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18 Things You Should Tell Yourself Every Day in The Morning!

18 Things You Should Tell Yourself Every Day in The Morning!

“Good Morning!” It is said everyday, yet do you feel it? Do you feel good every morning? Does each morning bring with it another ray of hope, a reason to fight for your dreams and keep your spirit alive? Well it should and here are a few absolute ‘musts’ to tell yourself every day, first thing in the morning, for a better, happier, more successful day, every day.

1. Today is a new day

So yesterday was a bad day and maybe so was the previous week or yesterday was good and so was the previous week, however today is a new day. It’s yet another day to make progress and change whatever I want to change and be whoever I want to be. The bad won’t last, the good won’t either, so I must do my best today.

2. Tomorrow won’t hurry up

No matter what I do, unless I have a time machine and haven’t told the world yet, tomorrow won’t hurry up. It’ll take its sweet time and creep up on me slowly. So live for today, work for today, because tomorrow will eventually come, but it won’t hurry up for me, so don’t waste today for tomorrow.

3. I am the best version of me

We’re all flawed; either we think so, or someone else thinks so. Bottom line is, no one is ever perfect. But I must bear in mind that among all these imperfections, I am the best version of me. I am unique, I am priceless and I am amazing and nothing can change that.

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4. Yesterday doesn’t define me

Yesterday is gone. All that remains of yesterday is my memory of events and successes and failures. It cannot define me and never did. I and only I can define myself.

5. Everything isn’t the way it seems

Things aren’t what they seem and that’s okay. There is always room for error and miscommunication, it doesn’t mean things are ruined, it just means life is going on as it should; a little complicated, a little predictable. So it’s okay, if things aren’t always what they seem.

6. I don’t know everything

With so much going on every day, every minute, every second, it’s okay to ask. I don’t have to know everything. I’m capable of learning what I don’t know and if I need to, I’ll ask.

7. We all have secrets

We all have secrets, some good, some not so good. My secrets are mine alone and having secrets isn’t bad and the same goes for everyone I know.

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8. I can achieve all my dreams

Age is merely a number and the months merely a restriction. I can achieve all my dreams, no matter how bizarre or unrealistic they seem to others. My dreams, like anyone else’s are valid and deserve to be worked upon. Today is a day closer to achieving my dreams.

9. Today is another miracle

A new day is a gift and today is no lesser. There are always miracles happening somewhere in the world. Just because I can’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not there. Someone is being kind, someone is caring, someone is helping, someone is trusting and that is no less that in a miracle.

10. Failures are okay

Failures are okay. Everyone fails, the important part is to get up and start over. My failures are okay. I will get up, I will start over and I will finish successfully.

11. Others don’t define me

My family, parents, siblings, college, state or political affiliation don’t define me. Nothing defines me except who I am. Others do not and never will define me, they can be a part of my life, but not who I am or who I aspire to be.

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12. I can start over anytime

Staring over doesn’t need to be solely in January. I can start over anytime, any day, anywhere. Turning a new leaf, changing something in life, isn’t a matter of the right time, it’s a matter of will power and conviction which can happen anytime, any day, anywhere. My life is in my hands.

13. Life goes on

No matter good or bad things happen, life moves on. Nothing lasts forever so even though things might be amazing or awful, life goes on and I must move on. I have to improve, become better, become who I want to be, overcome failure and heartbreaks and go on with life.

14. I don’t owe anyone anything

Who I am, what I’ve reached and where I want to go is my prerogative only. I don’t owe anyone an explanation, a reason, an apology, or anything. My life is mine and must continue to be so.

15. I deserve the best

Where I come from or who I am, doesn’t automatically dictate what I ‘deserve’. I deserve the best of everything I get and I will not be guilted into thinking otherwise.

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16. No one except me can control my happiness

Nothing controls my happiness. Some things or people might facilitate it but they can’t control it. My happiness is in my hands only and I can induce it as and when I please.

17.  Everything worth fighting for is hard to get

Life isn’t about roses. Roses are overrated anyway. If something is difficult or hard or seems impossible then I have to work harder, be stronger and work longer. Everything worths having is difficult and I can have everything I want and overcome every obstacle in the way.

18. My body, my rules

Who I am, where I’m from, what I look like, my sexual orientation and my choices are mine and mine only. No one has a right over my body. My body is mine alone no matter what anyone tells me.

Featured photo credit: Brinks Alo via flickr.com

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Sanah Rizvi

Sanah is an influential public speaker and a devoted advocator of female rights.

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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