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30 Movies You Should Watch Before 40

30 Movies You Should Watch Before 40

Movies are a brilliant way to teleport yourself into a different story where you have a different life in a different place with a whole lot of different people and out of the millions of movies out there, this list has picked out a little bit of everything so by the time you’re 40 you can say you know a little something about everything from the cult classics to the rom-coms. I have to say there are so many movies that could’ve made my list as I’m sure you’ve all seen many great ones you’d recommend, but still, it might be worth giving this smoothie of genres and decades a watch too if they sound like your cup of tea (or your bucket of popcorn!)

Classics

1. Fight Club (1999)

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    I’m starting with this cult classic because it’s an absolute favorite. The story revolves around an unnamed protagonist who in an attempt to overcome his struggles with masculinity and consumerism, starts a fight club “as a radical form of psychotherapy”. This movie is best watched without any spoilers, so don’t go around looking it up. Just watch it. Seriously.

    2. The Godfather (1972)

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      Who hasn’t heard of The Godfather. This film revolves around the outbreak of a gang war set in the late 1940’s that took place in NYC. The Godfather has been widely regarded as one of the “greatest films in world cinema” and as one of the most influential. If that’s not enough to sell it to you, I don’t know what will.

      3. Forrest Gump (1994)

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        Seems to be a recurring theme with movies based on novels. Starring the marvelous Tom Hanks, the story shows the naïve Forrest Gump’s life throughout several decades, who witnesses and even takes part in some of the most memorable events of the late 20th century. It’s such a light-hearted film but might make you feel a lot of things. In conclusion, it’s definitely a must-watch.

        4. Pulp Fiction (1994)

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          This Quentin Tarantino comedy crime masterpiece is a classic. With its ironic mix of violence and humor and lots of pop culture references this movie was nominated for 7 Oscars. Starring John Travolta, Samuel L. Jackson and Uma Thurman, Pulp Fiction connects the story lines of LA mobsters, fringe players, small-time criminals and the mysterious briefcase. This movie could be broken down and analysed forever but the best way to get into all those interesting analytical discussions, is to give it a watch.

          5. Psycho (1960)

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            A classics list would be incomplete without Hitchcock. Once again based on a novel, this film is about Marion Crane, a secretary who ends up at a motel after embezzling money from an employer and the motel’s disturbed owner manager. It has been said to have “set a new level of acceptability for violence, deviant behavior and sexuality in American films” and the US Library of Congress said it was “culturally, historically or aesthetically significant.” Convinced?

            Drama

            6. The Shawshank Redemption (1994)

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              Banker Andy Dufresne is convicted of a double murder even though he continues to proclaim his innocence. He’s then sentenced to a life time in Shawshank State Prison where he meets “Red” and faces the ugly realities of prison life. Think a little Orange Is The New Black? Or maybe not! If you’ve liked American History X, City of God or Trainspotting then this is definitely your type.

              7. One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest (1975)

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                Along the vibes of The Truman Show and a little American Beauty, this movie is one of Nicholson’s best. McMurphy escapes prison by pleading insanity and when sent to a ward for the mentally unstable, he both endures and witnesses the abuse and degradation of the Nurse Ratched and of course, the nurse must be taken down. Great plot line and also – surprise, surprise! – based on a book.

                8. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

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                  One of my absolute favorites. You have Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet at one of their finest moments playing the intriguing Joel and Clementine. This is also another that is best watched without any spoilers but the gist of it is that Clementine applies to undergo a procedure to erase Joel from her memories but the experience in itself allows them to truly understand what they had in the first place. Filled with beautiful quotes and really intriguing moments, this one is a top recommendation for the indie film lovers out there.

                  9. Her (2013)

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                    I was wondering whether I should add a new film to the list or not but this list would be incomplete without Her. In a world where artificially intelligent operating systems have become accessible to everyone and are designed to have a conscious, Theodore finds himself developing a very unlikely relationship with his OS, Samantha. This film truly touches on our dependency when it comes to technology and what our possible dystopia/utopia could look like. Very thought provoking.

                    10. American Beauty (1999)

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                      This one is a true classic. With the brilliant Kevin Spacy as Lester Burnham, a depressed suburban father struggling with a mid-life crisis, American Beauty truly explores the life of suburban America from the housewife archetype to the American dream with just the perfect amount of nostalgic vibes for the modern viewer.

