Advertising
Advertising

10 Reasons Not to Get Married While You’re In Debt

10 Reasons Not to Get Married While You’re In Debt

Love. Pure, unabashed, crazy love. It makes people want to do courageous and life-altering things.

Like get married.

For many, there is nothing better than having a best friend and life partner. Unfortunately, for at least half the world’s married population, marriage won’t last forever. The issues leading to divorce are varied and complex.

I can tell you one thing, in my experience as a Phoenix divorce attorney, by far, the top reason leading to divorce is stress over money.

If you want to get married and stay married, talk with your significant other about money before you walk down the aisle. If you or your partner is saddled with a mountain of debt, consider NOT getting married just yet. Here’s why:

1. The best way to start a marriage is “fresh.”

No, we don’t live in a perfect world. Yes, there is some debt that is “good” debt (maybe like student loan debt), and yes, there is some debt that might not be paid off until you are on your deathbed (like student loan debt). Before getting married, talk with your partner about the debt that you each have, whether that debt is “good” or “bad” and whether you should put a wedding on hold until you pay all, some or most of it off.

Advertising

Entering into a marriage with a boatload of already existing “bad” debt is overwhelming. Instead of focusing on your financial future together, your energy will be spent figuring out how to manage money messes created in “another life.”

2. You want to have resources available when emergency strikes.

Have you ever been in a situation where just as you were getting ahead financially, your car died and you had to pay for expensive repairs? Yep. Thought so. We’ve all been there.

Already having a mountain of debt could affect your ability to get an emergency loan for that car or roof repair. In other words, if you are forced to pay your mechanic for an engine overhaul instead of paying the Best Buy credit card bill, you can bet your bottom dollar one thing will happen:

Stress and tension in the marriage will go through the roof when the bill collectors start a ringin’.

3. Being in debt could be a sign of a deeper, emotional issue.

Just like alcoholism, spending can be an addiction. A spending “problem” doesn’t mean a person isn’t “good.” It could, however, mean a person is satisfying an emotional need by heading to the casino with credit cards in hand every weekend. As with any other addiction, the one with the “problem” has to acknowledge the “problem” to begin the recovery process. The failure to admit a problem while single-handedly causing the financial destruction of your relationship or your partner’s credit will certainly doom the marriage.

4. The excessive debt of one party could be a sign that you don’t share the same values.

When you are feeling that crazy high you get from being in love, you might overlook something big: similar values over spending and money.

Advertising

You and your partner are different people. You can learn from each other. However, before tying the knot, have a frank discussion over your respective spending philosophies, how you will spend as a couple, and what your financial goals are for the relationship.

Doing this before getting married will either get you more into alignment on finances…or not. Either way, you will be walking into a marriage with open eyes over the spending values of your partner. That will put you one step ahead of many couples.

5. A large amount of debt can be an obstacle when trying to buy a house, car, or major shared purchase.

People get married to build a life together. Most individuals believe that with a partner, they can build something bigger and greater than they could alone. Imagine the shock and disappointment that will happen when one person learns they (the couple) can’t qualify for a home loan because of the high debt-to-income ratio of one spouse.

When you and your partner are talking about your mutual financial future, consider whether debt already exists and whether being in debt could affect the realization of your shared financial dreams.

6. In many places in the United States, a partner is “on the hook” for the spending of the spouse whether the partner knew about the spending or not.

Regardless of whether the spending is caused by a lack of shared financial values or an addiction, debt could plague both parties during the marriage and after the marriage is over. Depending on the laws of your state, if your partner made it a habit to max out credit cards for designer handbags or trips to the spa, in the event of divorce, you could be on the hook for paying some of that debt back…even if you had no idea it was happening!

The fact that you or your partner has racked up significant debt when you are dating could be a clue that a problem exists and needs to be addressed.

Advertising

7. If your spouse has children from another relationship, back child support debt could lead to the examination of YOUR finances.

A person might be the best parent on the planet. That same person could have a gigantic judgment against him or her for child support arrearages. Depending on your jurisdiction, the failure to pay child support without a good reason could lead to serious penalties (which could include incarceration).

In evaluating the reasons for the failure to pay child support, a court will want to examine a person’s whole financial picture. This picture could include the standard of living as evidenced by joint bank account statements and joint tax returns. This will likely make one spouse feel exposed, violated and stressed out, things which are not good for the overall health of the relationship.

8. If you and your spouse plan to start a family, prepare for large chunks of money to begin leaving your bank account immediately.

Before a woman gives birth, she can bet her bottom dollar that her OB/GYN will want a guarantee of payment (or payment in full) for the delivery before it happens. Even if you have insurance and are responsible for a small portion of the whole cost of the birth, your out-of-pocket expense could still be thousands of dollars. In the months and weeks after the birth, expect to receive bills from other medical providers for blood tests, hearing tests, and various unexpected types of tests.

This is just the beginning!

Before getting married and having kids, deal with payment of that Visa bill so you can devote all your resources to the birth and care of your children. When the kids come, that is what you’ll want. That is what they’ll deserve.

