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10 Inspirational Life Lessons From Single Mom Entrepreneurs

10 Inspirational Life Lessons From Single Mom Entrepreneurs

Being a successful entrepreneur parent is a feat in and of itself. But single mom entrepreneurs all need a medal of valor. You don’t only have your business’ profits hinging on your every move, you have your children’s physical, mental, and emotional well-being resting squarely on your own shoulders. And every decision you make doesn’t just affect your company, but your family…with few, if any, people to help you carry that load.

Being a mother requires tremendous amount support. Being an entrepreneur, just as much. But when you carry the boulder of responsibility of the two alone, well, some days running and hiding in your blanket fort sounds far more appealing. Yet, you get up and do it anyway because they both depend on you and that’s your only option.

These 10 single mom entrepreneurs do it every day and have created businesses that are thriving and successful, and so are their babies.

1. Single motherhood is not a setback.

1414505552-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-angela-benton

    “Being a single mom is NOT a setback”, says Angela Benton, founder and CEO of NewMe. Her company has accelerated over 300 startups and helped them secure $17M in venture capital funding. Design and tech leading lady has been power listed in Ebony, Marie Claire, and Goldman Sach’s.

    “Don’t get me wrong, entrepreneurship is a ton of work. However don’t let the perception of this lifestyle count you out before you even count yourself in. Being a single mom comes with a wealth of skills that do well in entrepreneurship like: multitasking, creativity, managing and/or operating on a budget, and problem-solving to say the least. I don’t know about you but I’d put my money on someone with these skills rather than a new college grad.”

    Use the skills you’ve mastered as a mom to master your business by utilizing your think-outside-the-box creativity and resourcefulness to make your supermom status work for you in your business.

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    2. Your babies are the most valuable parts of your team.

    1414505713-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-lauren-thom

      “You have to make family a part of your business… I’ve always considered my kids to be my board of directors, whether we’re moving or having them share a bedroom so we can open a store in our house. Make them a part of that journey. And that’s for any mom, not just single moms… Our kids are our reason to seek out a better life,” says Lauren Thom, founder of Fleurty Girl.

      Lauren took her 2009 tax return, invested it in her t-shirt idea and five years laters, her brand is a staple for the NOLA enthusiast.

      Whether it’s letting them in on deadlines or turning a bedroom into an inventory space, like Thom did, keep your babes in the loop and on top of what’s going on in your biz. Some of them even work well as motivators to get you back on track when you’re feeling off. (My youngest serves as a manager on those days when I can’t get my head around everything.)

      3. Feel out your own rhythm.

      1414506672-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-nusha-pelicano

        “The truth is you can do it all if you just change what your definition of balance is. There are times where my business gets more attention than my kids and vice versa. In the end I like to believe that is all balances out. Part of being an entrepreneur is being comfortable with changing direction quickly. Needless to say as a single mother and entrepreneur you’ll get a ton of use out of that skill! So relax, have faith, and take it one day at a time,” says Nusha Pelicano, owner of 5 Orange Leaf franchises, Iron Man competitor, and single mother of six.

        Balance happens when magic does. Make your magic in your business on you schedule, even if it means working when everyone’s asleep or making arrangements for them to be entertained so you can work when you’re at your most creative.

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        4. Fairy tales don’t serve you.

        1414506671-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-zhena-muzyka

          “When dating, look for potential partners who love what you do and show it by changing their schedule to be there for you. When I found my husband, he made every effort to help me with Sage, he’d drive almost two hours to babysit so I could do marketing events, even though he had an executive position of his own. Not all partners will want to play a support role, so find someone who has a deep passion of their own and isn’t afraid to nurture it, they’ll allow you the same,” Zhena Muzyka, head of the multi-million dollar fair trade tea company, Zhena’s Gypsy Tea.

          Date only the people that see your value and don’t try to detract from it.

