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20 Reasons Why You Should Date Solo Women Travelers

20 Reasons Why You Should Date Solo Women Travelers

Women who travel alone have experienced the world in completely unique ways. They develop traits that shape them into strong women. Having said that, they have a lot of characteristics that help relationships grow and flourish. Below are reasons you should date women who travel alone.

1. They are independent

It’s seems like the most obvious one, but it’s true. Women who travel alone don’t depend on anyone to get their work done. They are used to depending on themselves and when they are in relationships it’s no different. They don’t depend solely on their partners and contribute equally which makes for a good relationship.

2. They are patient

Hours of waiting around, flight connections, and misplaced baggage makes them incredibly patient. They are used to facing chaotic situations and are able to maintain their composure. When they are in relationships, this patience allows them to be calmer in the face of any issues that arise.

3. They aren’t afraid of being alone

They enjoy quiet solitude from time to time because they are used to being in empty airports at the crack of dawn. When they are in relationships, they like having time to themselves and are fine with being alone. In relationships, they don’t mind having time apart from their partners, which makes for a healthy relationship.

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4. They are good problem solvers

Because they have been faced with countless issues whilst traveling alone, they have had to deal with them alone and have developed good problem solving skills. This helps them tackle day to day issues with ease. When in relationships, they are able to prevent any arguments from starting by solving problems before they start.

5. They look at the world differently

Because they have traveled alone, they have spent a lot of time reflecting and absorbing the beauty of the world. They are able to look passed small flaws and see the bigger picture. When in relationships, this allows them to be more accepting as they understand that flaws are part of being human.

6. They are appreciative

They are used to being by themselves and so they are used to doing things for themselves. They don’t expect anything of anyone. This makes them appreciate it when their partners do simple things for them. Appreciation makes for good relationships.

7. They are comfortable with change

Women who travel alone are constantly in changing environments. They are able to adapt to changes quickly. When they are in relationships, sudden changes in circumstance don’t upset them and they are able to adapt quickly. This avoids any tension and keeps the relationship healthy.

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8. They are confident

As they travel by themselves, they have learnt to be confident. Confidence allows them to love themselves and thus love people around them. This makes for stable, healthy relationships.

9. They know themselves well

Traveling alone has given them time to grow and learn things about themselves. Women who travel alone are fully aware of who they are and what they want. Because they know themselves, they are able to be settled when they are in relationships and form healthy bonds.

10. They are open-minded

They have seen different parts of the world and thus have been exposed to different cultures. This makes them open to different ideas. This helps in relationships as they are able to understand their partners point of view better.

11. They can protect themselves

They have had to take care of themselves because of all the solo travel and therefore are fully capable of protecting themselves. This gives them strength within themselves. When they are in relationships, this helps them feel independent, which makes for happier relationships.

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12. They can manage their money well

Traveling alone forces you to organize your money well. Women who travel alone develop this skill. Therefore in relationships they experience less tension when it comes to money.

13. They are good planners

Women who travel alone have learnt to manage their time well and plan ahead. This enables them to be good planners, which helps ease any tension that arises in relationships.

14. They are good decision makers

They have had to make decisions under pressure before and therefore they know how to successfully make good decisions. They don’t face any trouble that comes from bad decision making. This allows them to form healthy relationships with fewer arguments.

15. They see the beauty in others

They have been around so many people and have learnt to see how everyone has beauty within themselves. They see the best in people. When they are in relationships, they look for the best in their partner and focus on that making for healthier relationships.

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16. They are willing to try new things

They are open to try different things because they are more cultured due to their solo travel. They see the importance in experiencing new things. This helps keep relationships fresh and therefore healthy.

17. They are up for challenges

When things get difficult, they don’t back down. This is a skill they learnt while they travel alone as they have had to face many challenging situations that they have overcome. When they face obstacles in relationships they work at it instead of walking away.

18. They have incredible stories

Because they have experienced a lot of the world alone, they have many interesting stories to share. Therefore relationships with women who travel alone are never boring because of all their experiences they have to share.

19. They place value on things that are important

They have seen so much of the world alone and have had time to see what is really important in life. Therefore they don’t value material possessions as much as they value experiences and emotions. This helps them form healthier stronger bonds with people.

20. They have learned to love themselves

Because they have had time to reflect on themselves and learn who they are due to all the solo travel, they are truly connected with themselves. They develop a love for who they are and this allows them to love other people deeply.

