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7 Ways To Make Dating Less Stressful And Find A Happy Relationship

7 Ways To Make Dating Less Stressful And Find A Happy Relationship

Dating can be stressful. Whether you’re meeting someone for the first time or spending time trying to find the person of your dreams, it can be overwhelming and can result in a less than stellar experience. When dating becomes difficult, it is easy to settle to get out of the dating meat market. Don’t fall into the trap! Here are seven ways to make dating less stressful and find a happy relationship.

Meet more people.

Be open to meeting people every day. You don’t have to be a serial dater to meet people. Rather find people at work, at the gym, the grocery. Why is this important? We put too much pressure on making dates perfect in part because we don’t want to lose the opportunity. Get rid of the scarcity mindset regarding meeting the right person! Lower expectations and just have fun. When you’re meeting people everyday, you’ll know there are plenty of options and be less likely to settle.

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Meet the right people.

There’s plenty of fish in the sea. Sound advice, perhaps, but it happens to miss the point. You aren’t looking for more, more the right. There’s really two ways to help ensure you find the right person. The first, and most obvious, is to meet people who have similar interests, who share friends with you, and who you have a great chance of being compatible with. This challenging task has become slightly easier with the popularization of online dating, allowing to get to know someone without all the pressure. The other, less thought about reason to meet the right people? Lose the wrong ones quickly. Understand what you’re looking for and don’t settle for less.

Shrug off rejection.

Rejection hurts. But how much it hurts depends on you! Don’t dwell on bad experiences. Learn from them. Keep your expectations in check and understand most dates aren’t going to turn into a relationship. Rejection doesn’t mean you are not good enough. When you have the right mindset, you’ll be less stressed, be able to shrug off rejections, and find a happy relationship that actually works.

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Find yourself first.

Start with yourself first. Know what you’re looking for, what you enjoy, and how you want to be treated. Too many people spend most of the dating process trying to impress someone into liking them. Don’t fall into that trap. Be yourself, do what you like, and see where the chips fall. You don’t need someone else to complete you. Understand this and make sure he or she complements you rather than complete you.

Keep it simple.

Dating can seem overwhelming. Keep it simple. Start slow. Grabbing a cup of coffee or meeting at an event you’re both attending can be an easy way to test the waters. Don’t buy into the hype of dating games. Be open. Be honest. And move at the speed you’re comfortable going. You’ll find the process can be much less stressful when you keep it simple.

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Be yourself.

Trying to keep up an image that’s not natural can be terribly stressful, plus makes for a forced relationship even if it does work. Being true to yourself will make dating less stressful and more fun. You’ll also find you have a better chance for a happy relationship once you get past the honeymoon stage. It’s easy to overlook flaws in the beginning, but if you stay true to yourself, you’ll have a successful, happy relationship.

Make dates fun.

Dating should be fun! Don’t take it so seriously. Don’t focus solely on the romance. Focus on finding something you both love doing and have fun. If you both love nature, take a walk in the local park. If you’re sports nuts, check out a local sporting event. Find dates that let you be yourself, and most importantly, get to know your date. Don’t fall into the trap of doing a movie and dinner, think outside the box and have some fun. You’ll have a much less stressful and fun experience.

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Featured photo credit: Cekna via flickr.com

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Kyle Robbins

Founder, BrandingBeard.com

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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