Advertising
Advertising

The 10 Best Things Every Mother Ever Told Her Child

The 10 Best Things Every Mother Ever Told Her Child

Whether or not we realize it, most of us operate on default based upon the messages our parents communicated to us as children. If we were lucky enough to have folks who made it their mission to empower us, the chances are better that we take a sense of high self-esteem into the world every day. As we groom our own children to become the planet’s future leaders, remember that what we tell them will influence how they show up for life. Keeping that in mind, here are the 10 best things every mother ever told her child:

1. “I love you.”

There are people in this world who don’t ever hear their parents say, “I love you.” We all want to hear it. We all need to feel it. Not hearing the words, “I love you,” could impair a child’s future ability to express love and affection to others, causing the cycle to repeat.

What the world needs now is love, sweet love.” We each have the chance to make that happen. We can start by telling the child in our lives that we love them…every day.

2. “You can do it.”

In the eyes and heart of a child, the smallest of things can look and feel scarier than they should (Santa Claus, for example). A mother who tells her child they “can do it” is teaching that child to face life’s obstacles with courage and resolve. This child will grow into an adult who will be willing to take risks by looking fear straight in the eye and saying, “Let’s do it!”

The willingness of any individual to keep pushing the boundaries will ensure his or her personal evolution and the expansion of our species. (Think Ben Franklin and the light bulb here!)

Advertising

3. “Everything is going to be OK.”

In today’s world, kids face different challenges than any of us ever could have imagined even a decade ago. Unfortunately, more kids are turning to permanent solutions (like suicide) to solve temporary problems. When your child is going through pain, make them a promise.

Promise your child that if they just hold on, the pain will pass, and everything will be OK. By helping to strengthen your child’s determination when life gets to be too much, you will be empowering them with the sliver of hope we all need to feel sometimes. Your child will also learn hard times aren’t forever, and by experiencing pain, a person can come out the other end stronger, wiser, and happier.

4. “Be kind.”

People can be mean. In fact, sometimes these mean people can be our own siblings. The best way to disarm someone else’s meanness is with kindness.

When your child is dealing with a Mean Girls situation, remind them that responding with unkindness will only breed more hostility and drama. It is important for a child to stand up for themself in a situation where they are being mistreated, but coach your child to do this with dignity and respect. If your child will be placing themself in harm’s way by responding (even with kindness), give your child permission to do what they can to remove the mean person from their life (with your support, if necessary).

5. “Be yourself.”

This is the mantra of many parents. It is, however, difficult for parents to truly allow their kids to be themselves. We sometimes treat our children as though they are here to please us. As a result, we can punish them for acting in ways we don’t approve of, but that might be authentic for them.

Advertising

The fact is that each of us, including our children, are here to realize our own purpose. It’s difficult to let kids make their own ‘mistakes’ when we ‘know’ how things are going to turn out. As parents, we should understand our children’s decisions are necessary for their personal growth. The lessons they learn from acting authentically will be much stronger than any lesson they might learn from parents just telling them ‘how it is’ or how they ‘should’ be.

You can still coach, guide and reprimand your child. However, by giving your kid some freedom to grow into their fullest potential, you give the both of you a gift: the gift of letting go (for you) and the gift of expression (for them).

6. “After you eat your broccoli, it’s time for bed.”

Moms really know what they are talking about here. To keep your body and mind in optimum performance mode, you must take care of yourself by (drumroll)…eating right, getting exercise, and getting enough rest.

Lead your children by example; give yourself the gift of whole, healthy food and adequate sleep. Help your kids in removing the physical, mental and emotional issues that come with poor health and lifestyle choices. Raise your little ones to be thankful for their beautiful, perfect bodies and to treat those bodies with love.

7. “Time out.”

Life isn’t fair. We don’t always get what we want. When this happens to kids, many go into meltdown mode. Actually…this can happen with adults, too; when our plans are derailed by something or someone, it can cause an individual to react out of anger or descend into a bout of despair.

Advertising

When things go sideways, cultivate in your child the value of taking a ‘time out.’ By learning to stop, step back, and breathe, your kid will learn to regroup. A time out will allow your child the chance to consider a different perspective and potentially redefine the situation in a way that works for him or her. The ability to do this as an adult enables us to create our own happiness by choosing how we will manage things that don’t go our way.

8. “Say, ‘Thank you.’”

