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7 Forms of Real Wealth that Everyone Should Build to Lead a Meaningful Life

7 Forms of Real Wealth that Everyone Should Build to Lead a Meaningful Life

“Some people are so poor, all they have is money.” – Patrick Meagher

Wealth is about so much more than money. Yes, money can give you opportunities, no doubt about that, but there’s so much more to a meaningful life than just making an income.

Here are 7 forms of real wealth to build to lead a rich life and build real wealth.

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1. Authenticity

It can be difficult to be completely genuine, especially when there are pressures from society to fit your personality and life into a little predetermined box. You can have a truly meaningful life when you have the bravery to truly be yourself. You are one-of-a-kind. Act like it.

2. Wholehearted Relationships

One of the best parts of life is developing strong, loving relationships with your life partner, family members, and friends. Having relationships where you can be honest and vulnerable and are loved unconditionally is one of the most awesome things to experience. Connection with others makes life amazing.

3. Courage to Find and Do the Work You Love

If you feel stuck and frustrated at work, chances are things aren’t going to magically improve for you. Think ahead and imagine your life if you stay at your current job for 10 more years. Does that make you feel excited? If so, awesome. If it makes you feel sick, start taking steps today to find work you love.

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Start becoming a self-expert. Learn everything you can about what excites you, what you can’t stand, what kind of schedule you want, and what kind of impact you want to make on the world.

Take time to find your passion – the thing that completely ignites you – and do more of it. By living passionately, you will inspire others. You will give the people around you hope and permission to also do work they love, and this ripple effect will change the world.

4. Focus

Part of living a meaningful life is focusing. Streamlining your schedule and getting rid of the unimportant junk that sucks your time is important. When you spend your time doing what you love, and get rid of meaningless activities, your life becomes more worthwhile.

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2014 study found that the average adult ages 35-49 watches more than 33 hours of TV per week. That’s almost a full-time job’s worth of TV every single week. Investing some (or all) of that time into doing something you love can drastically improve your life satisfaction.

5. A Long List of Places You Have Visited

“The world is a book, and those who don’t travel only read one page.” – Augustine of Hippo. I absolutely love to travel. It makes me feel incredibly alive. Getting to see amazing places and meet people from a wide variety of backgrounds and cultures enriches your life.

6. A Healthy Mind and Body

Having a healthy mind, free from chronic negativity and void of constant destructive thoughts, is one of the keys to a happy life. Having a healthy body is also incredibly helpful. Your body is your vehicle to carry you on all kinds of awesome adventures. We are only given one body in our lifetime. This world is a huge, amazing place to explore, and taking care of your body allows you to do many more activities.

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7. A Meaningful Legacy

Creating something that lasts beyond your lifetime is a very important life stage, according to psychoanalyst Erik Erikson’s theory of psycho-social development. There are millions of options of things you can do to leave a lasting impact on the world. Giving back to the world and building a meaningful legacy is very fulfilling. Think about what you want your footprint to be on this earth, and leave this world a better place because you were here.

Your time here is limited. Be intentional about how you’re spending your time, and who you’re spending it with. There is so much more to a good life than collecting money.

Featured photo credit: Laughing at the Beach / Craig Cochrane via flickr.com

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Dr. Kerry Petsinger

Entrepreneur, Mindset & Performance Coach, & Doctor of Physical Therapy

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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