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A Bucket, a Dipper, and You: 5 Strategies for Managers and Supervisors

A Bucket, a Dipper, and You: 5 Strategies for Managers and Supervisors

Each person has an invisible bucket. It is either being constantly emptied or filled, depending on our interactions with others. When our bucket is full, we feel on top of the world. When it’s empty, we feel terrible.

Each of us also has an invisible dipper. We can use that dipper to fill people’s buckets by the positive things we say or do, which in turn, fills our own bucket. Sometimes we can use that dipper to dip from other people’s buckets by saying and doing things that decrease their self-worth and self-esteem, which in reality, affects how we feel about ourselves.

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How do you feel when Monday mornings roll around? Do you feel excited about your new work week, or the exact opposite? Would you rather stay home or head into the office. Much of how we feel has a lot to do with our interactions, not just at work, but on a daily basis.

In How Full is Your Bucket? Positive Strategies for Work and Life, authors Tom Rath and Donald O. Clifton opine that our lives are shaped by our interactions with others. Whether it’s a long conversation with a trusted friend or a brief encounter with a cashier at the corner market, every interaction makes a difference. Rath and Clifton’s research shows that the results of our encounters are rarely neutral. They are almost always positive or negative. The accumulation of these interactions over a lifetime can profoundly affect our lives

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Below are five strategies outlined from Rath and Clifton’s book. When they are put into practice they will make a difference organization-wide and change the lives of managers, supervisors, and employees.

1. Prevent Bucket Dipping

Managers and supervisors regularly ask themselves if they are adding to someone’s bucket or if they are taking from it by how they speak and interact with them. Is it positive or negative? Remember, how you interact with others will determine how they will act with you. So be kind and pleasant and your employees will reciprocate.

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2. Shine a Light on What is Right

Don’t solely focus on the negative. Spend the majority of your time focusing on the power of what is right. Whatever you spend more time giving attention to is what you will get in return. If you shine a light on the positive things your employees do, they will do more of it.

3. Make Best Friends

Why is this important? According to Rath’s and Clifton’s research, people with best friends at work have better safety records, receive higher customer satisfaction scores, and increase workplace productivity. One way to make friends is to be a friend. Do for someone else, what you want done to you. Write down a list of things you can do for other people, then go do it!

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4. Give Unexpectedly

According to a recent Gallup Poll, the vast majority of people prefer gifts that are unexpected. An unexpected gift doesn’t have to be tangible. You can give by saying “please” and “thank you”. Managers and supervisors, look for opportunities to give gifts to others out of the blue. Even a smile can be an unexpected gift. When you give with no expectation to receive, it contributes to not only the other person’s happiness, but also to your overall well-being and satisfaction. The law of reciprocation says that what you give out, you will get in return, so when you give to others, other people must give back to you. This law is never wrong.

5. Reverse the Golden Rule

“Do unto others as they would have you do unto them.” This means that not all people like to receive the same things in the same way. Some people like public recognition, while others do not. Discover your employee’s preferences and intentionally recognize them in the way they like best.

Featured photo credit: Bucket and Gulls/ Jeffrey via flickr.com

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meiko patton

Founder - Never Ever Give Up

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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