          5. Say no to toxic people.

          1414505637-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-lisa-stone

            Ban toxic people from your life. You don’t have enough time already, right single mom or dad? So if you are living or working or worshipping around a toxic person or people who invade your confidence and bring you down, you MUST remove them from your life,” says Lisa Stone, co-founder of Blog-Her, a women-focused media platform with an audience of 100 million.

            People can suck the life out of you or they can add to your power. Stay away from the energy drains and pay attention when the red flags pop up in your gut.

            6. Break before you break.

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            1414505714-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-karla-campos

              “Entrepreneurship, just like motherhood, is not a 9-5 job. Some days I stay up until 3 a.m. working and then have to do a 7 a.m. child drop off at school. Be kind to yourself. Make time for you even if it’s just to breathe and smell the air. Kids are going to make messes, they are going to eat your reports and download viruses to your computer. Your best weapon is a sense of humor. Enjoy your single mom entrepreneur life, wear the title proudly. We are basically super heroes, says Karla Campos.

              Sometimes a shower is all you need to take a few minutes to recharge your batteries, but the key is making your breaks conscious additions to your day by reminding yourself, “Okay, it’s time to walk away for a minute and when I come back from it, I’m going to be re-energized and ready to roll (with the kids or the work).”

              7. Drive trumps all.

              1414505714-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-melissa-kieling

                Look for inspiration everywhere. Make note of all the things that frustrate you in your daily life, then research creative ways to address those inefficiencies. All it takes is an idea and an Internet connection to create a product that changes the world.

                Don’t let inexperience stop you. My business résumé was basically limited to school bake sales. Not knowing which steps to take first nearly paralyzed me with fear. I overcame this by reaching out to other business owners who could connect me to experts in manufacturing, production and sales. Each key person I met shortened my learning curve and gave me confidence. You’ll be pleasantly surprised by how other small business owners want to pay it forward and see new upstarts succeed,” Melissa Kieling, owner of the $14M PackIt Personal Cooler company, born out of her need to keep her kids’ lunch cool and safe.

                Drive is a massive substitute for talent. Don’t see what you don’t know as a block, see it as fuel to get to the next step.

                8. Kiss guilt goodbye.

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                1414506671-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-natalie-angelillo

                  “There is enough guilt to go around for any parent, so I make a conscious effort to let it go and focus on the positives. I may have a hectic schedule, and, as a result, my children are learning how to be independent and self-reliant. They are getting an inside-look at how a startup works, by testing our app and coming into the office, which I know will benefit them in the long-term,” says Natalie Angelilo, founder and CEO of Swopboard.com and Swink Style Bar, she’s also held VP and C-Level positions as Getty Images, PhotoDisc, and PhotoZone.

                  This guilt thing is a huge road block for so many. Keep your goal in mind and remind yourself that you’re creating a better life for your kids, while teaching them skills that will give them self-confidence in a world that won’t always flow in their favor.

                  9. Adopt a new view.

                  1414506672-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-brook-eddy

                    The “poor me” mentality only serves procrastination, self-doubt, and a negative thought loop – not our greater purpose or our nobler ability to trust. Furthermore, those added stressors (or ‘influencers’ as I sometimes refer to my ten year old twins) may in fact be the very inspiration for your next product line, marketing initiative, or social media campaign,” Brook Eddy, founder of Bhakti Chai.

                    Feeling sorry for ourselves as moms who may not have the luxury of time that others have puts a veil over what we potentially have the ability to accomplish. Hold your regard for getting things done high because you ARE making it happen without the ease that others have.

                    10. You are your only protector of your time.

                    1414506673-10-single-mom-entrepreneurs-share-their-best-business-advice-sherry-colbourne

                      “Mompreneurs, more than other entrepreneurs, need to be disciplined in their relationship with time. When I was a single mom with a growing business, I would wake up at 5 a.m. so I’d be in the right frame of mind to deal with my then teenage children. Morning conversation and breakfast provided the energy we needed for the day and a sit-down dinner provided the engagement we needed to stay connected. I found the natural rhythms in my business and used them to schedule appointments and work out,” says Sherry Colbourne, 20-year tech star from Canada, now living and growing entrepreneurs in Oman.

