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9 Reasons Staying Single For A Long Time Will Boost Your Next Relationship

9 Reasons Staying Single For A Long Time Will Boost Your Next Relationship

Not everyone wants to be in a relationship and not everyone wants to be single. They are two different worlds. But getting the best out of both of these experiences can be crucial for your happiness. Yes, we all want to be happy, whether we are in a relationship or not.

Despite what some people may think, taking time out to be on your own can help you to become a better person and allow you to be ready for the challenges a new relationship will bring. Being single for a long time can actually be really helpful in preparing you for your next relationship. Here are some reasons why:

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1. You are able to establish new standards

Being single can sometimes make it easier to be more picky and to set clearer standards for yourself. This allows you to be able to learn what you really want in a partner and to identify that person when they come along.

2. You are mentally stronger

Being single gives you a level of independence. This boosts your mental strength and your willingness to cope with challenges. You don’t fuss about the small stuff because you are able to see these things in a different light, allowing you to become a person more capable of thriving in a relationship.

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3. You have more confidence

Being single definitely helps you to feel more secure in certain aspects of your life. Because of your confidence, you don’t enter a new relationship because you are insecure or feel inferior; rather you do so because you seek someone who will complement your life. You have your self-esteem in check and as such, you are able to deal effectively with anything that might harm your self-confidence.

4. You have something to offer your partner

Yes, being single can help to strengthen many of your life skills. You are more structured, and organised, and your life skills are something that you can offer a partner, helping them to remain content and feel supported.

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5. You are not afraid to take risks

Due to being single, you are often willing to try out many new things and this can lead you to develop a more holistic outlook on life. You are able to enjoy not feeling stuck- experiencing a great sense of freedom. Being in a relationship will not change this all of a sudden, or necessarily threaten your sense of freedom. Rather you will bring this adventurous set of instincts to your new relationship, and I bet your new partner will find it invigorating.

6. You can trust yourself

Whether your partner is looking for this quality or not, through being single for a long time you have become more trusting. You can trust yourself to make major decisions, while also allowing a partner to offer their opinions and/or support. You are not fickle or indecisive when making decisions about a range of matters. Because of this, you have been able to develop opinions and perspectives that can strengthen a relationship.

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7. You know what you deserve

You can ask for the things that matter to you in your relationship. You are not silent or passive aggressive. If you want better sex, you can ask for it. If you want better communication, you can ask for it. You are not there to be taken for granted. Rather you make sure that you are valued in the relationship. Every person serious about a relationship wants a partner who is actively engaged with making the relationship harmonious and enjoyable.

8. You know the hidden elements in a relationship

Being single exposed you to what is necessary in your world- and what might be missing in your world too. Entering a relationship makes you discover a new angle on your life. Yes, you know what you need and how a relationship can help you to get these things. Thus, because of these discoveries, you can value a relationship for what it offers you.

9. You don’t have any limitations

While some people may feel trapped by an obligation to pursue marriage/ a serious long-term relationship, this is not the case for you. You have stayed single for so long that you can now navigate almost any obstacle or sharp corner with confidence. You are able to discover and learn, rather than getting stuck and lost in self doubt. You are a survivor and being single for so long has prepared you well for the challenges any new relationship will bring.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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