“I’m single because I was born that way.” – Mae West
Are you worried about being single and coping with all those rather nosy questions about your status? Numerically, no need to worry at all because one in two people in Manhattan are actually single. Nationwide that adds up to 100 million people and growing, according to the Census Bureau.
Guess what? Numbers apart, if you are single, you are much more likely to do better in your career, be more sociable, be healthier and also do voluntary work. These are the findings of Eric Klinenberg, a sociologist who wrote a book called Going Solo.
Still not convinced? Read on because I am going to list 10 reasons why there is nothing wrong with being single. Welcome to singledom.
1. Because you relish your freedom and independence
This goes for both singles and divorced women. Studies done at the Kingston University in London found that women following divorce were happier than they had ever been (for up to 5 years) after divorce. Being free of any awkward and messy ties was a big part of this. As for singles, you never have to ask your partner or spouse before deciding anything. You are totally free to spend money as you please, go to bed when you want to, and watch that late night film without having to negotiate anyone’s permission.
2. Because you know what you want
One of the reasons for so many unhappy marriages and long –term relationships is that the fear of loneliness took over when deciding to get hitched. This means that many singles made the wrong choice. But you know what you want in a partner and you are not going to compromise just because of parental and peer pressure. No, your standards are not too high and don’t let anyone try to persuade you otherwise.
3. Because you are happy
You have enough interests, friends and job satisfaction to keep you going for a long time yet. You are happy when alone and think of it as ‘restorative solitude’, rather than a negative feeling. Above all, you feel that you are self fulfilled as a single entity. You are also keenly aware that the happiness of married men and women has been steadily declining over the last three decades as a University of Pennsylvania study has shown. Marriage does not always mean happiness and one study of over 1,000 couples found that marriage was a ‘blip’ and had no long term effect on happiness.
4. Because you know your limits and defects
You have enough self awareness to know that you are not the Mr or Ms Perfect. You are well aware of your defects and how they could be obstacles in a long lasting relationship. Above all, you are able to forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made in the past but you do not let these pollute your outlook on life.
5. Because you enjoy the financial benefits
Have you ever thought why so much marketing is aimed at singles? They have done their homework and like you are aware of the enormous scope for spending when in singledom. You can spend much more on fitness, clothes and holidays than you would if you were married. You do better financially when buying a house and also in planning retirement benefits. You can also save up to 5 percent of monthly salary according to Forbes magazine.
6. Because you can really appreciate your family and friends
“A single rose can be my garden – a single friend, my world .” – Leo Buscaglia
If you have maintained a healthy and affectionate relationship with your family, you really appreciate them. In addition, your friends are just as important to you as your immediate family is. If you are a woman, you have a greater capacity for making friendships with other women. Men have more difficulty in bonding with other men.
7. Because you can really work on your career
Family obligations for men and women are not always recognized in the workplace. They should be of course, and ought not to be a barrier to having a brilliant career. Recent legislation in the USA is now concentrating on how this can be eradicated.
While singles often have to take care of elderly parents, they are in many ways free of other responsibilities such as bearing and rearing children.
While you are aware of the favorable bias towards married people with children in the workplace, you are not let that going to stop you. You are the one who is free to read, study and attend extra training skills programs. You will never have to ask your spouse for permission. Being single is going to really help you in your career.
8. Because you are healthier and will live longer
Most experts have reported that marriage can help you live longer. But this is not always true as a lot depends on the lifestyle and the mental stability of the partners in any marriage. But look at these advantages:
- You have a much better quality of sleep being single. No worries about having to put up with snoring.
- You do not need to spend much time on housework.
- You have more time for fitness, running and the gym.
- You are much less likely to suffer from stress because of family problems, children and marital conflicts.
- You have more time for friends than married people.
- You can have fabulous holidays without being encumbered by a family in tow.
9. You are in total control
Enjoying singledom means discovering yourself, your passions, what you really appreciate and what makes you happy. Being yourself is the great benefit when you are in total control. There is another wonderful advantage in that moving house, changing job and relocating all become so much easier when you are the one who decides.
10. You can always change your mind
The greatest advantage of all is that you have the wonderful option of changing your mind, should you want to opt for a more long term relationship or even marriage. Nobody can dictate when, how or with whom you could do this. You haven’t signed anything yet!
“As a body everyone is single, as a soul never.”– Hermann Hesse
Let us know why you are happy or unhappy being single in the comments below.
Featured photo credit: Single tree/Martin Fisch via flickr.com