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Effectively Stop Complaining in 7 Easy Steps

Effectively Stop Complaining in 7 Easy Steps

Life is stressful, and complaining may be considered by many as an extension of being absolutely normal. However, complaining affects our brains and our physical health negatively. A sense of sadness or melancholy is increased, along with real dissatisfaction with our daily lives.

Negative stress can also exacerbate chronic health problems, such as diabetes or asthma. Other physical complaints may include increased headaches, joint pain, and depression. One way to combat these symptoms is through learning how to stop useless complaining.

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    1. Nourish A Positive Attitude

    Change the way you think. Of course, this is far easier said than done, but it is quite possible. Cultivate a positive spin on how you perceive the problem. For example, it is easy to stress over having the perfect child, job, or date. Accept that life is just plain messy. No one and no situation is or can be ‘perfect.’ Accept the situation for what it is and move forward. Keep the pro side heavily weighed against the negatives. When you inevitably experience set-backs, move forward and remember that everyone has them.

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    2. Learn To Adapt

    The only sure thing about life is that nothing stays the same. Change is coming whether it’s tomorrow, next month, or next year. Some life changes are significantly sad. Allow a period of grieving. Sometimes, setting a daily time to be sad about the change can help. Acceptance of a situation helps you to adapt positively to life’s changes. Take up the challenge of seeing the positive in a situation, even if it is a small good. Think of the experience as an opportunity rather than an untenable obstacle.

    3. Be More Mindful

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      The past can never be changed and worry about the future is futile; complaining about either is a pointless exercise. Rather, move in the present time and cope only with the present situation as it unfolds. Recognize negative thoughts and replace them with a positive spin. Rather than, “Oh, not the alarm again” think of all that can be accomplished in a bright, new day. While it may sound cliché, learn to graciously accept all that life has to offer–the good and the bad. Even bad circumstances will change, and can teach you more mindful attitudes, such as patience.

      4. Be Assertive

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      1-confidence

        Giving up the bad habit of complaining does not mean allowing yourself to become someone else’s doormat. Assertiveness is the way to tell others what your needs are and how these can be met. Convey confidence through something as simple as posture. Stand up straight, have a firm handshake, and always look people in the eye. Enunciate and speak clearly, you want people to understand your point. Avoid rambling, which may lead to awkward and unproductive pauses. Be firm and express what you want clearly. Don’t leave your meaning to guess work.

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          5. Be Less Judgmental

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            This includes yourself. Everyone makes mistakes and being critical leads to complaining. Should of, would of, and could of are phrases that’s better left out of your vocabulary. Let go of control. It is simply impossible to be in control of every situation, sometimes it is best to lower the stress and simply roll with the consequences. List your strengths to build confidence and, on a better day, list your weaknesses and how to downplay them. Compliment yourself and others. Acknowledge a job well done, or a nicely fitting suit or dress.

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            6. Be Responsible

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              Own your mistakes, but never the mistakes of others. The first step to being responsible is self-respect. Begin by thinking highly of yourself and your decision-making process. There is no reason not to. Keep people in your life who respect you, and fail miserably at taking advantage of you. Eject chronic complainers. Let them carry their complaints elsewhere. Through garnering people in your life that like and respect you, you will naturally reciprocate the respect.

              7. Keep Moving Forward

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                Absolutely refuse to allow life’s obstacles to keep you from moving onward. Sure, there are people and situations that will annoy you. This is no excuse to dwell on the negativity. Remember, “this too shall pass.” The thing that is creating a problem cannot last forever. Most problems are temporary and fleeting. Understanding this is the key to moving forward. Take note of self-doubt and then release these thoughts. Spending time in self-doubt is ultimately a waste. Make your decision and follow through.

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                  As you follow these steps and lessen the habit of complaining, you will find yourself leading a more confident lifestyle. Stop complaining about things beyond your control. Move forward with self-assurance and confidence. Above everything else, be gentle with yourself.

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                  Last Updated on July 10, 2020

                  How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

                  How to Reinvent Yourself and Change Your Life

                  There will always be times in your life when you may need to learn how to reinvent yourself. This could come when you experience a big change, such as leaving your job, moving on from a relationship, transferring to a new home, or losing a loved one. If you are going through a major shift in your life, you may have to find new ways of thinking or doing things, or risk failing to reach your full potential.

                  “When something bad happens, you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.”

                  Many people who dared to leave their old unhappy lives enabled themselves to pursue their passions and find a renewed zest for living. You can also achieve the same if you take a leap of faith and make things happen for yourself.

                  To help you always be at your best wherever you may be in your life, here are some practical tips on how to reinvent yourself.

