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8 Things Smart Couples Do To Enliven Their Long-Term Relationships

8 Things Smart Couples Do To Enliven Their Long-Term Relationships

How do you feel when you see two wonderful couples walking together and acting out their love as if its flames had never gone dim? We all envy happy couples. But it does take some hard work and effort to keep a relationship going not for the short term but for a long term. And it takes some smartness too. Here are some things smart couples do to enliven their long term relationships.

1. They communicate

It all starts from how much you believe and act on communicating to each other. Smart couples build on this and enliven their relationships. They always find ways to communicate their needs and feelings to each other. It all starts from saying the right words and appreciating the other person the best way possible.

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2. They do things together

It could be going out to shop for grocery and food items together or cooking together. Long term couples always enjoy doing things together. Some even go further to make interesting games out of their activities together like going to food store and first picking out three items for the other person.

3. They let things go

There is no point in fighting over seemingly little things and hold on to them to certain hurts to even a score. Long term couples understand that imperfect moments have built up to the point where they just have to be tolerant of the other person. While some issues like finances, career paths and kids could be worth having serious discussions on, many minor issues have to be discarded.

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4. They visit some new destinations together

Smart couples take advantage of new experiences and finding joy in new activities. Retreading new grounds or repeating the same activities over and over again doesn’t create new moments to be cherished. Smart couples do well to revitalize their relationship by putting themselves in new situations that will cause new experiences.

5. They offer their partners some space

Being in a relationship is a full time job. And it can become exhausting when there is no vacuum to get into yourself and be alone. Sometimes the best way to create sparkle into your relationship is to deliberately take some distance from your partner. Recognizing that your partner also needs sometime alone can make them appreciate you better.

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6. They give to each other with no strings attached

Smart couples don’t give to each other and don’t expect anything in return. Offering gifts are great to reawaken the other person that you care about him/her. When smart couples offer gifts to each other they do so from the heart and that is what matters, it is not about how much the gift item is worth rather it is the expression that counts. This helps smart couples to get the best out of their relationship in the long term.

7. They surprise each other

Who doesn’t love to be surprised the ideal way? Smart couples make the most out of surprising their partners. It could be by paying them a surprise visit and taking them out for lunch or simply to remind them that you have been thinking about them and you want to do something special to appreciate their value in your world. You don’t have to make surprises irritating or make it seem as if you are stalking them, rather you have to be attentive to what your partner likes and would appreciate.

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8. They set goals together

This doesn’t just help to strengthen their long term relationship, it also builds their ambition. Smart couples sit down to discuss where they want to be in two years, three years with their finances, kids, jobs and neighborhood. They don’t just set these goals, they also aim for how they will accomplish it together. They seek each others opinion on the subjects and how it could be beneficial to their health, happiness and comfort. Even when such can be done separately, smart people take advantage of doing such together to make enliven their relationships.

Featured photo credit: http://www.flickr.com via flickr.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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