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20 Beliefs All Happy People Share

20 Beliefs All Happy People Share

Everybody wants to be happy; no matter what your age, background or location, the pursuit of happiness is a universal goal. Even with different definitions of what “happiness” is, there are core beliefs that all happy people seem to have. These are not always conscious thoughts; in many instances, it is their outlook on life and the highs and lows that are part of living that are the most profound beliefs. Here is a collection of twenty beliefs that can help guide you to find the happiness you are seeking – whatever that may be.

1. They believe that anything is possible

Happy people don’t make the mistake of putting limits on what they think can be accomplished. Putting up emotional barriers by stating “it can’t be done” is a sure fire way to limit the ability to act, imagine or dream. Believing that what is desired can be achieved enables a sense of purpose and, in turn, creates a positive mindset that can carry someone through challenging or difficult times. This is more than just positive thinking but an affirmation that they will not let their happiness be limited by the perception of others that there are limits to dreams.

2. They realize that happiness does not have a monetary value

It has become far too commonplace in today’s world to measure happiness in terms of the material acquisitions, the size of an investment portfolio, or dollar amount in the bank. Happy people have long realized that how little or how much one has is a purely transitory state; true wealth, like true happiness, is measured much differently. Studies of other cultures, such as those in Latin America, have shown that the level of happiness and positive outlook doesn’t have to correlate with material goods. Understanding that happiness doesn’t have (or need) a price tag is a major step toward becoming a happier person.

3. They don’t sweat the small stuff

Getting caught up in trivial arguments and issues can be a real blockage to happiness becoming part of daily life. Keeping the bigger picture in mind is an important tool in maintaining a perspective on keeping the focus on those things (and people) that truly matter. Allowing oneself to get hooked by superficial issues creates frustration and, ultimately, a sense of futility about life in general. Happy people understand that, in the end, most of life’s issues are the small stuff and that which matters most is what the heart and spirit are drawn to.

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4. They believe that, in life, there are no accidents

Accepting that there is a connection within the universe and that there is a reason for things that happen, is an important belief of happy people. Whether it is called fate, destiny, synchronicity or other similar terms, recognizing that each encounter, each interaction, that happens fulfills a purpose provides a sense of calm even in the middle of chaotic times. Trusting in their own process and abilities to follow the clues they are being given is part of transforming oneself from feeling like a victim of fate into an intrepid adventurer seeking the future. Life, then, becomes a joyous journey of discovery, rather than an emotional slog.

5. They accept ownership of the past without being bound by it

Happy people have learned that in order to have a true present, there has to be a willingness to acknowledge the past -good and bad- and to own it as part of the path that has lead to this point. Trying to reject or ignore the lessons learned by what has gone before can take too much time and attention from the important task of living in the now. The past cannot be undone; however the missteps and confusion of the past does not control the present, nor is it a predictor of the future. Acknowledging fully where one has been is a crucial part of understanding and appreciating where one is now and where the path of the tomorrow may lead.

6. They don’t allow negativity a place at the table

With the constant barrage of dire information a part of the 24/7/365 connected world, it can be a daunting task to try and remain positive. Yet this is precisely what happy people have committed themselves to doing. The external world is not something that can be controlled; the impact of the negative energy coming from it is something that can be managed. The choice is simple: Should these waves of external negativity be allowed to dictate one’s outlook in terms of personal goals, relationships, and dreams? Happy people answer this question with a resounding “NO!” Maintaining a positive individual outlook can be a kind of spiritual umbrella during the downpour of negative energy from the outside.

7. They embrace the power of “paying it forward”

Unforced giving can be a profound emotional and spiritual booster. Putting that kind of positive energy out into the universe adds a dimension to living in the present that enhances the outlook on tomorrow. Happy people understand that by paying it forward they are investing in a brighter future and, at the same time, making life in the present have more meaning-both  for the recipient of the act and the one who is doing the giving.

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8. They recognize and accept the reality that no one is perfect

When one expects another person to constantly meet a set of expectations, there is a great chance for disappointment and heartache. Human beings, by the very nature of being human, are not perfect and to expect otherwise is naïve and stressful. Happy people accept that perfection is not a part of the human make-up; that applies to themselves as well as those who they are involved with. Ironically, it is precisely this imperfection that makes relationships so compelling. Working together to find a harmonious middle is one of the happiest things two people can do.

9. They understand the importance of time

Time can be a thief, to be sure, and it can be far too easy to let it slip away. Happy people have learned that time is precious and not something to waste. Making the most of time is a largely overlooked part of achieving a happier life. The old phrase “time well spent” is not just an idle observation but an acknowledgement that time itself is a finite commodity for everyone and that making the most of the time one is granted can be one of the most satisfying and pleasurable activities that a person can pursue.