                  The Reinvention Checklist

                  Before embarking on a journey of self-reinvention, you need to make sure that you have everything that you need to make the trip bump-proof. These things include:

                  Resilience

                  Problems and obstacles are guaranteed to happen. Some of them will be difficult and may knock you off course; the important thing, however, is that you learn from these difficulties, never lose focus, and always get back up. This requires building resilience to get through the tough times.

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                  Support

                  Humans are social beings. Although it is important that you learn to rely on yourself when facing any challenge, it is also important to have a support team that you can lean on to give you a boost when things get too tough and to correct you when you’re making mistakes.

                  The key is to find the right balance between independence and dependence. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and share the difficulties you’re facing. When you open up, you’ll find the people who are really going to be there for you.

                  Self-Care

                  During the process of learning how to reinvent yourself, you will have to pull yourself away from your old comfort zones, habits, roles, and self-perceptions. This can be difficult and cause you to question your self-worth, so it’s important to engage in self-care to maintain a positive outlook and keep your mind and body healthy as you face the challenges that await you. Self-care can include:

                  • Participating in a hobby you enjoy
                  • Spending time with your support system
                  • Taking some time to walk in nature
                  • Practicing loving-kindness meditation

                  Find what works for you and what helps you feel like your true self as you seek a reinvented version of you.

                  How to Reinvent Yourself

                  Once you’re sure that you’re equipped with all the tools in the self-reinvention checklist, you can begin your journey of learning how to reinvent yourself.

                  1. Discover Your Strengths

                  This step provides valuable information on how you deal with certain situations. If you have this information, you will be able to manage difficulties more efficiently.

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                  To find out what your strengths are, you can ask your friends and colleagues for feedback, engage in self-reflection, or try these 10 Ways to Find Your Own Personal Strengths.

                  2. Plan

                  This step calls for a thorough assessment of your current emotional, psychological, and financial status so that you can develop plans that are realistic and practical.

                  It’s okay to have ambitious dreams, but your plans have to be realistic. Making use of SMART goals can help you plan your life better.

                  You can also consult your mentor or life coach for practical tips and advice.

                  Ultimately, you’ll want to create specific long-term and short-term goals that you can create milestones for. By doing this, you’ll lay out a specific roadmap to your reinvented self.

                  3. Try Things Out

                  Sometimes, we don’t know if solutions actually work until we try them out. This is why it is important to experiment whenever possible, especially if you’re dealing with a career change. You may need to simply experiment in order to find the things you like. This can be the same with hobbies. If you’re not sure what you would like doing, accept invitations from friends to join them in their favorite sport or take a class, like pottery or photography.

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                  By seeing what’s out there in any area of your life, you’ll have a better chance of finding the things you enjoy and the goals you want to create.

                  4. Manage Your Finances Well

                  Changes may require a bit of money. If you’re shifting to a new career, you may have to pay for training. If you’re going through a tough divorce or having a hard time dealing with the death of a loved one, you may have to pay for therapy. If you’re moving to a new home, you’ll definitely have to pay a whole lot of expenses.

                  All of these things are possible, but it will require a bit of money savviness as you learn how to reinvent yourself. If you have that cushion, you’ll feel more comfortable straying from your current path to try new things.

                  5. Muster Your Courage

                  Fears and self-doubt may arise when you encounter difficulties and setbacks. Sometimes, they may also come when you’re taking risks. You have to manage these negative emotions well and not allow them to discourage you. Tap into your courage and try doing at least one new thing each week to develop it.

                  Learn how to deal with your self-doubts to move forward in this article: How Self Doubt Keeps You Stuck (And How to Overcome It)

                  6. Use Your Support Group

                  As stated above, you need to build a strong support group before you even start the process of reinventing yourself. Your group will keep you from taking wrong turns and encourage you when you get too weighed down by problems. Don’t be afraid to call them, or even ask them out for coffee if you need to vent about the current difficulties you’re facing.

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                  7. Remind Yourself Every Day of Your Commitment

                  Write your goals on different-sized cards and scatter them at home and at work in places where you can easily see them. This way, you will constantly be reminded of where you want to be. Remember, writing down your goals helps them stick[1].

                  8. Accept Failure, Learn, and Resume Your Journey

                  Failing is normal, especially when we’re trying out something new. When you fail, simply recognize it, learn from it, and move on. Failure, in the end, is the best way to learn what does and doesn’t work, and you simply won’t be able to learn how to reinvent yourself if you don’t accept the inevitable failures that await you.

                  Final Thoughts

                  If you truly want to learn how to reinvent yourself and live the life you desire, take the advice above and start taking action. It will take time, patience, and plenty of effort to make the change you want happen, but it will be all worth it.

                  More Tips on How to Reinvent Yourself

                  Featured photo credit: Ashley Rich via unsplash.com

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