Advertising
Advertising

8 Terrible Traits That Make You Unpopular

8 Terrible Traits That Make You Unpopular

It seems fitting I would sit down to write this article on a Monday morning, a time when many 9-5ers are at their worst. We all have bad days, and probably exhibit these traits at least once in a while, no matter how good of a person we really are. However, if you find yourself exhibiting any of these traits on a daily basis, it might be time to seek some help before your actions begin affecting your relationships at home and at work.

1. You are arrogant

An elitist attitude will get your nowhere in life. To project to the world that you think you’re better than everyone else out there simply shows how short-sighted and narrow-minded you are. The smartest and most successful people in the world got that way because they know there is always someone better than they are, and they continuously strive to improve. Believing you’re the best will impede your progress, and leave you stagnant. You should always remain humble, and always look for ways to improve your skills in some way.

Advertising

2. You are rude

Rude people have no filter, and don’t pay much attention to social conventions. They don’t take other people’s feelings into consideration, and believe the world exists only for them to live in it. Rude people often ignore others, and in turn are very lonely. You never know what connections you may make if you open yourself up to others rather than shutting them out. Even something as simple as holding a door open for someone could end up making his or her day. Being polite will almost certainly lead to bigger and better things.

3. You are dishonest

Everyone probably has told small lies once in a while. However, chronic lying can lead to disaster. Dishonest people try to weasel their way out of bad situations, instead of facing the truth and admitting mistakes. The problem with this is they must continue to construct lie after lie in order to hide the truth, while it would be much more productive to simply tell the truth and work toward improving their life from there. Obviously, people who lie are not trustworthy, and will lose friends and relationships if they continue to live a lie.

Advertising

4. You are temperamental

Some people are so inconsistent with their moods that it’s impossible to approach them, since you have no idea which side you’ll be getting. Those that are happy one day and miserable the next (when there is no obvious reason for the change) are uncomfortable to be around, as they often can be “set off” by even the slightest occurrence. Try to stay even keel when interacting with others, regardless of what situations you’re dealing with in your personal life. That way, when you truly are upset about something (and deservedly so), people will support you rather than run from you.

5. You are unreliable

It’s one thing to not offer to help someone out, but it’s another to make the offer and not follow through. Friends and coworkers who say they’ll do something for you, but put it off til the last minute (if they get to it at all), have proven to you that they can’t be trusted. Once you offer to do something for another person, completing the task should be your first priority (barring emergency circumstances, of course). Showing you can be counted on is one of the most important personality traits you can exhibit if you wish to build on a relationship.

Advertising

6. You are pessimistic

Nobody likes a “Debbie Downer.” Sure, there are a ton of problems in the world, but there is also a lot of good as well. Focusing on the negatives is no way to go through life, and no one will want to be around someone that always sees the glass as half empty. Even if things aren’t currently going your way, it never hurts to look on the bright side of life. Sure, things could always be better; but they could also be a lot worse. Count your blessings and give thanks for everything you do have in life, rather than wish you had more.

7. You are controlling

Controlling people micromanage the lives of everyone around them. The indication here is that they don’t give others credit for knowing how to live or do their job. Overbearing parents, bosses, and spouses leave others feeling unworthy and less likely to strive to do better. Controlling people are often abusive and condescending, and their counterpart will feel as if they have to walk on eggshells for fear of angering them. Being democratic and allowing others to be free to “do their own thing” will certainly lead to much better relationships across the board.

Advertising

8. You are mean

I saved the most obvious one for last. Nobody wants to be around mean people who constantly angry at everything around them. Like rude people, they have no filter; however, mean-spirited people will actively go out of their way to upset others. If you’ve ever worked with a mean person, you probably have gotten that bubbly feeling in your stomach every morning before you stepped into the office. One bad seed is enough to bring down an entire environment. Though mean people will always exist, it’s important for you to combat the trend by being as kind as possible to everyone around you.

Featured photo credit: Flickr via farm3.staticflickr.com

More by this author

20 Little Signs You’ve Found The One 8 Signs of a Man Who Will Never Ever Stop Loving You 8 Things To Remember When Dating Someone With A Guarded Heart 14 Signs You’re Not Drinking Enough Water Which Type of Visa Do You Need to Travel Abroad?

Trending in Communication

1 Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset 2 10 Strategies to Keep Moving Forward When You’re Feeling Extra Stuck 3 Learn the Different Types of Love (and Better Understand Your Partner) 4 Anxiety Coping Mechanisms That Work When You’re Stressed to the Max 5 How To Stop Insecure Attachment from Wreaking Havoc on Your Love Life

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

Advertising

The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

Advertising

How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

Advertising

There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

Advertising

When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

Read Next