                      Guard your time, and look for the windows of minutes that will accumulate enough to give you what you need to make magic in your business. Sometimes that means letting go of the notion that you’ll be able to sit down and accomplish things in one sitting. Chris Brogan calls this “weaving time”. You work when you can and don’t hold out for the huge chunks of time you dream of.

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                      Last Updated on January 15, 2021

                      7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

                      7 Ways To Have More Confident Body Language

                      The popular idiomatic saying that “actions speak louder than words” has been around for centuries, but even to this day, most people struggle with at least one area of nonverbal communication. Consequently, many of us aspire to have more confident body language but don’t have the knowledge and tools necessary to change what are largely unconscious behaviors.

                      Given that others’ perceptions of our competence and confidence are predominantly influenced by what we do with our faces and bodies, it’s important to develop greater self-awareness and consciously practice better posture, stance, eye contact, facial expressions, hand movements, and other aspects of body language.

                      Posture

                      First things first: how is your posture? Let’s start with a quick self-assessment of your body.

                      • Are your shoulders slumped over or rolled back in an upright posture?
                      • When you stand up, do you evenly distribute your weight or lean excessively to one side?
                      • Does your natural stance place your feet relatively shoulder-width apart or are your feet and legs close together in a closed-off position?
                      • When you sit, does your lower back protrude out in a slumped position or maintain a straight, spine-friendly posture in your seat?

                      All of these are important considerations to make when evaluating and improving your posture and stance, which will lead to more confident body language over time. If you routinely struggle with maintaining good posture, consider buying a posture trainer/corrector, consulting a chiropractor or physical therapist, stretching daily, and strengthening both your core and back muscles.

                      Facial Expressions

                      Are you prone to any of the following in personal or professional settings?

                      • Bruxism (tight, clenched jaw or grinding teeth)
                      • Frowning and/or furrowing brows
                      • Avoiding direct eye contact and/or staring at the ground

                      If you answered “yes” to any of these, then let’s start by examining various ways in which you can project confident body language through your facial expressions.

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                      1. Understand How Others Perceive Your Facial Expressions

                      A December 2020 study by UC Berkeley and Google researchers utilized a deep neural network to analyze facial expressions in six million YouTube clips representing people from over 140 countries. The study found that, despite socio-cultural differences, people around the world tended to use about 70% of the same facial expressions in response to different emotional stimuli and situations.[1]

                      The study’s researchers also published a fascinating interactive map to demonstrate how their machine learning technology assessed various facial expressions and determined subtle differences in emotional responses.

                      This study highlights the social importance of facial expressions because whether or not we’re consciously aware of them—by gazing into a mirror or your screen on a video conferencing platform—how we present our faces to others can have tremendous impacts on their perceptions of us, our confidence, and our emotional states. This awareness is the essential first step towards

                      2. Relax Your Face

                      New research on bruxism and facial tension found the stresses and anxieties of Covid-19 lockdowns led to considerable increases in orofacial pain, jaw-clenching, and teeth grinding, particularly among women.[2]

                      The National Institute of Dental and Craniofacial Research estimates that more than 10 million Americans alone have temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMJ syndrome), and facial tension can lead to other complications such as insomnia, wrinkles, dry skin, and dark, puffy bags under your eyes.[3])

                      To avoid these unpleasant outcomes, start practicing progressive muscle relaxation techniques and taking breaks more frequently throughout the day to moderate facial tension.[4] You should also try out some biofeedback techniques to enhance your awareness of involuntary bodily processes like facial tension and achieve more confident body language as a result.[5]

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                      3. Improve Your Eye Contact

                      Did you know there’s an entire subfield of kinesic communication research dedicated to eye movements and behaviors called oculesics?[6] It refers to various communication behaviors including direct eye contact, averting one’s gaze, pupil dilation/constriction, and even frequency of blinking. All of these qualities can shape how other people perceive you, which means that eye contact is yet another area of nonverbal body language that we should be more mindful of in social interactions.

