense of that high-energy time, you can then mold your schedule so that your other less important tasks will be scheduled either before or after this designated productive time.

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Block them out in your calendar and use the high-energy hours for your high priority tasks – especially those that require more of your mental energy and focus. You also need to use these hours to any task that will bring you closer to you life’s goal.

If you are a morning person, you might want to schedule most business meetings before lunch time as it’s important to keep your mind sharp and focused. But nothing is set in stone. Sometimes you have to sacrifice those productive hours to attend to other personal stuff – like if you or your family members are sick or if you have to attend your son’s graduation.

That said, just remember to keep those productive times on your calendar. You may allow for some exemptions but stick to that schedule as much as possible.

There’s no right or wrong way of using this energy management technique because everything depends on your own personal circumstances. What you need to remember is that you have to accept what works for you – and not what other productivity gurus say you should do.

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Understanding your own body clock is the key to time management. Without it, you end up exhausted chasing a never-ending cycle of tasks and frustrations.

Featured photo credit: Collin Hardy via unsplash.com

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