9. Borrowing money to pay debt down during marriage could negatively affect important relationships.

In cases when disaster does strike during marriage and people aren’t able to make ends meet because of unpaid debt, they turn to family and friends. If a family member or friend is not able to help by giving a loan, this could cause tension in the relationship, especially if either side harbors resentment over the loan request or the failure to lend.

Advertising

If the friend or family member does lend the money, bad feelings happen when the money isn’t paid back in the time period promised (or at all). What inevitably results from a broken promise to pay will be a damaged relationship with one or some of the most important people in your lives.

This could lead to isolation, depression and general unhappiness, all of which will affect your relationship with your partner.

10. If you are planning a special wedding ceremony, prepare to accumulate more debt.

The average cost of a wedding in the U.S. is over $25,000. Some people are lucky enough to have parents who will foot the entire bill. Other couples pay for their weddings themselves.

If you and your partner are “on your own,” no matter how small you keep it, things will get pricey. The wedding industry is profitable for those in it and much to your surprise, you could be charged extra for something as simple as the type of chair you want your guests to sit in at the reception. If you plan to have a formal to-do for your once in a lifetime event, reduce the stress by paying down the existing debt first.

If you do decide to say “I do”, do you want your marriage to survive? If so, make a choice to be proactive about your debt and money situation with your soon-to-be spouse. By heading these issues off at the pass, you increase the chances that you and your partner will live a long, happy and financially secure future…together!

More by this author

12 Reasons to Never Regret Any Decision You Ever Make 12 Reasons You Should Never Regret Any Decision You Ever Make married couples 8 Things Happily Married Couples Do Differently The 10 Best Things Every Mother Ever Told Her Child 5 Toxic Beliefs That Can End Any Relationship How to Stop Letting Emotions Zap Your Energy How to Stop Letting Your Emotions Zap Your Energy

Trending in Money

1 Life Insurance: A Secure Way To Protect Your Future. 2 How To Save Money On Groceries: 13 Quick Tips 3 10 Investment Tips For Beginners 4 Top 6 Hacks on How To Build Credit Fast 5 Want to Get Free Product Samples Like Bloggers and Beauty Gurus Do? Read This.

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on March 29, 2021

Life Insurance: A Secure Way To Protect Your Future.

Life Insurance: A Secure Way To Protect Your Future.

Life is a journey full of ups and downs. No one can actually predict what might happen the next moment; there are times where the happiest moments do not even take a second to turn into the gravest. Planning for your future can help you face such unwelcomed but irrepressible situations with much ease. We all want to make every memorable event of our life more special and to cherish all those moments happily and worry less, you must financially plan your future. But no one has control over life and death. Who would wish to see his family suffer in his absence? Insurance hands over the financial jeopardy of life’s happenings to an insurance company.

Importance of getting a life insurance

No one has control over life and death. Nobody would like to see their family suffering in an absence, and that’s why many people recommend life insurance. A life insurance plan is one of the best ways to secure the future of your family, even against those financial troubles after an untimely demise. These plans are safe and credible, and you could trust them for your family’s better future.

Advertising

On the other hand, a life insurance policy is a contract between a company (insurance provider) and policyholder in which the insurance provider ensures to pay a certain amount of money to the nominated beneficiary in case of the policyholder’s death during the term of the agreement. There are different types of insurance plans, and it is important for you to know the benefits of those plans such as a funeral, medical or some life expenses provided they are mentioned in the agreement.

Choosing the right insurance plan

If you’re about to select an insurance plan, you should consider some important factors:

Advertising

  • The time at which you start investing in a program and the number of family members you want to get insured. Obviously, a married man with two children has different needs compared to a single one. The number of persons who are dependent on an individual also varies from person to person.
  • The next thing you need to consider is you and your family needs. What are your child’s dream, your retirement plans, for how long would your dependents need financial support, any personal injury, etc. And do not forget those events or situations that will surely demand a huge sum of money.
  • The next thing one must consider is your current income. You should preferably choose a plan which you can afford.

Now you must be having a pretty clear idea of how to choose the best plan for you. Further, you should also compare various plans offered by different companies and numerous sites available online that help will you to compare them.

Differences between life insurance plans

Here’s a short brief of some plan categories you can choose according to your needs:

Advertising

  • Term Insurance Plan – You have to pay once, and your nominee gets the paid money under your misfortune demise. It ensures a person for a fixed time. If you survive the policy period, you do not get your premiums back.
  • Whole Life Policy – This plan continues for your lifetime. Under this, the policyholder has to pay regular premiums, until their death.
  • Endowment Policy –  In case the individual dies during the tenure, the beneficiary gets the amount assured. If the person survives the policy tenure, they gets back the premiums paid with other investment returns along with several other benefits.
  • Money Back Policy – In this a portion of the money invested is returned to the investor at regular intervals. If you survive the insurance term you get the entire amount back; else the beneficiary receives the entire sum assured.
  • ULIPs – These are the life insurance plans that offer you future security plus wealth creation options.

Many people do not opt for whole life policy and endowment policy because of the high amount of money you need to pay, while others may prefer to opt for these if they have a high life expectancy. Surely you will find the best one for you.

So what are you waiting for? Plan for your future and live a happier and carefree life today.

Advertising

Featured photo credit: aryehsampson.com via aryehsampson.com

Read Next