                      The ideal type (direct/indirect) and duration of eye contact depends on a variety of factors, such as cultural setting, differences in power/authority/age between the parties involved, and communication context. Research has shown that differences in the effects of eye contact are particularly prominent when comparing East Asian and Western European/North American cultures.[7]

                      To improve your eye contact with others, strive to maintain consistent contact for at least 3 to 4 seconds at a time, consciously consider where you’re looking while listening to someone else, and practice eye contact as much as possible (as strange as this may seem in the beginning, it’s the best way to improve).

                      3. Smile More

                      There are many benefits to smiling and laughing, and when it comes to working on more confident body language, this is an area that should be fun, low-stakes, and relatively stress-free.

                      Smiling is associated with the “happiness chemical” dopamine and the mood-stabilizing hormone, serotonin. Many empirical studies have shown that smiling generally leads to positive outcomes for the person smiling, and further research has shown that smiling can influence listeners’ perceptions of our confidence and trustworthiness as well.

                      4. Hand Gestures

                      Similar to facial expressions and posture, what you do with your hands while speaking or listening in a conversation can significantly influence others’ perceptions of you in positive or negative ways.

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                      It’s undoubtedly challenging to consciously account for all of your nonverbal signals while simultaneously trying to stay engaged with the verbal part of the discussion, but putting in the effort to develop more bodily awareness now will make it much easier to unconsciously project more confident body language later on.

                      5. Enhance Your Handshake

                      In the article, “An Anthropology of the Handshake,” University of Copenhagen social anthropology professor Bjarke Oxlund assessed the future of handshaking in wake of the Covid-19 pandemic:[8]

                      “Handshakes not only vary in function and meaning but do so according to social context, situation and scale. . . a public discussion should ensue on the advantages and disadvantages of holding on to the tradition of shaking hands as the conventional gesture of greeting and leave-taking in a variety of circumstances.”

                      It’s too early to determine some of the ways in which Covid-19 has permanently changed our social norms and professional etiquette standards, but it’s reasonable to assume that handshaking may retain its importance in American society even after this pandemic. To practice more confident body language in the meantime, the video on the science of the perfect handshake below explains what you need to know.

                      6. Complement Your Verbals With Hand Gestures

                      As you know by now, confident communication involves so much more than simply smiling more or sounding like you know what you’re talking about. What you do with your hands can be particularly influential in how others perceive you, whether you’re fidgeting with an object, clenching your fists, hiding your hands in your pockets, or calmly gesturing to emphasize important points you’re discussing.

                      Social psychology researchers have found that “iconic gestures”—hand movements that appear to be meaningfully related to the speaker’s verbal content—can have profound impacts on listeners’ information retention. In other words, people are more likely to engage with you and remember more of what you said when you speak with complementary hand gestures instead of just your voice.[9]

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                      Further research on hand gestures has shown that even your choice of the left or right hand for gesturing can influence your ability to clearly convey information to listeners, which supports the notion that more confident body language is readily achievable through greater self-awareness and deliberate nonverbal actions.[10]

                      Final Takeaways

                      Developing better posture, enhancing your facial expressiveness, and practicing hand gestures can vastly improve your communication with other people. At first, it will be challenging to consciously practice nonverbal behaviors that many of us are accustomed to performing daily without thinking about them.

                      If you ever feel discouraged, however, remember that there’s no downside to consistently putting in just a little more time and effort to increase your bodily awareness. With the tips and strategies above, you’ll be well on your way to embracing more confident body language and amplifying others’ perceptions of you in no time.

                      More Tips on How to Develop a Confident Body Language

                      Featured photo credit: Maria Lupan via unsplash.com

                      Reference

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