10 .They love without fear

To truly dare to love, without reservation, can seem to be almost a monumental task. The fear of rejection, concerns about a failure in the relationship, even doubts about deserving love, can all stand in the way of the happiness that being with someone should bring. Happy people accept the risk gladly. To experience the glorious victories and, yes, the glorious defeats, is all part of a spiritual reminder of how good it is to be alive and to be able to feel the warmth of the emotional connection with another person.

11. They avoid the clutches of the “green-eyed monster”

There are few emotions that are more destructive to happiness than jealousy. Being envious of another’s achievements ends up consuming time and energy that could (and should) be better spent on making one’s own dreams come true. Even more detrimental is allowing jealousy to cloud the reality of a situation, creating issues where none may exist. Happy people have learned that envy is emotional cancer that can eat away at the spirit and heart. Rejecting these feelings and resisting the negativity they contain can be a truly supportive step towards finding a happier reality.

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12. They accept themselves for who and what they are

It has often been said that the first step to true happiness is loving and acceptance of oneself. There are few things in life less satisfying than trying to be something other than what one is. Truly happy people have long accepted themselves for who they are and those elements within them that make each of them unique. From this starting point, working towards a better future, or making improvements, becomes a task of joy rather than chasing an illusion that one can never hope to reach.

13. They know that you can’t please everyone, so make sure you please yourself

Trying to make everyone in one’s life happy is, truly, an impossible task. Since each person has their own individual opinions and standards, pleasing one person is just as likely to result in the displeasure of another. The resulting frustration ends of leaving a person feeling ineffective and, somehow, to blame. For those who are truly happy, this is no longer a problem; their focus is on pleasing themselves first. This does not mean to do so at the expense of others; rather, this is acknowledging that by creating happiness internally, first, it can become easier to spread that joy to others.

14. They appreciate the necessity of change in order to grow

It is not in human nature to stay stagnant and still find satisfaction and happiness in daily life. The need to look ahead and to want to discover new vistas is the underpinning for the importance that change plays in living. Yet, many people resist and even fear change. Those who have embraced happiness understand that change is an essential part of living and embrace the challenges that change may bring with joy. When fear of the new no longer exists, the pleasure of the unfolding future can be truly appreciated.

15. They are never too busy to “stop and smell the roses”

Appreciating the beauty of the natural world and of life in general is often overlooked in the rush to get things done, get ahead, etc. This obsession with schedules and artificially constructed destinations rarely leaves time to pause and remember exactly what all of this frenetic activity is supposed to be for. Happy people are never too busy to take a moment and enjoy the world’s treasures. The pleasure of a stunning sunset, the smell of fresh cut grass, or just taking a cleansing breath while walking can provide the emotional tonic that is so needed in today’s style of living.

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16. They have learned to be still

Sometimes it is necessary to rein in the racing thoughts and feelings brought on by the near constant bombardment of information and sensory overload that one encounters during the day. The sheer volume of all of this noise can drown out the important internal voice that helps maintain direction and stability in both an emotional and spiritual sense. Learning to be still -to allow the mind and heart to gently disengage from all of the external pressure- is an important practice happy people include in their routines. That mental pause that refreshes restores the ability to smile and know that things are alright after all.

17. They comprehend that happiness isn’t everything

While being happy is certainly important, truly happy people also recognize that happiness, in and of itself, is only one piece of the great puzzle known as life. There will be times that obligations, circumstances, or the press of the moment, may leave one feeling somewhat dismayed or uncertain. Yet, it is precisely in these moments, that lessons are learned that can lead to growth and a greater appreciation of the gifts that life has in store. It is these times of challenge that add to the value of happiness and the knowledge that what may be empty at the moment will fill again in the future.

18. They are grateful

Embracing the joy of living and being grateful for the experiences life bestows is one of the hallmarks of truly happy people. This gratitude is not just lip service but a spiritual thankfulness of being alive and part of this amazing, complex, and sometimes frustrating place that humanity calls home.

19. They focus on what goes right instead of what goes wrong

When something happens, it can usually be viewed in terms of whether something went according to plan or whether things just went off the rails. Yet, in the realm of spirit, there are no absolutes. This is what happy people have learned. It is just as easy to pay attention to the things that have gone as planned and work on those areas, than it is to bemoan things that may have come up a little short.

20. They believe that you are always at the starting gate

Happy people intrinsically understand that in a true spiritual and emotionally sense, one is always at the beginning. Even when there is a transition or failure, this marks a new starting point. As a popular song once noted; “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” These beliefs that truly happy people have embraced are not exclusive. Trying them out is the best way to see if, in fact, a fresh breath of happiness will appear.

Featured photo credit: boy-524512_1280/TaniaVdB via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on April 19, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

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