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These Are The Times When You Should Not Say Anything

These Are The Times When You Should Not Say Anything

Silence at the appropriate moment can speak louder than words. Keeping quiet displays the wisdom, emotional maturity and confidence that will lead you to success. Here are 11 instances when you should not say anything:

1. When the other side misunderstands and you don’t have a duty to talk

Why waste words when the other side is not making the effort to understand what you have to say? Silence can never be misquoted. Let them learn through experience and you will save your peace of mind.

2. When two parties are arguing

Don’t get involved. If you intervene you may come under fire. Maintaining stoic silence on your part is best.

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3. When you have no idea what you’re talking about

Empty vessels make more noise. It is best not to say anything if you have nothing meaningful to say. Your words will carry more value when you speak only to make a sensible point.

4. When you need someone else to get the credit

You reflect quiet confidence in your abilities when you smile and let your boss or team take the credit for your work. The goodwill thus created will ensure your success in the long run.

5. When you are bragging instead of sharing

It’s best to be humble and let others appreciate you than to toot your own horn. Quietly focus on your work and let your hard work speak for you. Walgreens CEO Greg Wasson maintains “Confident humility and humble confidence,” on a regular basis.

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6. When your comment is more about you than others

Listening more is a great art of conversation. Check yourself when you are not including others or letting them express themselves as they will get bored of your narcissism and you will soon find yourself isolated.

7. When you want someone else to grow

Some people will criticize you just to provoke you into an argument. Don’t allow them the pleasure.Take the high road and show restraint. They are coming from a point of weakness themselves and would love to see you react negatively. Being silent makes you more powerful.

8. When the other party in negotiation starts debating against itself

Silence is the best reply in a negotiation. Many people feel uncomfortable in conversation gaps and may start revealing more than they should. You can then pick a weak point that will work in your favor.

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9. When you want to avoid angry outbursts

Don’t be like the matchstick that flares up on slightest friction. It causes destruction and then fizzles out for good. Move away to a quieter place. Drink some cold water if possible. Take deep breaths and calm your mind. Anger clouds your understanding. If you were wrong, there is room for rational brainstorming. If it’s righteous anger, silence is the best way to let the other person know they did wrong. Emotional self-control saves you from damaging your relationships.

10. When you want to listen to your inner voice

When I want to make major decisions, I find a quiet spot where I can be alone. Away from external distractions, I try to silence the inner clutter of my mind. Breathing deeply always works. Sitting in silence with a calm mind gives me a clearer perspective on things.

When you listen to your inner voice, you can problem-solve most effectively. According to international best-selling author and wellness expert Dr Deepak Chopra, listening to yourself in stillness increases creativity and lowers stress.

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11. When you receive negative feedback from your superiors

Accept it quietly, assess it, learn from it, improve and grow.

Iris Johansen rightfully said that “Silence and Smile are two powerful tools of successful people. Smile is the way to solve many problems and Silence is the way to avoid many problems.”

Featured photo credit: These are the times when you should not say anything/ Stoney Steiner via flickr.com

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Published on July 17, 2018

How Productive People Compartmentalize Time to Get the Most Done

How Productive People Compartmentalize Time to Get the Most Done

I’ve never believed people are born productive or organized. Being organized and productive is a choice.

You choose to keep your stuff organized or you don’t. You choose to get on with your work and ignore distractions or you don’t.

But one skill very productive people appear to have that is not a choice is the ability to compartmentalize. And that takes skill and practice.

What is compartmentalization

To compartmentalize means you have the ability to shut out all distractions and other work except for the work in front of you. Nothing gets past your barriers.

In psychology, compartmentalization is a defence mechanism our brains use to shut out traumatic events. We close down all thoughts about the traumatic event. This can lead to serious mental-health problems such as Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) if not dealt with properly.

However, compartmentalization can be used in positive ways to help us become more productive and allow us to focus on the things that are important to us.

