Advertising
Advertising

30 Tips To Become More Confident Nobody Told You Before

30 Tips To Become More Confident Nobody Told You Before

Confidence is belief. It is the ability to rely on something or someone. Self-confidence is your ability to rely on yourself – to rest in the assurance that when it comes right down to it, win or lose, you can count on you. You just need to be more confident than the other person.

If you lack self-confidence, it may feel like a lost cause. But confidence is not an intrinsic quality. Confidence can be learned. Read on to see how.

Advertising

30 confidence-building habits you can incorporate into your daily life to allow you to become more confident:

  1. Be clear. Unless you’re The Riddler, it’s time to put away babbling. Be clear. Be direct. Speak without ambiguity.
  2. Speak more slowly. People who talk fast often lack confidence in what they are saying and are usually saying too much.
  3. Make eye contact. In Western culture, the easiest way to truly connect with someone is to give them the respect of looking them in the eyes.
  4. Say hello. Make it a habit to offer a greeting when you pass people on the street, especially if your eyes meet for a moment as you walk by.
  5. Stand up straight. A study by Richard Petty, of Ohio State University, and Pablo Brinol, of the Universidad Automonma de Madrid, found people who sat up straight had more positive thoughts about their own abilities.
  6. Take up more space. Executive coach and author Olivia Fox Cabane talks about the importance of power poses in her book, The Charisma Myth. Power poses take up more space and make you feel more dominant.
  7. Walk in the center of the sidewalk. Conduct a social experiment where you test out your confidence. Focus on exuding dominance. Walk in the center of the sidewalk. Do not veer when another person heads in your direction. See if you can get that person to move off the sidewalk just by the way you carry yourself.
  8. Smile more. Smiling makes you feel good and it puts the people around you at ease.
  9. Giggle less. Laughing at inappropriate times is a sign of insecurity. Now that you are aware, you can slowly begin to break the habit.
  10. Do what you’re good at. Find your strengths and focus your attention on building your strengths, rather than hiding or building your weaknesses.
  11. Listen to compliments. When someone compliments you, graciously accept it. If you find multiple people compliment you on the same thing, internalize it. It may be true.
  12. Exercise. Regular exercise improves your self-confidence, self-awareness and overall health.
  13. Do something that scares you. It was Eleanor Roosevelt who said, “Every day do something that scares you.” The more fears you conquer, the fewer fears you will have, and the more confident you will become.
  14. Do the worst thing on the list first. As a matter of habit, prioritize every task by doing the most important things on your To Do list first.
  15. Start and finish something challenging. It’s difficult to start something new and it takes effort to see it through. Start and finish something that challenges you. Conquering challenges always boosts confidence.
  16. Create goals that are difficult to reach. We are happiest when we set and strive to attain goals that require some effort on our part. Goal-setting is a great confidence-building habit.
  17. Stop hiding. Be transparent. Show people who you really are and be proud.
  18. Display your hidden talents. Put on display the talents you have that may be judged most harshly or that make you feel insecure. Get it out in the open.
  19. Write things down. Organize your thoughts and time by writing down important information.
  20. Use “I am.” Quite possibly the two most powerful words in the English language, “I am” are your life-sculpting words and it takes courage to say out loud what is really in your heart.
  21. Speak well of yourself. If you say something often enough, you will begin to believe it. Your words are containers for power. The most important opinion in the world is the one you have of yourself.
  22. Get good at something. Master something you always wanted to learn. Get really good at it and do it often.
  23. Learn to tell one great joke really, really well. We can’t all be Jimmy Fallon, but we can all get good at telling one joke. Get the words, the voices and the timing down until it’s flawless. Then take the opportunity to entertain people with that joke once in a while.
  24. Become an active listener. We live in a culture where the ability to multi-task is a desirable trait, but you can’t listen and do something else. It’s one or the other. Learn to listen to people. Give them your full, undivided attention. It will make you a much better conversationalist.
  25. Dress well. Image is important. When you look good, you feel good, and with both of those you become more confident.
  26. Put away the measuring stick. Break the habit of comparing yourself to other people. It is counter-productive.
  27. Celebrate little victories. Resist the temptation to say, “It was nothing.” Every victory counts. Every single one. Celebrate them.
  28. Believe in yourself. Make it a point that whenever you begin to doubt your ability, you stop the “stinkin’ thinkin’” and replace doubt with belief.
  29. Mind your own business. Focus on self-development and doing your best. That’s all you can do and it’s all anyone can require of you.
  30. Help out. There’s nothing like helping someone reach their goals. The late Jim Rohn used to say, “You can get what you want if you help enough other people get what they want.”

If you follow these 30 tips you will—yes you will!—become more confident!

