Advertising
Advertising

10 Super Easy Ways To Stay Positive Every Day

10 Super Easy Ways To Stay Positive Every Day

I know, I know. You’re probably thinking it’s impossible to be positive every day. However, extenuating circumstances aside, it’s quite possible to start your day with a positive mindset. When things go wrong, there’s always a silver lining to keep you above water, even if you’re swimming against the current.

There are many ways you can maintain a sunny disposition in even the worst of situations. Be sure to:

1. Make a plan

Things won’t always go according to this plan, but if you set out a list of goals you want to accomplish by the end of the day (or week), you’ll always have something to strive for. By making a to-do list, you ensure that each day you experience will be at least a little different than the one before it. Plus, when you check off that last item every day, you’ll go to bed knowing you did much more than simply go to work, come home, and watch TV.

2. Have a routine

Although you appreciate variety, there are some things you should do every day. Take some time to stretch and exercise, even if it means taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Use quiet mornings to spend a few moments in deep thought, or the time right before bed to reflect on what you accomplished throughout the day. If you have a hobby, set aside a specific block of time to work on it every day. Once you get into a routine, you’ll have specific things to look forward to.

Advertising

3. Appreciate the small stuff

How do you feel when you spill coffee on yourself, first thing in the morning? Or hit every red light on the way to work? Do you think “Ugh, this happens to me every time”?

Obviously, this is an overreaction. You simply don’t make a big deal about all the times you avoid spilling coffee on yourself. And there have definitely been times you’ve hit every green light on the way to work that you didn’t jump up and down about. It’s an odd phenomenon that spilling coffee on yourself is enough to start your day off badly, but not spilling coffee on yourself isn’t enough to make your day absolutely incredible.

Maybe it’s time we start celebrating these victories all the time, like that football player in the commercial: “Woo!!! 44, that’s me!” (C’mon, you know the one…)

4. Smile

It sounds cheesy, but starting your morning off with a smile can set the ball rolling toward an incredibly positive day. Keep that smile on your face as you walk past people on the street and in the office. Not only will it subconsciously keep you in a great mood, but it may also have a contagious effect.

Advertising

Especially on Mondays, when many people are feeling pretty crabby, try to be the catalyst that lightens up everyone else’s day.

5. Use positive vocabulary

A few weeks ago, a colleague of mine asked how I was doing. I replied, as a courtesy, “Not too bad!” (with a smile on my face). He responded with, “Not bad? I want to hear ‘ecstatic’, ‘incredible’, ‘amazing!'”

There’s a big difference between “not bad” and “amazing”. The former makes it seem like you’re amazed that you’re not feeling atrocious, whereas the latter is bursting with excitement. Express yourself with vivacious vocabulary (and that cheesy smile) to spread positivity throughout your life.

6. Spend time with positive people

Nobody likes a “Debbie Downer.” If you find yourself surrounded by people who thrive on being unhappy, ditch them immediately. Obviously, your friends will have their ups and downs. But if they are constantly trying to bring you down with them, you need to take control of the situation before you lose your sunny disposition.

Advertising

Find people who exhibit the same excitement for life that you have, and you’ll never experience a dull moment.

7. Do something nice for others

Being positive isn’t all about yourself. Spread the love around! You could pick up your wife’s favorite flowers on the way home from work, or volunteer at a soup kitchen during your free time. You’d be surprised how good it feels to help others out and make their lives just a bit easier. If we all took time to pay it forward, we could set off a chain reaction of good deeds that spread throughout the entire world.

8. Control your own destiny

No one can force you to be positive; you have to make it so. It might take work, but the rewards are definitely worth the effort. Don’t just sit back and hope to get promoted; put yourself out there and make sure your boss sees how hard you’ve been working. Don’t wait for your future husband to sweep you off your feet; go out there and find him.

Your dreams will never become a reality unless you decide to go for it.

Advertising

9. Don’t beat yourself up

Everyone has bad days, and everyone makes mistakes. Don’t waste precious time kicking yourself for some bonehead decision you made. Instead, use what you learned to help yourself improve the next time a similar situation arises. If you went for a job interview and didn’t get a call back, think about how you could have presented yourself a little better. Then, view that lesson learned as ammo for your next interview.

Life is a learning process. If you’re not learning, you’re wasting your time.

10. Do something different

Getting caught up in the daily grind can make you bored and complacent. Try to do something new every single day. It could be something simple like using your GPS to find a different way home. Or something more drastic like picking up that musical instrument you’ve always wanted to learn. Learn to cook a new meal. Take that book off your shelf that you’ve been dying to get into. Take your family out for an impromptu ice cream date.

There are infinite experiences to have on this Earth, and only one life to experience them all in. So what are you waiting for? Don’t waste a minute!

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm8.staticflickr.com

More by this author

12 Signs Of Self-Destructive People 7 Public Speaking Techniques To Help Connect With Your Audience 20 Little Signs You’ve Found The One 8 Signs of a Man Who Will Never Ever Stop Loving You 8 Things To Remember When Dating Someone With A Guarded Heart

Trending in Communication

1 Procrastination Is a Matter of Emotion, Here’s How to Stop It 2 What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It) 3 How to Get Unstuck in Life and Live a More Fulfilling Life 4 What Will Happen When You Surround Yourself With Positive People? 5 How to Surround Yourself With Positive People

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

Advertising

1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

Advertising

If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

Advertising

6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

Advertising

In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

Read Next