Raise a child to say, “Thank you,” so they can learn good manners. More importantly though, teach your child to feel gratitude in their heart for every minute of every day. Regardless of what drama and pain might be happening, there is always an opportunity for something greater in that difficult experience. By raising a child to be thankful in the midst of turmoil, you will be nurturing a resilient human with the power to shift any circumstance into something amazing.

9. “Never quit.”

Life can be hard, even for a kid. School gets tough. So do relationships. As we get older, competition for jobs, money and status turns fierce.

Whatever it is your child wants to accomplish, they should remember to keep on trucking even after failure strikes once, twice, or hundreds of times. Your child should understand that just because they haven’t gotten something ‘right’ yet, things aren’t over. Tell your child that if they hold a dream, they should never quit, and should take little steps every day for as long as they have that dream in their heart.

10. “It’s OK to quit.”

Sometimes dreams change. Sometimes we realize we don’t want something we once did. However, sometimes giving up the pursuit of a dream feels like failure even if we really don’t want the dream anymore.

Advertising

Give your child permission to call it quits. Remind them that if they are quitting something because that is what they truly want, there is power in quitting. This will serve your child well as they grow into an adult who wants to make a change—be that from a college major, a job, a career, or a life partner.

If you are a parent, remember the force behind these 10 best things every mother ever told her child. Choose your words wisely. Those words will be largely responsible for your child’s destiny and our collective future on this planet.

Featured photo credit: bright picture of hugging mother and daughter via shutterstock.com

More by this author

12 Reasons to Never Regret Any Decision You Ever Make 12 Reasons You Should Never Regret Any Decision You Ever Make married couples 8 Things Happily Married Couples Do Differently The 10 Best Things Every Mother Ever Told Her Child 5 Toxic Beliefs That Can End Any Relationship How to Stop Letting Emotions Zap Your Energy How to Stop Letting Your Emotions Zap Your Energy

Trending in Communication

1 How to Not Take Things Personally for a Happier Life 2 How to Let Go of Toxic People in Your Life 3 7 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be a Happier Person 4 50 Red Flags You Should Watch for in Your Relationship 5 40 Acts of Kindness to Make the World a Better Place

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on November 26, 2020

How Relationships Building Helps Achieve Career Success

How Relationships Building Helps Achieve Career Success

As playwright Wilson Mizner supposedly said all the way back in the 1930s,

“Be kind to everyone on the way up; you will meet the same people on the way down.”

The adage is the perfect prototype for relationship building in 2020, although we may want to expand Mizner’s definition of “kind” to include being helpful, respectful, grateful, and above all, crediting your colleagues along the way.

5 Ways to Switch on Your Relationship Building Magnetism

Relationship building does not come easily to all. Today’s computer culture makes us more insular and less likely to reach out—not to mention our new work-from-home situation in which we are only able to interact virtually. Still, relationship building remains an important part of career engagement and success, and it gets better with practice.

Here are five ways you can strengthen your relationships:

1. Advocate for Other’s Ideas

Take the initiative to speak up in support of other team members’ good ideas. Doing so lets others know that the team’s success takes precedence over your needs for personal success. Get behind any colleague’s innovative approach or clever solution and offer whatever help you can give to see it through. Teammates will value your vote of confidence and your support.

Advertising

2. Show Compassion

If you learn that someone whom you work with has encountered difficult times, reach out. If it’s not someone you know well, a hand-written card expressing your sympathy and hopes for better times ahead could be an initial gesture. If it’s someone with whom you interact regularly, the act could involve offering to take on some of the person’s work to provide a needed reprieve or even bringing in a home-cooked dish as a way to offer comfort. The show of compassion will not go unnoticed, and your relationship building will have found a foothold.

3. Communicate Regularly

Make an effort to share any information with team members that will help them do their jobs more effectively. Keeping people in the loop says a lot about your consideration for what others need to deliver their best results.

Try to discover the preferred mode of communication for each team member. Some people are fine relying on emails; others like to have a phone conversation. And once we can finally return to working together in offices, you may determine that face-to-face updates may be most advantageous for some members.

4. Ask for Feedback

Showing your willingness to reach out for advice and guidance will make a positive impression on your boss. When you make it clear that you welcome and can accept pointers, you display candor and trust in what opinions your superior has to offer. Your proclivity towards considering ways of improving your performance and strengthening any working interactions will signal your strong relationship skills.

If you are in a work environment where you are asked to give feedback, be generous and compassionate. That does not mean being wishy-washy. Try always to give the type of feedback that you wouldn’t mind receiving.