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Robin Sharma, the renowned leadership coach, calls it his Tight Bubble of Total Focus Strategy. This is where he shuts out all distractions, turns off his phone and goes to a quiet place where no one will disturb him and does the work he wants to focus on. He allows nothing to come between himself and the work he is working on and prides himself on being almost uncontactable.

Others call it deep work. When I want to focus on a specific piece of work, I turn everything off, turn on my favourite music podcast The Anjunadeep Edition (soft, eclectic electronic music) and focus on the content I intend to work on. It works, and it allows me to get massive amounts of content produced every week.

The main point about compartmentalization is that no matter what else is going on in your life — you could be going through a difficult time in your relationships, your business could be sinking into bankruptcy or you just had a fight with your colleague; you can shut those things out of your mind and focus totally on the work that needs doing.

Your mind sees things as separate rooms with closable doors, so you can enter a mental room, close the door and have complete focus on whatever it is you want to focus on. Your mind does not wander.

Being able to achieve this state can seriously boost your productivity. You get a lot more quality work done and you find you have a lot more time to do the things you want to do. It is a skill worth mastering for the benefits it will bring you.

How to develop the skill of compartmentalization

The simplest way to develop this skill is to use your calendar.

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Your calendar is the most powerful tool you have in your productivity toolbox. It allows you to block time out, and it can focus you on the work that needs doing.

My calendar allows me to block time out so I can remove everything else out of my mind to focus on one thing. When I have scheduled time for writing, I know what I want to write about and I sit down and my mind completely focuses on the writing.

Nothing comes between me, my thoughts and the keyboard. I am in my writing compartment and that is where I want to be. Anything going on around me, such as a problem with a student, a difficulty with an area of my business or an argument with my wife is blocked out.

Understand that sometimes there’s nothing you can do about an issue

One of the ways to do this is to understand there are times when there is nothing you can do about an issue or an area of your life. For example, if I have a student with a problem, unless I am able to communicate with that student at that specific time, there is nothing I can do about it.

If I can help the student, I would schedule a meeting with the student to help them. But between now and the scheduled meeting there is nothing I can do. So, I block it out.

The meeting is scheduled on my calendar and I will be there. Until then, there is nothing I can do about it.

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Ask yourself the question “Is there anything I can do about it right now?”

This is a very powerful way to help you compartmentalize these issues.

If there is, focus all your attention on it to the exclusion of everything else until you have a workable solution. If not, then block it out, schedule time when you can do something about it and move on to the next piece of work you need to work on.

Being able to compartmentalize helps with productivity in another way. It reduces the amount of time you spend worrying.

Worrying about something is a huge waste of energy that never solves anything. Being able to block out issues you cannot deal with stops you from worrying about things and allows you to focus on the things you can do something about.

Reframe the problem as a question

Reframing the problem as a question such as “what do I have to do to solve this problem?” takes your mind away from a worried state into a solution state, where you begin searching for solutions.

One of the reasons David Allen’s Getting Things Done book has endured is because it focuses on contexts. This is a form of compartmentalization where you only do work you can work on.

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For instance, if a piece of work needs a computer, you would only look at the work when you were in front of a computer. If you were driving, you cannot do that work, so you would not be looking at it.

Choose one thing to focus on

To get better at compartmentalizing, look around your environment and seek out places where you can do specific types of work.

Taking your dog for a walk could be the time you focus solely on solving project problems, commuting to and from work could be the time you spend reading and developing your skills and the time between 10 am and 12 pm could be the time you spend on the phone sorting out client issues.

Once you make the decision about when and where you will do the different types of work, make it stick. Schedule it. Once it becomes a habit, you are well on your way to using the power of compartmentalization to become more productive.

Comparmentalization saves you stress

Compartmentalization is a skill that gives you time to deal with issues and work to the exclusion of all other distractions.

This means you get more work done in less time and this allows you to spend more time with the people you want to spend more time with, doing the things you want to spend more time doing.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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