                      War

                      11. Saving Private Ryan (1998)

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                        Following the invasion of Normandy, two brothers lay dead while in New Guinea a third brother has been killed fighting the Japanese. After the Army General Staff learns that a fourth brothers missing in the French countryside, a rescue mission is sent to find the young soldier and return him home. This mission to “Save Private Ryan” is a thrilling, although intensely graphic journey.

                        12. Full Metal Jacket (1987)

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                          Full Metal Jacket, directed by Stanley Kubrick, is a war film about the dehumanization of U.S. recruits in the Vietnam War both in the brutal boot camps to the streets in Hue. Focused on the Tet Offensive, this film is a great look back into history with all its grim bits left in.

                          13. Platoon (1986)

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                            Following the theme of the Vietnam War, Platoon is the first film of a trilogy of Vietnam War films by Oliver Stone and is based on Stone’s own experiences as a U.S. infantryman  in contrast with John Wayne’s vision of the war as portrayed in The Green Berets. It’s also the first Hollywood film to be written and directed by a veteran of the war in Vietnam.

                            14. 300 (2007)

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                              300 is an American fantasy action film based on the 1998 comic series of the same name by Frank Miller and Lynn Varley, which is a retelling of the Battle of Thermopylae. The plot is about King Leonidas who leads 300 Spartans into battle against the Persian Xerxes. Definitely a classic and one that I have watched one too many times.

                              15. Schindler’s List (1993)

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                                The first time I watched this movie was for History class and when I got home I decided to watch the full thing and boy was I not disappointed. Schindler’s List is considered an “epic historical drama film” directed and co-produced by the legendary Spielbrg. The story is based on the life of Oskar Schindler who was a German businessman who saved more than a thousand Polish-Jewish refugees during the Holocaust.

                                Action

                                16. Léon: The Professional (1994)

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                                  This English-language French thriller film is about Mathilda, a 12-year-old girl played by a young – and brilliant – Natalie Portman, who is taken in by a mob hit man after her family is murdered. The film revolves around the formation of an unusual relationship between Mathilda and the hit man as she becomes his protégée making it a very interesting watch.

                                  17. Kill Bill (2003)

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                                    Another Quentin Tarantino creation. The movie follows “The Bride”, a former member of an assassination team who seeks revenge on her ex-colleagues who massacred members of her wedding party and tried to kill her along with them. If you like a little crazy, go for it.

                                    18. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

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                                      Who hasn’t heard of The Lord of the Rings? Set in Middle-earth, the Dark Lord Sauron is seeking the One Ring which has found its way to the hobbit Frodo. The film was highly acclaimed to be “an achievement in the fantasy film genre and has continued to feature on critics’ lists of the greatest fantasy films ever made. If you’ve been hesitant about watching the series or just want to know what the heck the buzz is about, then I suggest you just dive in.

                                      19. The Matrix (1999)

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                                        I refuse to turn 40 without getting the millions of Matrix references and I bet you do too. For all of you curious to know what the buzz is about, The Matrix is set in a dystopian future in which reality is actually simulated (and called “The Matrix”) created by these sentient machines to subdue the human population while their bodies’ heat is used as an energy source. Pretty morbid huh?

                                        20. X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

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                                          Another recent one I thought I might as well add to keep the time periods of the list diverse. Directed by Bryan Singer, Days of Future Past is the seventh installment of the X-Men film series and the sequel to both X-Men: First Class and X-Men: The Last Stand. If superhero films are your thing and you’re all for Marvel, then go watch it now!

                                          Thriller

                                          21. Memento (2000)

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                                            Memento is a psychological thriller about Leonard Shelby who suffers of anterograde amnesia which damages his ability to store new memories and has developed a system for recollection using hand-written notes, tattoos and Polaroid photos. This one requires a little attention, so it’s not the film to multi-task doing something else while watching because it’s more than what it seems.

                                            22. The Dark Knight (2008)

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                                              This list would be incomplete without BATMAN. This is for you DC lovers. The film is the sequel to Batman Begins and there’s not much to say about this except the fact that it is the home of one of Heath Ledger’s best performances ever. So watch it whether superheroes are your jam or not because I guarantee you Heath Ledger will make it worth your time.