Featured photo credit: Girl Pointing At Sky In Summer via stokpic.com

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Last Updated on March 30, 2020

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

What Does Self-Conscious Mean? (And How to Stop Being It)

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like your nerves simply couldn’t handle it? Your heart beats fast, you start to sweat, and you feel like all eyes are on you (even if they’re really not). This is just one of the many ways that being self-conscious can rear its ugly head.

You may not even realize you’re self-conscious, and you may be wondering, “What does self-conscious mean?” That’s a good place to start.

This article will define self-consciousness, show how practically everyone has faced it at one point or another, and give you tips to avoid it.

What Does Self-Conscious Mean?

According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, self-conscious is defined as “conscious of one’s own acts or states as belonging to or originating in oneself.”[1]

Not so bad, right? There’s another definition, though — one that speaks more to what you’re going through: “feeling uncomfortably conscious of oneself as an object of the observation of others.” For those of us who regularly deal with extreme self-consciousness, that second definition sounds about right.

There are many different ways self-consciousness can spring up. You may feel self-conscious around people you know, like your family members or closest friends. You may feel self-conscious at work, even though you spend hours every week around your co-workers. Or you may feel self-conscious when out in public and surrounded by strangers. However, you probably don’t feel self-conscious when you’re home alone.

How to Stop Being Too Self-Conscious

When you’re in the throes of self-consciousness, it’s nearly impossible to remember how to stop feeling that way. That’s why it’s so important to prepare ahead of time, when you’re feeling ready to tackle the problem instead of succumbing to it.

Here are a variety of ways to feel better about yourself and stop thinking about how others see you.

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1. Ask Yourself, “So What?”

One way to banish negative, self-conscious thoughts is to do just that: banish them.

The next time you walk into a room and feel your face getting red, think to yourself, “So what?” How much does it really matter if people don’t like how you look or act? What’s the worst that could happen?

Most of the time, you’ll find that you don’t have a good answer to this question. Then, you can immediately start assigning such thoughts less importance. With self-awareness, you can acknowledge that your negative thoughts are present and realize that you don’t agree with them.[2] They’re just thoughts, after all.

2. Be Honest

A lie that self-consciousness might tell is that there’s one way to act or feel. Honestly, though, everyone else is just figuring life out as well. There isn’t a preferred way to show up to an event, gathering, or public place. What you can do is be honest with your feelings and thoughts.[3]

If you feel offended by something someone says, you don’t have to smile to be polite or laugh to fit in with the crowd. Instead, you can politely say why you disagree or excuse yourself and find a group of people who you relate to better. If you’re nervous, don’t overcompensate by trying to look relaxed and casual — it’ll be obvious you’re putting on a front. Instead, nothing is more endearing than saying, “I’m a little nervous!” to a room of people who probably feel the exact same way.

On the same note, if you don’t understand why someone wants you to do something, question it. You can do this at work, at home, or even with people you don’t know well. Nobody should force you to do something you don’t want to do.

Also, even if you’re willing to do what’s asked of you, there’s nothing wrong with asking for more clarification. People will realize that you’re not a person to be bossed around.

3. Understand Why You’re Struggling at Work

Being self-conscious at work can get in the way of your daily responsibilities, your relationships with co-workers, and even your career as a whole. If you’re facing some sort of conflict but you’re too nervous to speak up, you may be at the whim of what happens to you instead of taking some control.

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If you’re usually confident at work, you may be wondering where this new self-consciousness is coming from. It’s possible that you’re dealing with burnout.[4] Common signs are anxiety, fatigue and distraction, all of which can leave you feeling under-confident.

4. Succeed at Something

When you create success in your life, it’s easier to feel confident[5] and less self-conscious. If you feel self-conscious at work, finish the project that’s been looming over your head. If you feel self-conscious in the gym, complete an advanced workout class.

Exposing yourself to what you’re scared of and then succeeding at it in some way (even just by finishing it) can do wonders for your self-esteem. The more confidence you build, the more likely you are to have more success in the future, which will create a cycle of confidence-building.

5. Treat All of You — Not Just Your Self-Consciousness

Trying to solve your self-consciousness alone may not treat the root of the problem. Instead, take a well-rounded approach to lower your self-consciousness and build confidence in areas where you may struggle.

