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Remember These 9 Things When Life Gets Rough

Remember These 9 Things When Life Gets Rough

John Lennon once famously said “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans” in his song “Beautiful Boy” And indeed, a lot of times, life doesn’t exactly turn the way we foresee it to. It seems like everything is going fine, and all of a sudden the panic button strikes. You find everything tumbling around you. Life and the idea of it being a beautiful journey, don’t click together. For many of us, life becomes a daunting task and with every breath, it appears we’re trying to evade the never-ending sequence of melancholies.

But is life really all about dealing with every new problem flung upon us? Can’t we escape the pain and suffering, popping in front of us, in different forms? The answer is no. You may have to face hurdles frequently in life. But it’s totally upon you to let those hurdles make your life rough or go on living life as a beautiful journey. How? Well, you have to remember the following nine things when life gets rough.

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1. If you believe and work for it, everything is possible.

You may think of it as a cliché, but if you keep the faith and work hard for your cause, you are destined to achieve. Your dreams may be pretty big and you may feel you’ll never make it. But what’s the point in always whining and fearing things won’t go well, before you’ve even started? If you work hard, you’ll surely move ahead. If things don’t seem to go well, remember what Christopher Reeve told us: “Once you choose hope, anything is possible”.

2. Life is very short.

Stevie Wonder said “Time is long and life is short”. This is exactly how life is. It is very short for us to achieve all the things we’d ever wanted to. Remembering this thing will help us in many ways in our life. Since life is short, you don’t have to achieve each and everything you look around. You may not be able to achieve a certain few things and that’s fine, you were not supposed to do everything. And, there’s no point in worrying too much about this short life, feeling miserable even when the slightest of problems appear. Constantly worrying about and over-analyzing things in this short life won’t help you much.

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3. Failures are the pillar of success.

Keep this thing in mind that Michael Jordan said: “I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” You don’t have to succeed in whatever you pursue all at once. More often than not, you’re bound to fail in your first attempt. Don’t be heartbroken and quit. Although you didn’t succeed, you certainly learned a thing or few in the attempts you made towards getting the job done. So work hard and with more determination next time. You’ll surely get to the finish line.

4. When one door closes, another opens.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” This is what Alexander Graham Bell said, and it portrays how most of us think when something has gone wrong. Remembering this thing will certainly help most of us if things aren’t working well. We’ll never achieve all the things we wanted in life and sometimes, something that has gone, is gone for once and forever. There’s no point in making own life miserable, remembering the same thing over and over. It’s better to have a keen look over what positives we can find in life and embrace the beauty of life with the newly opened door.

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5. There’s no short-cut to success.

One of the common things that makes our life rough is that we want to achieve so many things in a very limited time. But believe me, it won’t work out that way. You may have learned about or even read the books like “Learn to play guitar in a week” or “master Spanish in three days”. But, you may have already experienced it, such things will never work out. The fact that help us to attain some skills or provide some knowledge can’t be denied but what they sell you, claiming to make you an expert in such a limited time, just will not work out. Same is the thing with life. Your biggest dreams will take a long time to be fulfilled, sometimes even all your life. So forget about building Rome in a day.

6. Avoid constant comparison with others.

You may find your salary far less than others. Your friend always scores better grades than you. Your sister is more beautiful than you. We are always making such comparisons. Sometimes, we make the comparison with people at the top of the trade, like comparing our guitar skills with Eric Clapton. It’s one thing to be motivated by the success of others and set a mark for ourselves to reach. But always comparing with others and feeling worthless is not just good at all. What you need to remember is that everyone has got strengths and weaknesses, and you may not make it to the top or you’ll take a little more time. There’s lot of competition out there, so it’s better to take a realistic approach to life, improving gradually with every stride.

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7. Life is a journey, not a destination.

Ralph Waldo Emerson said “Life is a journey, not a destination.” And, it is a very important quote to remember if we want a happy and prosperous life for ourselves. A lot of times, we imagine ourselves at the end of the road, when we have achieved everything. But when we are trying to walk along the path, we don’t have much motivation for it. We are constantly thinking about the glory and the prize. But what you should remember is that honors are just what others offered to you, experience is what you really garnered for yourself. This way, we’ll enjoy life at every step and even the most arduous tasks seem easier to complete.

8. Don’t worry about what others think.

It’s a common problem for most of us that we are always conscious of what others think of us. This is a big hurdle for us, preventing us from fulfilling our dreams and enjoying the life. We want to do a new thing, but the thoughts occurs to us “What if I am not successful?”, “How shall others react when they know about it?” and “Will it really make them happy?” You don’t have to live your life pleasing others all the while. What others think about you just doesn’t matter. If you’re always held back by such things, you’ll never be able to get through a task and fulfill your dreams.

9. Nothing lasts forever.

Life is full of ups and downs. It doesn’t always work out how you had planned. What to do when such cases arise? Remember “Nothing lasts forever.” Not even your worries and troubles. This may not exactly help you solve the problem, but it will most certainly help you move along in the darkest of times. If you just can’t get things happen how hard you try, what’s the point worrying? And if, you can do something about it, why to worry after all?

Featured photo credit: Thumbs up for 4 day weekends via flickr via flickr.com

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Nabin Paudyal

Co-Founder, Siplikan Media Group

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The Gentle Art of Saying No

The Gentle Art of Saying No

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

  1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
  2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
  3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
  4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
  5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
  6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
  7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
  8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
  9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
  10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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