                                              23. Vertigo (1958)

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                                                Alfred Hitchcock is back once again. The film revolves around former police detective John Ferguson who is forced into early retirement because an incident has caused him to develop acrophobia, which is the extreme fear of heights, and vertigo, which is a sensation of false, rotational movement. It’s also the first film to utilize the dolly zoom, an in-camera effect that distorts perspective to create disorientation which is now often referred to as “the Vertigo effect” after the movie!

                                                24. Cabin in the Woods (2012)

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                                                  A little warning about this film is don’t watch it if you’re scared of clowns. I know this from personal experience. This is a satirical horror film about five friends who go for a break at a remote cabin in the woods where they “discover the truth behind the cabin.” Trust me, the film will sell itself better than I ever will. Being satirical and having lots of thought put into the consideration of the details it’s an intriguing watch if you pay attention.

                                                  25. Shutter Island (2010)

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                                                    This list cannot be complete without Leonardo DiCaprio who stars as U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels who is investigating the disappearance of a murderess who escaped from a hospital for the criminally insane and finds himself in one roller coaster of a journey leading him to doubt everything from his memory, his partner and even his own sanity. Brilliant movie.

                                                    Rom-Coms

                                                    26. Bridget Jones’s Diary (2001)

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                                                      Another one based on a book, this film is a lighthearted watch about a British woman who decides to keep a personal diary in order to improve her health, her job and her love life. It’s such a relatable story and will definitely motivate you to get your New Year’s Resolutions together and start your own Diary!

                                                      27. Clueless (1995)

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                                                        Cher Horowitz is the Queen Bee of high school in Beverly Hills but not in a “Mean Girls” way more in a witty, charming and intelligent way. Cher Horowitz taught me never to settle for anything less than what I deserve and the entire film just discusses aspects of teenage life that most people sugarcoat or just think are too trivial to even talk about. Also, their fashion is on point therefore Clueless holds a special place in my heart.

                                                        28. (500) Days of Summer (2009)

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                                                          To most, this is immediately seen as a cliche, but if the viewers were to look deeper into the characters and how they’re presented to us, (500) Days of Summer becomes a whole lot more interesting. Summer played by the perfect-for-this-role Zooey Deschanel doesn’t believe in love but is also very difficult to draw any conclusions from as she’s only seen through Tom’s eyes who is insanely infatuated with her that he refuses to believe she might not be the girl he’s destined for.

                                                          29. 10 Things I Hate About You (1999)

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                                                            Did you know that this film was adapted from William Shakespeare’s play “The Taming of the Shrew”? Well now you know! This film handles the ridiculous cliches of high school so expertly making it so believable and the cast is fabulous with the one and only Heath Ledger rising above the rest.

                                                            30. Annie Hall (1977)

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                                                              Directed by Woody Allen and starring Allen as Alvy Singer, who is trying to figure out the reasons for the failure of his relationship with Annie, played by Diane Keaton who actually had the role written specifically for her. The film discusses love, sexuality and Jewish identity which I feel is a great film to end this list with as it has a more serious approach despite being part of the usually trivialized rom com genre.

                                                              Featured photo credit: http://sagaranando.blogspot.com/2013/08/top-30-filmes-preferidos-lucas-1.html via 4.bp.blogspot.com

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                                                              Last Updated on July 10, 2020

                                                              How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

                                                              How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

                                                              We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

                                                              We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

                                                              So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

                                                              Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

                                                              What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

                                                              Boundaries are limits

                                                              —they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

                                                              Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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                                                              Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

                                                              Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

                                                              Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

                                                              How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

                                                              Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

                                                              1. Self-Awareness Comes First

                                                              Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

                                                              You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

                                                              To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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                                                              You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

                                                              • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
                                                              • When do you feel disrespected?
                                                              • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
                                                              • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
                                                              • When do you want to be alone?
                                                              • How much space do you need?

                                                              You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

                                                              2. Clear Communication Is Essential

                                                              Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

                                                              Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

                                                              3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

                                                              Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

                                                              That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

                                                              Sample language:

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                                                              • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
                                                              • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
                                                              • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
                                                              • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
                                                              • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
                                                              • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
                                                              • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

                                                              Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

                                                              4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

                                                              Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

                                                              Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

                                                              Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

                                                              We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

                                                              It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

                                                              It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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                                                              Final Thoughts

                                                              Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

                                                              Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

                                                              Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

                                                              The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

                                                              Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

                                                              Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

                                                              They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

                                                              Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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