Even professional counselors are embracing this holistic type of treatment[6] because they feel that the health of the mind and body are inextricably linked. This approach combines physical, spiritual, and psychological components. Common activities and treatments include meditation, yoga, massage, and healthy changes to diet and exercise.

If much of this is new to you, it will pay to give it a try. You never know how it will impact you.

If you’re feeling self-conscious about how your body looks, a massage that makes you feel great could boost your confidence. If you try a new workout, you could have something exciting to talk about the next time you’re in a group setting.

Putting yourself in a new situation and learning that you can get through it with grace can give you the confidence to get through all sorts of events and nerve-wracking moments.

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6. Make the Changes That Are Within Your Control

Let’s say you walk into a room and you’re self-conscious about how you look. However, you may have put a lot of time and effort into your outfit. Even though it may stand out, this is how you have chosen to express yourself.

You have to work on your internal confidence, not your external appearance. There’s nothing to change other than your outlook.

On the other hand, maybe there’s something that you don’t like about yourself that you can change. For example, maybe you hate how a birthmark on your face looks or have varicose veins that you think are unsightly. If you can do something about these things, do it! There’s nothing wrong with changing your appearance (or skills, education, etc.) if it’s going to make you more confident.

You don’t have to accept your current situation for acceptance’s sake. There’s no award for putting up with something you hate. Confidence is also required to make changes that are scary, even if they’re for the better. Plus, it may be an easier fix than you thought. For example, treating varicose veins doesn’t have to involve surgery — sometimes simple compression stockings will take care of the problem.[7]

7. Realize That Everyone Has Awkward Moments

Everyone has said something awkward to someone else and lived to tell the tale. We’ve all forgotten somebody’s name or said, “You too!” when the concession stand girl says to enjoy our movie. Not only are these things uber-common, but they’re not nearly as embarrassing as you feel they are.

Think about how you react when someone else does something awkward. Do you think, “Wow, that person’s such a loser!” or do you think, “What a relief, I’m not the only one who does that.” Chances are good that’s the same reaction others have to you when you stumble.

Remember, self-consciousness is a state of mind that you have control over. You don’t have to feel this way. Do what you need to in order to build your confidence, put your self-consciousness in perspective, and start exercising your “I feel awesome about myself” muscle. It’ll get easier with time.

When Is Being Self-Conscious a Good Thing?

Self-consciousness can sometimes be a good thing[8], but you have to take the awkwardness and nerves out of it.

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In this case, “self-aware” is a much better term. Knowing how you come off to people is an excellent trait; you’ll be able to read a room and understand how what you do and say affects others. These are fantastic skills for people work and personal relationships.

Self-awareness helps you dress appropriately for the occasion, tells you that you’re talking too loud or not loud enough, and guides a conversation so you don’t offend or bore anyone.

It’s not about being someone you’re not — that can actually have adverse effects, just like self-consciousness. Instead, it’s about turning up certain aspects of yourself to perform well in the situation.

Final Thoughts

When you’re self-conscious, you’re constantly battling with yourself in an effort to control how other people view you. You try to change yourself to suit what you think other people want to see.

The truth, though, is that you can’t actually control how other people view you — and you may not even be correct about how they view you in the first place.

Being confident doesn’t happen overnight. Instead, it happens in small steps as you slowly build your confidence and say “no” to your self-consciousness. It also requires accepting that you’re going to feel self-conscious sometimes, and that’s okay.

Sometimes worrying that there is a problem can be more stressful than the problem itself. Feeling bad for feeling self-conscious can be more troublesome than simply feeling it and getting on with the day.

Forgive yourself for being human and make the small changes that will lead to better confidence in the future.

More Tips for Improving Your Self-Esteem

Featured photo credit: Cata via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] Merriam-Webster: Self-conscious
[2] Bustle: 7 Tips On How To Stop Feeling Self-Conscious
[3] Marc and Angel: 10 Things to Remember When You Feel Unsure of Yourself
[4] Bostitch: How to Protect Small Businesses From Burnout
[5] Psychology Today: Self-conscious? Get Over It
[6] Wake Forest University: Embracing Holistic Medicine
[7] Center for Vein Restoration: What Causes Venous Ulcers, and How Are They Treated?
[8] Scientific American: The Pros and Cons of Being Self-Aware

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