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20 Things Everyone Deserves in a Relationship

20 Things Everyone Deserves in a Relationship

Are you in a happy relationship? A good relationship brings out the best traits in someone, making them happier, more open, loving and accepting. However, a bad relationship can be emotionally damaging. Check out these 20 things everyone deserves to have in a relationship.

1. Laughter

Your partner may have a totally different sense of humor than you, but they should still make you laugh and smile. Loving someone means wanting to see them happy, so a happy relationship is normally filled with side-splitting laughter and silly inside jokes.

2. Someone to go on adventures with

The world is filled with interesting places, from the places you haven’t explored in your town to other countries. A happy relationship involves two people who want to share new experiences and adventures with each other, not people who hold each other back and keep each other inside.

3. Security

An important part of a happy relationship is being able to rely on your partner. You should be able to be able to have a bad day where you feel upset or angry without fearing that your partner will leave you.

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4. Someone who is always excited to see you

After a few years of being with each other, you may not have butterflies in your stomach when you first see each other, but you should still be happy and excited to see each other. Even when you’re in a terrible mood, seeing your partner should make you feel happier, rather than worse.

5. Passion

Spontaneous kisses and passionate sex are a lot of fun. Even if it doesn’t happen often, you should know that your partner loves you and finds you irresistible.

6. Someone to stay up late with

From staying out drinking to sitting up outside gazing at stars, every once in a while your partner should make you want to stay up so you can enjoy the world and have fun.

7. Someone who challenges you

In a happy relationship both partners look up to each other and admire each other. Instead of bringing each other down, you deserve to feel challenged by each other, and to open each other’s minds to new ideas and concepts.

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8. Little gestures

Little gestures like cooking your favorite meals or making you a homemade birthday cards, show that you love each other. These little gestures show your partner that you think about them all the time, and that you know and love them for who they are.

9. Understanding

Maybe you cry whenever you watch romantic comedies, and maybe you like to dip your chips in melted chocolate–if so, your partner should understand that. Even if they don’t want to do it with you, they should understand that you are your own person with your own quirks. They should love you for every little quirk.

10. Someone to be silly with

Life is hard, and it is important that your partner is someone who you can let go and be silly with. From dancing in the kitchen as you cook to play-fighting, you should be able to relax and have fun with your partner even when times are hard.

11. Someone who cheers you on

In a great relationship, both partners are each other’s cheerleaders, cheering each other on with every decision they make. It can be tough living without support, and your partner should offer you unlimited support.

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12. Mutual trust

Your partner shouldn’t worry that you will cheat on them, or that you will take all the money from your joint bank account. You love each other and support each other, and trust is an essential part of that.

13. Respect

In a good relationship, both partners admire and respect each other. After all, you chose to commit to them so you must think they are pretty awesome.

14. A partner in crime

From sneaking alcohol into the cinema to covering for you when you lie to your mom and say you can’t come over because you’re ill, your partner should always be your partner in crime.

15. Freedom

In a healthy relationship, both partners understand that they both need freedom and space from each other to see other people and do their own thing.

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16. Someone who stands up for you

After a long, hard day, you may struggle to stick up for yourself. But if you’re in a happy relationship, your partner should always be in your corner.

17. Someone who will listen to you vent

The new girl in the office is terrible at her job, and your partner is happy to listen to you vent about this for three hours. Instead of telling you to be quiet, they smile with understanding and pass you a cup of coffee–because they know you will do the same for them when they have a hard day.

18. Intimacy

From holding hands to sharing secret looks, your partner should be physically intimate with you as well as emotionally intimate.

19. Open communication

Communication is one of the most important things in a relationship, and you and your partner should both feel like you can openly discuss anything with each other without fear of being dismissed.

20. A best friend

Your partner should be more than your lover; they should be your best friend, strengthening your bond and loving you unconditionally.

Can you think of anything else that everyone deserves in a relationship? Leave your ideas in the comments.

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Amy Johnson

Amy is a writer who blogs about relationships and lifestyle advice.

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

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