Advertising

Featured photo credit: 7908265452 via Photopin

Advertising

Advertising

More by this author

10 Common Mistakes You Make When Setting Deadlines 30 Tips To Become More Confident Nobody Told You Before Peak Your Performance in 6 Easy Steps

Trending in Communication

1 What Is Your Destiny in Life? How to Mindfully Achieve Your Purpose 2 7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck 3 10 Things You Can Do Now to Change Your Life Forever 4 Meditation Can Change Your Life: The Power of Mindfulness 5 Understand Your Love Style & Learn to Love: Co Dependent Relationship

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on September 17, 2018

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship That Makes You Feel Stuck

Relationships are complicated and when you’re unhappy, it can be difficult to tell what’s causing it and what needs to change.

Sometimes it’s as easy as opening up to your partner about your problems, while other times it may be necessary to switch partners or roll solo to get your mind straight.

When you’re in the thick of things, it can be difficult to tell if you’re unhappy in your relationship or just unhappy in general (in which case, a relationship may be just the cure you need).

Here’re signs of an unhappy relationship that is possibly making you feel stuck:

1. You’re depressed about your home life.

No matter what you do in life, you’re going to have good and bad days. Your relationship is no different.

However, no matter what you’re going through at home, you have to feel comfortable in your own home.

If you constantly dread going home because your significant other is there, there’s a problem. Maybe it’s something you already know about, everyone has an argument or just needs some alone time.

Advertising

When that yearning to be alone becomes an insatiable obsession over the course of months and years, it’s time to realize you’re not the exception to the rule.

You’re unhappy in your relationship, and you need to take a look in the mirror and do whatever it takes to make yourself smile.

2. You aren’t comfortable being yourself.

Remember all those things you discovered about yourself when you first got together? The way your partner made you feel when you met that made you fall in love with him or her in the first place.

If they don’t make you feel that way anymore, it’s not the end of the world. If your partner makes you uncomfortable about being you, then her or she is only dragging you down. It’s up to you to decide how to handle that.

You need to be comfortable with who you are. This means being comfortable in your skin and with the way you walk, talk, look, breath, move, and all the other things that make you uniquely you.

If the person who supposedly loves you doesn’t make you feel good about yourself, know that you can do better. They’re not even one in a billion.

3. You can’t stop snooping.

Mutual trust is necessary in any relationship. The only way to get that trust is with respect.

Advertising

I can find you anywhere online, no matter how private and secure you think you are. The odds of you having a password I can’t crack are slim. If we’ve met in person, I could install a remote key logger on your device without even touching it.

Finding your information online hardly takes a clandestine organization. Any idiot with a Wi-Fi-enabled device can cyberstalk you. I’m just the only idiot in the village admitting it.

So now that we know everyone snoops, it’s time to address your personal habits. Governments snoop because they don’t trust us. If you’re snooping on your partner, it’s because you don’t trust them.

It’s ok to have doubts, and it’s perfectly normal to look into anything that looks weird, but keep in mind that data collection is only half of an investigation.

If you find yourself constantly snooping and questioning everything, clearly there’s a trust issue and the relationship likely needs to end.

4. You’re afraid of commitment.

If you’ve been dating longer than a year and you aren’t engaged, it’s never going to happen.

Commitment is important. People will come up with a million ways to describe why they can’t be committed.

Advertising

No matter who you are if you like it, you need to put a ring on it. Find an engagement ring, stick a gemstone in it and marry the person. If you’re not legally able to get married or you don’t believe in it for one reason or another, have a child (or adopt one, however you’re able to) or treat your partner’s family like your own. It’s a huge financial and mental commitment.

If you’re not ready for one or the other after some time, don’t waste anymore of your precious life on the relationship.

Your relationship should be something that propels you forward. If it’s not going anywhere, make it an open relationship and call it what it is—dating multiple people.

5. You imagine a happier life without your partner.

If all you’re doing is imagining a happier life without your partner, it’s a sign that you’re in the wrong relationship. You’re unhappy and you need to get out.

Your partner should be included in your dreams. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a future with someone.

Try to remember what you dreamed of before you got your heart broken by the realities of life, love and the pursuit of human success.

Remember when you would crush on that cute kid in class? You would secretly imagine marrying him or her and going on an adventure—that’s the way life should be.

Advertising

If you’re not at least imagining adventures together, then why are you in that relationship?

6. You resent, rather than love your partner.

When a relationship starts to crumble, you begin to resent your partner for all the things you once loved about him or her.

When you’ve reached this point, your partner has reached at least No. 2 on this list. From your partner’s perspective, your unhappiness with them is picked up as bashing them for being who they are.

If you’re both unhappy in the relationship, it’s better if it ends as quickly and painlessly as possible.

7. You chase past feelings.

It’s okay to reminisce about the past, but if all you do is wish things were like they used to be, it’s a sign you’re not on the right path.

You’re unhappy and, at the very least, you need to have an open dialogue about it. This isn’t necessarily a sign that the relationship should end, but it definitely needs a spark.

When you talk to your partner candidly about what it is you’re looking for, you never know how they’ll react. The risk alone is worth it, good or bad.

Final thoughts

If you’re feeling stuck in your current relationship, it’s time to reflect about it with your partner. Don’t ignore these signs of an unhappy relationship as they will slowly go worse and harm both you and your partner in long-term.

Featured photo credit: josh peterson via unsplash.com

Read Next