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20 Frustrations In Life You Need To Let Go Of

20 Frustrations In Life You Need To Let Go Of

You have heard the saying, “There is no use crying over spilled milk.” When it comes to stress and anxiety, many times we are our own worst enemy. We grip on to events that we really need to let go of. We have locked ourselves into a prison of hurt and yet we also hold the key. Furthermore, stress has been shown to be incredibly bad for not only your emotional and psychological health, but also your physical health.

Here are 20 frustrations in life to let go of:

1. When you knew you were right.

Things were going to turn out just as you had predicted, but nobody listened. All that damage could have been spared and avoided had they only listened. It is a double hurt because you do not feel respected, and now you do not respect them. Try to remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes.

2. Your ‘ugly’ body part.

Nobody is perfect. The fact that supermodels still see flaws in themselves just confirms that if you look hard enough, you will inevitably find something you are not happy about. Embrace your flaws—they are what makes you unique.

3. The joke that went too far.

And you were the butt of it. There is a fine line between funny and offensive. If they really went beyond the line, then you may want to talk to them in private—even though every part of you wants to punch them in public. Most likely the person did not intend to take the joke too far.

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4. Getting cut off while driving.

No need to become another road rage statistic. It does not matter what country you are driving in, there are always going to be reckless people on the road. At the same time, you never know who is racing to the hospital about to have a baby!

5. When you did not get the credit you deserve.

Even worse when someone else got all the glory. Work toward finding more contentment and appreciation in your own personal accomplishments. Break free from the need to be approved by others.

6. Not taking that chance.

That seeming once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and you did not grab it. Now all you have is that bitter scar of regret. It may be a fairytale-ish saying, but it is true: “If you love something, set it free, if it returns, it was meant to be.”

7. Bad restaurant food.

It is always a risk going to a new restaurant—even when you order your trusted favorite dish, it can turn out to be a disaster. By all means tell the waiter or waitress that you thought it was terrible, most likely they will give you a different meal. But certainly do not let it dampen the conversation and company of those you are with, especially if you are on a date!

8. Not paying someone back.

You were broke and going through a tough financial time, and the years have since passed. Now there is a rift in the relationship and money is not going to help. Do not be afraid to acknowledge that you messed up to a person to whom you owe money. Maybe send them a gift or a card.

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9. When you said too much.

You try to catch the words but they have already fled from your mouth. You are dumbfounded at the stupidity of what you just said. If they are a true friend though, they will get over it. It happens to the brightest.

10. The cooking disaster.

Ever tried to impress someone with a home-cooked meal and your dog would not even eat it? That is why there are so many takeout or home-delivery places these days. Make the phone call.

11. When you were lied to.

Betrayal is brutal. Like getting sucker punched. Remember that old saying, “Hurt people hurt people?” Rather than punch them back, you could really catch them off guard by asking them what is happening in their life that caused them to do that. You may even free them from some deep-rooted pain.

12. The spending spree.

You make an excited purchase but about a month later you are filled with regret because you never used the item. Redeem the experience and donate the item to someone who really needs it. Most places will still give you a store credit as well.

13. When you did not stand up for something.

You feel like a coward. What that person said was offensive and you should have put them in their place. But the momentary pacifism does not have to linger and keep you trapped in frustration. Forgive yourself and be more intentional next time.

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14. Not keeping promises.

Our intentions sometimes get the better of our actions. It is certainly much better not to make lofty unfulfilled promises, but rather to quietly carry out what you intended to do. It is better to underpromise and overdeliver than overpromise and underdeliver.

15. Traffic Jams.

Rather than have you blood boil over the road work or the accident, use the time to reflect a little. Just breathe. If traffic is at a complete standstill then make a phone call or step out of your car.

16. Getting fired.

Or being made redundant. Circumstances can be very unfair. But perhaps that job was not the right one for you. Use this time off to think about what really excites you and begin to pursue that.

17. What the bully said in 5th grade.

Words do hurt, often more than sticks and stones. But the only reason why the effects linger is because you keep letting the words run through your mind. A helpful way to get rid of toxic thoughts is to imagine writing the words on a piece of paper and then tearing it up.

18. When you gave up too soon.

The light was clearly at the end of the tunnel, if only you pushed that little bit further you would have made it. But for whatever reason, you crumbled. Learn from your mistakes. Figure out where you went wrong. There is always another race.

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19. Saying, “I love you.”

Whether you said it when you did not mean it, or you did not say it when you needed to. The moment passes and you are willing for it to return. Do not try to re-create the moment. You cannot force those moments. But if it was the right moment, then it will return. Just be prepared.

20. Irony.

All captured brilliantly in that song by Alanis Morissette, Ironic: “It’s like rain on your wedding day, It’s a free ride when you’ve already paid, It’s the good advice that you just didn’t take.” Life is indeed full of providential paradoxes. Rather than fight fate, it is probably better to embrace it.

There is one major element that ties all of these 20 points together, and that is forgiveness. The ability to forgive yourself and the ability to forgive others. Frustrations are dissolved through healing. Healing happens when the pain disappears. So whether the pain was caused by yourself or caused by the other person, find a way to let go.

