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3 Ways to Be the Designer of Your Own Life

3 Ways to Be the Designer of Your Own Life

Blonde lady with a passion for shoes looking at part of her collection trying to decide which ones to wear

    Jake, was my trusted lieutenant. One of the smartest people I knew. He could crunch numbers like no one else can. A wizard of sorts for all practical purposes. But the one quality I respected, the most, in Jake was his attitude. He was content where he was. He took life as it came. Never overly ambitious about achieving that title or the corner office. If life gave him that, he was happy.

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    And then there is KT. Dear friend. Since childhood, he had only one dream. To be the captain of a ship. Life was all about sailing. Collecting pictures of ships. Going to movies that dealt with sea adventures. Playing with ship toys. I could go on and on. Guess what he ended up becoming? A captain. Sailing from port to port. Commanding some of the largest ships in the maritime trade. Knew what he wanted. Got what he wanted.

    Not to forget Manny. The one guy who you would love to meet again. He had the most charming personality among the people I knew. Genuine love for people. He could laugh and cry with you. His single biggest strength was his ability to relate to people. Manny was the proverbial glue in people’s lives. Manny knew he was a people person.  He could rally a team and get them moving in any direction he wanted. Not surprisingly so he now leads one of the largest corporations on Wall Street.

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    Three stories. From completely different backgrounds. Stories of individuals who knew exactly what they wanted.

    Others stand in awe of people who  know what they want. Know what their strengths and weaknesses are. Know their appetite for risk. Some call this “the designer life”. What is the big difference between people like these who have a designer life and the rest of us who are still finding our way?

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    Like Jake, there are folks who have made their peace with the present. Money, career, position, advancement all matter to these folks as well. However, you won’t find them losing their sleep on it. They will go after all these at the pace they decide. At a time and place that they feel won’t disrupt their peace and comfort. The important point here is to be at peace with the design you have chosen for your life. 

    The beauty of life is that the non-Jakes are not evil people. We are just happy enough to put our best foot forward and live life to its fullest. We live life on our terms – much like the Jakes. For those of us non-Jakes, the struggle always, is to figure out, what to do to get that fancy, designer, glitter-filled life that KT and Manny live.

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    Here are three ways how you can get your designer life like the heroes I know:

    1. Start from where you are: Simple? No. Because most often the dilemma is if it is already too late. We worry if we have missed the boat. Whether by way of age, health or wealth the biggest question is did I forever miss the opportunity by not going for it when I was 20 or when I was in optimal health, and more. The secret is, no matter how old you are or healthy, there is always a way to achieve your goal. You have to trust and put your best foot forward. My all time favorite example is the life of Chris Gardner who went from being homeless to becoming a successful entrepreneur, investor, stock broker and many other things. What a transformation! You can start from where you are. 
    2. Know what you want: KT, Manny, and Chris Gardner all knew what they wanted. Chris Gardner’s face-to-face with reality came when he spotted the red Ferrari 308 pull into the parking spot. And the rest is history. The point is, even if you don’t already know what it is you want, its okay. Get cracking. And decide to find that goal, target, purpose, objective today. It’s okay that you did not know it already. But even if you started today, there is every chance you will make it if you know what is it that you want. You are the designer of your life. Design the way you want it.
    3. Give it all you got: If you got past the first two and figured out what it is you want, it ain’t gonna happen by magic. As told by Thomas Edison, “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work”. True. Wanting a Ferrari is not the same as having to work for it. Wanting the CEO title is not as easy as wishing it. You have got to burn the midnight oil. And be ready to work weekends.

    Getting a designer life is a lot simpler than getting a designer shoe. Because you have very little control over who or how your shoe is designed. With life – you can design it all by yourself in the way you want it.

    Get yourself a designer life.

    Will you?

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    Last Updated on November 15, 2018

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

    What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

    As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

    The Success Mindset

    Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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    The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

    The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

    The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

    How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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    How To Create a Success Mindset

    People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

    1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

    How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

    A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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    There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

    2. Look For The Successes

    It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

    3. Eliminate Negativity

    You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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    When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

    4. Create a Vision

    Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

    If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

    An Inspirational Story…

    For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

    What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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