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12 Things You Should Know Before Dating a Woman Who Doesn’t Mind Being Single

12 Things You Should Know Before Dating a Woman Who Doesn’t Mind Being Single

Being single is this amazing woman’s choice, not because she has been blacklisted by half of the population. She buys her own flowers and decorates her own soul; under no misconception that she is defined by having a partner. She doesn’t worry about her relationship status because she is fulfilled with herself, with her life and choices and dreams and purpose. She is also probably surrounded by suitors because well, confidence is sexy. And there are things you need to understand if you are one of these that hope to woo her.

1. She’s probably had her heart broken recently.

This means she will be extra cautious, fragile, sensitive and aware.

2. She’s not looking to take care of you.

Your laundry, cooking and “atta-boys” are not her responsibility. She needs you to understand your role as a lover and partner, not mother, maid or shrink.

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3. She knows what she’s into.

At a certain age we all know how we like our coffee, how we like our steak, and how we like our men (or women). This self-awareness is hard-won and in a way, liberating. She respects the bumps and bruises that led to this knowledge.

4. She’s a lion and a princess.

Is she sitting around and waiting to be rescued? Ha! Hardly. She’s a lion, out there taking charge and making her own way in the world. She does however, appreciate gallantry and courtesy. And will treat you in kind.

5. She’s looking for a partner, not a crutch (if she’s looking at all).

She likes inspiration, a cheer squad in her corner and a complex and challenging partner, but she doesn’t need it. There is nothing about a needy relationship that thrills her. She’s complete and validated with herself and through herself. Sexy, isn’t it?

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6. She appreciates the freedom to make a sandwich at 2a.m. Naked.

Living alone has certain appeal: freedom. She recognizes this and revels in it. Asking permission and incessant/unnecessary contact is not appealing, believe me.

7. She expects you to have your own life, because she certainly has hers.

She knows a person cannot make another person whole or complete. A relationship is there to enrich your lives and share with each other, so seeing you have your own friends and hobbies gives her a great sense of relief.

8. She flies solo really well.

She likes talking to strangers, exploring new things, trying new food, traveling. These make her feel connected and adventurous. Her self-esteem, self-awareness and self-reflection are all high and accurate. Not that she’s perfect. But she’s damn close and having fun experiencing all that she can!

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9. She’s her own “Killer of Spiders”.

For this, she deserves a badge of honor. There are handymen- tinkering around fixing parts and problems. She doesn’t need a handyman because she’s her own; from fixing her car to exterminating arachnids, she’s got this.

10. She lives and loves wholly.

She doesn’t settle for less in a romantic relationship (that is courage and strong will). She does however love her family, friends and previous partners. She is giving to all who she loves and just because a previous relationship ended, doesn’t mean it ended with animosity.

11. She’s enjoying it.

She might not be “attached” or in the “it’s serious” stage, but you can be certain she’s having a hell of a time dating.

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12. She’s a straight shooter.

That stuff we did in middle school: the gossip, insincere compliments, dramatic ploys for attention? It’s not in her repertoire, there’s no point and it makes no one feel good. Which doesn’t mean she doesn’t engage in witty repartee, she just chooses to respect herself and others.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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