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6 Techniques for Making Interesting Friends

6 Techniques for Making Interesting Friends

People regularly ask me how I end up crossing paths with so many interesting people, and for a long time I didn’t really know why the gods have seen fit to bless me in this way. I’m a pretty shy guy and I usually keep too myself. And yet I can say that I have close friends on four continents who I can always count and and who can always count on me. Here are six of the techniques that have allowed me to have struck up friendships all over the globe.

1. Have a Passion

One thing that has proved to be invaluable to me in making friends across all demographics has been my love for heavy metal and radical leftist politics. The point is not that being into loud guitars and anarchism makes you more likely to make friends but that I have a passion and this allows me to reach across any boundaries and speak to people. Through these passions, I’ve been able to become close friends with conservative Catholics as well as Neo-Buddhist yoga instructors.

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The reason this works is that passions allow people to get a grasp on who you are. My interests are pretty out there. But at least they are readily apparent and people can latch on to them and talk to you about it. Being able to talk about them with a fire in your eyes makes you seem approachable and interesting – the kind of person who will attract other interesting individuals. This ties into our next point nicely.

2. Be a Person of Depth

The people who seem to make the most lasting friends while traveling or at parties tend to have a degree of introspection and self-awareness that allows their interests to come to the forefront. These people look for others like them – people who don’t want to get lost in daily superficiality but instead talk about what they love. Now this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t watch TV or play video games or whatever – but simply that you need to be careful in how you spend your time.

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One of my mentors, once said to me “The older you get, in my experience, the less time you have for the friends that you’ve got and the less friends you end up having. The friends that I’ve kept are the most interesting people they love broadening their horizons and learning things.” I think this is a solid maxim for maintaining friendships simply because it shows that maturity and growth are key aspects you’re going to want to have if you want interesting friends. And after all – if you’re not contributing anything to the friendship then why would they want to hang out with you?

3. Start the Conversation

This one is a little bit hard because like I said in the intro – I’m a shy guy and I’m sure some of you reading this are shy too. You need to be ready to chat with people about their interests, their lives, and their passions at any given time. It’s only by picking people apart that you can find out if they’re the kind of people you want to hang out with. If you don’t bother to start a conversation then you’ve lost before you’ve even started.

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One way I’ve found that an reliably kick off a conversation is a compliment or a question about someones appearance or behavior. I’ve started great chats by asking someone about the book they’re reading or asking what beard oil they use (I’m a metal dude – beard oil chit chat is a thing).

4. Ask Others About Their Lives

In his incredibly influential text How To Win Friends And Influence People, Dale Carnegie talks about how people respond well not just to genuine enthusiasm but also to questions and smiles. If you continue to guide people along and ask them about their lives they will almost always respond positively and have interesting things to share.

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See – other peoples interests are interesting to them for a reason – and in most cases they will probably end up interesting you too. By inquiring about interests I’ve gotten to learn all sorts of cool things – like with my friend Jeff who is a birder – the night I met him he spoke to me for two straight hours about the magic of birding. By the end of our conversation I too had a passion for birding and was excited for my first chance to go birding. The beauty of passion and interest is that it is easy to share and is never diminished by being spread around.

5. Realize We are All the Same

One thing that I’ve realized in my excursions with Playboy Bunnies, militant vegans, and acid eating high schoolers is that at the end of the day – we’re all pretty much the same. We might have diverse interests tastes and ideas, but we also have certain threads in common that make us all human. It’s understanding this that allows us to carry forward and live our fragile lives. The fact of the matter is that we need to work together to move forward and by understanding that our individual trials are reflected in the collective we are able to build towards something greater.

6. Be “Up for Whatever Happens!”

The second you get an invitation to engage in something be ready for whatever happens. Being open to new experiences and breaking your comfort zone is a key way to help make good friends throughout the world.

As hard as you try though some people you just won’t be able to crack and you won’t find what makes them interesting and that’s okay – they have other friends and you probably do too. Remember, the most interesting people are the ones who help to bring out the interesting bits of you – meaning that to be interesting is not just a personal trait but rather one that require some sort of intrapersonal interaction. Just remember that no matter what – this is how we guide each other forward and become better as humans.

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Last Updated on January 26, 2021

Science Says A Glass Of Red Wine Can Replace 1 Hour Exercising

Science Says A Glass Of Red Wine Can Replace 1 Hour Exercising

Are you a red wine drinker? What if I tell you sipping in a glass of wine can equate to an hour of exercise? Yup, it’s tried and tested. A new scientific study has just confirmed this wonderful news. So next time you hold a glass of Merlot, you can brag about one hour of hard workout. Rejoice, drinkers!

What the study found out

“I think resveratrol could help patient populations who want to exercise but are physically incapable. Resveratrol could mimic exercise for the more improve the benefits of the modest amount of exercise that they can do.”

(applauds)

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I’m not saying this, but the study’s principal investigator Jason Dyck who got it published in the Journal of Physiology in May.

In a statement to ScienceDaily, Dyck pointed out that resveratrol is your magic “natural compound” which lavishes you with the same benefits as you would earn from working out in the gym.

And where do you find it? Fruits, nuts and of course, red wine!

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Did I forget to mention Dyck also researched resveratrol can “enhance exercise training and performance”?

There are limits, of course

But, all is not gold as they say. If you’re a lady who likes to flaunt holding a glass of white wine in the club or simply a Chardonnay-lover,you have a bad (sad) news. The “one hour workout” formula only works with red wine, not non red wines. And don’t be mistaken and think you’ve managed 4 to 6 hours of workout sessions if you happen to gulp down a bottle of red wine.

And what can replace the golden lifetime benefits of exercise?Exercise is just as important as you age. Period! But hey, don’t be discouraged; look at the bigger picture here. A glass of red wine is not a bad deal after all!

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The health benefits of red wine

But just how beneficial is the red alcoholic beverage to your body? As we all know red wine is a healthier choice youc an make when boozing.

Let’s hear it from a registered dietitian. Leah Kaufman lists red wine as the “most calorie friendly” alcoholic beverage. Sure, you won’t mind adding up to a mere 100 calories per 5-ounce glass of red wine after you realize it contains antioxidants, lowers risk of heart disease and stroke, reduces risk of diabetes-related diseases, helps avoid formation of blood clots and lowers bad cholesterol level.

Wantmore? Wine could also replace your mouthwash because the flavan-3-ols in red wines can control the “bad bacteria” in your mouth.To add to that list of benefits, moderate wine drinking may be beneficial for your eyes too – a recent study mentions.

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Be aware of the risks, too

Having mentioned all the ‘goods’ about red wine, you cannot underplay the fact that it is still an alcohol, which isn’t the best stuff to pour into your body. What is excessive drinking going to do to your body? Know the risks and you should be a good drinker at the end of the day.

However, you don’t want to discard the red vino from your “right eating”regimen just because it stains your teeth blue. M-o-d-e-r-a-t-i-o-n. Did you read that? That’s the operative word when it comes to booze.

By the way, when chocolate is paired with wine, particularly red, they can bring you some exceptional benefits towards your health.But again, if you tend to go overboard and booze down bottles after bottles, you are up for the negative side of alcohol, and we all know what too much of sweetness (sugar) can do to our body (open invitation to diabetes and heart diseases if you aren’t aware).

Folks, the red grape beverage is certainly a good buy to have a good hour’s worth of cardio, provided you keep the ‘M’ word in mind. Cheers!

Featured photo credit: James Palinsad via flickr.com

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