5. Give Credit Where It’s Due

Be the worker who remembers to credit staffers with their contributions. It’s a surprisingly rare talent to credit others, but when you do so, they will remember to credit you, and the collective credit your team will accrue will be well worth the effort.

Advertising

How Does Relationship Building Build Careers?

Once you have strengthened and deepened your relationships, here are some of the great benefits:

Work Doesn’t Feel So Much Like Work

According to a Gallup poll, when you have a best friend at work, you are more likely to feel engaged with your job. Work is more fun when you have positive, productive relationships with your colleagues. Instead of spending time and energy overcoming difficult personalities, you can spend time enjoying the camaraderie with colleagues as you work congenially on projects together. When your coworkers are your friends, time goes by quickly and challenges don’t weigh as heavily.

You Can Find Good Help

It’s easier to ask for assistance when you have a good working relationship with a colleague. And with office tasks changing at the speed of technology, chances are that you are going to need some help acclimating—especially now that work has gone remote due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

Much of relationship building rests on your genuine expressions of appreciation toward others. Showing gratitude for another’s help or for their willingness to put in the extra effort will let them know you value them.

Mentors Come Out of the Woodwork

Mentors are proven to advance your professional and career development. A mentor can help you navigate how to approach your work and keep you apprised of industry trends. They have a plethora of experience to draw from that can be invaluable when advising you on achieving career success and advancement.

Mentors flock to those who are skilled at relationship building. So, work on your relationships and keep your eyes peeled for a worthy mentor.

Advertising

You Pull Together as a Team

Great teamwork starts with having an “abundance mentality” rather than a scarcity mentality. Too often, workers view all projects through a scarcity mentality lens. This leads to office strife as coworkers compete for their piece of the pie. But in an abundance mentality mode, you focus on the strengths that others bring rather than the possibility that they are potential competitors.

Instead, you can commit relationship building efforts to ensure a positive work environment rather than an adversarial one. When you let others know that you intend to support their efforts and contribute to their success, they will respond in kind. Go, team!

Your Network Expands and So Does Your Paycheck

Expand your relationship building scope beyond your coworkers to include customers, suppliers, and other industry stakeholders. Your extra efforts can lead to extra sales, a more rewarding career, and even speedy professional advancement. And don’t overlook the importance of building warm relationships with assistants, receptionists, or even interns.

Take care to build bridges, not just to your boss and your boss’s boss but with those that work under you as well. You may find that someone who you wouldn’t expect will put in a good word for you with your supervisor.

Building and maintaining good working relationships with everyone you come in contact with can pay off in unforeseen ways. You never know when that underling will turn out to be the company’s “golden child.” Six years from now you may be turning to them for a job. If you have built up a good, trusting work relationship with others along your way, you will more likely be considered for positions that any of these people may be looking to fill.

Your Job Won’t Stress You Out

Study shows that some 83 percent of American workers experience work-related stress.[1] Granted, some of that stress is now likely caused by the new pandemic-triggered workplace adjustments, yet bosses and management, in general, are reportedly the predominant source of stress for more than one-third of workers.

Advertising

Having meaningful connections among coworkers is the best way to make work less stressful. Whether it is having others whom to commiserate with, bounce ideas off, or bring out your best performance, friendships strengthen the group’s esprit de corps and lower the stress level of your job.

Your Career Shines Bright

Who would you feel better about approaching to provide a recommendation or ask for promotion: a cold, aloof boss with whom you have only an impersonal relationship or one that knows you as a person and with whom you have built a warm, trusting relationship?

Your career advancement will always excel when you have a mutual bond of friendship and appreciation with those who can recommend you. Consider the plug you could receive from a supervisor who knows you as a friend versus one who remains detached and only notices you in terms of your ability to meet deadlines or attain goals.

When people fully know your skills, strengths, personality, and aspirations, you have promoters who will sing your praises with any opportunity for advancement.

Final Thoughts

At the end of the day, it is “who you know” not “what you know.” When you build relationships, you build a pipeline of colleagues, work partners, team members, current bosses, and former bosses who want to help you—who want to see you succeed.

At its core, every business is a people business. Making a point to take the small but meaningful actions that build the foundation of a good relationship can be instrumental in cultivating better relationships at work.

More Articles About Relationships Building

Featured photo credit: Adam Winger via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] The American Institute of Stress: 42 Worrying Workplace Stress Statistics

Read Next