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10 Signs You’re Really Special

10 Signs You’re Really Special

“The more you like yourself, the less you are like anyone else, which makes you unique.” – Walt Disney

The majority of us don’t have a very high self-esteem, but among us there are many special individuals who don’t even realize they are unique. The reason why this happens is that sometimes there may be people in our lives who underestimate us and make us feel worthless and insecure.

“As a teenager I was so insecure. I was the type of guy that never fitted in because he never dared to choose. I was convinced I had absolutely no talent at all. For nothing. And that thought took away all my ambition too.” – Johnny Depp

And as many of us, you probably are both very humble and incredibly special, but you still don’t know it. Just because you don’t save lives every day, you don’t have a huge self-confidence and you are not a doctor with five Masters and a PhD, it doesn’t mean that you’re not special. Being special could mean many things, like volunteering, helping your friends, listening to someone who feels alone, being a single mother or working all day long to pay the house mortgage.

Here are 10 signs that will reveal you how special you are.

1. You think there is always more to learn

“The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.” – Socrates

You are not arrogant like many people, and you’re interested in what happens around the world. Also, you are curious, and you always feel you should learn new things or improve some of your skills.

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You Are Special

    Image: Wisdom, study, triumph, possibility

    2. You are kind to others

    When you meet new people or when you are dealing with someone you already know, like your friends, or your colleagues, you tend to smile and be kind, just because there is no reason to be negative and treat others as if they were less important. Remember what I’m about to say and stick to it: never ever ever try to emulate people who never smile and are rude and disrespectful, just because they are powerful. Those people have huge unresolved personal issues. It’s the way you deal with others, being kind and positive, that makes you special and unique. So don’t try to change this.

    You Are Special

      Image: Be Kind

      3. You understand others’ feelings

      You don’t know how, but when someone talks about his personal life and experiences with you, sharing secrets or feelings with you, you perfectly understand the way they feel. Plus, you know you always need to go beyond the way others appear, to understand them. When someone tells you “I’m fine” you know there might be something more going on according to their voice or their facial expression, and you try to listen them, letting them talk about how they feel.

      You Are Special

        Image: Heart

        4. You enjoy music

        “One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.” – Bob Marley

        Your brain is very sensitive to music. Not only do you enjoy music, but you also need it in your daily routine, and it always evokes deep emotions in you. Those emotions may be good or bad, but they are strong.

        You Are Special

          Image: Music

          5. You listen

          “I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.” – Ernest Hemingway

          This is one of the most rare qualities in a person. Everyone tends to talk about himself or herself, for hours, regardless of what others have to say. Instead, you tend to listen a lot to others and you feel genuinely interested in their lives and in what they talk about.

          You Are Special

            Image: Listen My Friend

            6. You like to make others happy

            You feel good every time you manage to make someone happy, and you spend time thinking about many ways of making others smile or live a good moment. This might be, for example, a nice gift, a smile, a surprise or any kind of good deed.

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            You Are Special

              Image: Be kind

              7. You are positive

              “I truly believe that everything that we do and everyone that we meet is put in our path for a purpose. There are no accidents; we’re all teachers – if we’re willing to pay attention to the lessons we learn, trust our positive instincts and not be afraid to take risks or wait for some miracle to come knocking at our door.” – Marla Gibbs

              Not only do you have a positive attitude towards life and challenges, but you also try to transmit your good mindset to others. You usually don’t have prejudices and always think people are basically good. As a result, this could hurt you sometimes, and you have to be careful, but it’s the way you are.

              You Are Special

                Image: TheSeeds4Life

                8. You have goals

                You know exactly what you want from yourself, and you have intelligently planned your goals. You take action in your life, and you know where you want to go. Also, you don’t let others discourage you.

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                You Are Special

                  Image: It’s A Goal

                  9. You dream

                  This means that you are ambitious, something that gives you the power to boost your productivity and motivation to go through your challenges. You don’t let obstacles stop you, you don’t let anything intimidate you, and you think big even when some people try to confuse or scare you.

                  You Are Special

                    Image: Dreaming

                    10. You like to travel and learn from other cultures

                    “Travel is the only thing you buy that makes you richer” – Unknown

                    You believe in the power of multiculturalism, you are curious about other countries, other architectures and other ways of life. You give yourself the gift of learning from other cultures because you know how much this can make you richer. You like to interact with people with different experiences of life, from other societies, religions, and civilizations, and you are happy to share your culture with them as well.

                    You Are Special

                      Image: Monument to Multiculturalism by Francesco Perilli

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                      Featured photo credit: A Dream Within A Dream via flickr.com

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                      Sira Masetti

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                      Last Updated on September 18, 2020

                      13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

                      13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

                      For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

                      “We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

                      “It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

                      Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

                      You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

                      Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

                      1. Take a step back and evaluate

                      When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

                      1. What is the problem?
                      2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
                      3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
                      4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
                      5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

                      Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

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                      2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

                      If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

                      At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

                      Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

                      3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

                      Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

                      4. Process your thoughts/emotions

                      Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

                      1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
                      2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
                      3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
                      4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

                      5. Acknowledge your thoughts

                      Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

                      By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

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                      Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

                      6. Give yourself a break

                      If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

                      7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

                      A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

                      Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

                      After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

                      8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

                      As Helen Keller once said,

                      “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

                      Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

                      9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

                      In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

                      1. What’s the situation?
                      2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
                      3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
                      4. Take action on your next steps!

                      After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

                      10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

                      A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

                      Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

                      For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

                      11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

                      No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

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                      12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

                      No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

                      13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

                      There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

                      After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

                      Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

                      Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

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