Featured photo credit: girl blowing dandelion by AnnaOmelchenko via stockfresh.com

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Thai Nguyen

Thai's a Mindfulness-Meditation Coach, a 5-Star Chef and an International Kickboxer.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.

your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have

    Why You Need a Vision

    Experts and life success stories support the idea that with a vision in mind, you are more likely to succeed far beyond what you could otherwise achieve without a clear vision. Think of crafting your life vision as mapping a path to your personal and professional dreams. Life satisfaction and personal happiness are within reach. The harsh reality is that if you don’t develop your own vision, you’ll allow other people and circumstances to direct the course of your life.

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    How to Create Your Life Vision

    Don’t expect a clear and well-defined vision overnight—envisioning your life and determining the course you will follow requires time, and reflection. You need to cultivate vision and perspective, and you also need to apply logic and planning for the practical application of your vision. Your best vision blossoms from your dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It will resonate with your values and ideals, and will generate energy and enthusiasm to help strengthen your commitment to explore the possibilities of your life.

    What Do You Want?

    The question sounds deceptively simple, but it’s often the most difficult to answer. Allowing yourself to explore your deepest desires can be very frightening. You may also not think you have the time to consider something as fanciful as what you want out of life, but it’s important to remind yourself that a life of fulfillment does not usually happen by chance, but by design.

    It’s helpful to ask some thought-provoking questions to help you discover the possibilities of what you want out of life. Consider every aspect of your life, personal and professional, tangible and intangible. Contemplate all the important areas, family and friends, career and success, health and quality of life, spiritual connection and personal growth, and don’t forget about fun and enjoyment.

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    Some tips to guide you:

    • Remember to ask why you want certain things
    • Think about what you want, not on what you don’t want.
    • Give yourself permission to dream.
    • Be creative. Consider ideas that you never thought possible.
    • Focus on your wishes, not what others expect of you.

    Some questions to start your exploration:

    • What really matters to you in life? Not what should matter, what does matter.
    • What would you like to have more of in your life?
    • Set aside money for a moment; what do you want in your career?
    • What are your secret passions and dreams?
    • What would bring more joy and happiness into your life?
    • What do you want your relationships to be like?
    • What qualities would you like to develop?
    • What are your values? What issues do you care about?
    • What are your talents? What’s special about you?
    • What would you most like to accomplish?
    • What would legacy would you like to leave behind?

    It may be helpful to write your thoughts down in a journal or creative vision board if you’re the creative type. Add your own questions, and ask others what they want out of life. Relax and make this exercise fun. You may want to set your answers aside for a while and come back to them later to see if any have changed or if you have anything to add.

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    What Would Your Best Life Look Like?

    Describe your ideal life in detail. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, and create a vivid picture. If you can’t visualize a picture, focus on how your best life would feel. If you find it difficult to envision your life 20 or 30 years from now, start with five years—even a few years into the future will give you a place to start. What you see may surprise you. Set aside preconceived notions. This is your chance to dream and fantasize.

    A few prompts to get you started:

    • What will you have accomplished already?
    • How will you feel about yourself?
    • What kind of people are in your life? How do you feel about them?
    • What does your ideal day look like?
    • Where are you? Where do you live? Think specifics, what city, state, or country, type of community, house or an apartment, style and atmosphere.
    • What would you be doing?
    • Are you with another person, a group of people, or are you by yourself?
    • How are you dressed?
    • What’s your state of mind? Happy or sad? Contented or frustrated?
    • What does your physical body look like? How do you feel about that?
    • Does your best life make you smile and make your heart sing? If it doesn’t, dig deeper, dream bigger.

    It’s important to focus on the result, or at least a way-point in your life. Don’t think about the process for getting there yet—that’s the next stepGive yourself permission to revisit this vision every day, even if only for a few minutes. Keep your vision alive and in the front of your mind.

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    Plan Backwards

    It may sound counter-intuitive to plan backwards rather than forwards, but when you’re planning your life from the end result, it’s often more useful to consider the last step and work your way back to the first. This is actually a valuable and practical strategy for making your vision a reality.

    • What’s the last thing that would’ve had to happen to achieve your best life?
    • What’s the most important choice you would’ve had to make?
    • What would you have needed to learn along the way?
    • What important actions would you have had to take?
    • What beliefs would you have needed to change?
    • What habits or behaviors would you have had to cultivate?
    • What type of support would you have had to enlist?
    • How long will it have taken you to realize your best life?
    • What steps or milestones would you have needed to reach along the way?

    Now it’s time to think about your first step, and the next step after that. Ponder the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in the future. It may seem impossible, but it’s quite achievable if you take it step-by-step.

    It’s important to revisit this vision from time to time. Don’t be surprised if your answers to the questions, your technicolor vision, and the resulting plans change. That can actually be a very good thing; as you change in unforeseeable ways, the best life you envision will change as well. For now, it’s important to use the process, create your vision, and take the first step towards making that vision a reality.

    Featured photo credit: Matt Noble via unsplash.com

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