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15 Things Only People Who Have Talkative Best Friends Would Understand

15 Things Only People Who Have Talkative Best Friends Would Understand

I myself am not a very chatty person, but I love my talkative friends. They make life oh[!] so interesting. If you are like me and have close friends or loved ones who are super talkative, then you’ll understand what I mean when I say these things about talkative friends…

1. They HAVE to tell you about their day!

They just can’t help themselves. They’ll call or come over to your place to tell you about their day. Fortunately, there is no silent or dull moment in their day. The way they describe it is so interesting that if you didn’t know any better you’d be pretty jealous.

2. Although they speak a million words a second, you always try to pay attention and listen

That’s because you love them and you don’t want to hurt their feeling by appearing not to care. Besides, if you don’t pay attention you might miss an important point in there—and that would be worse than interrupting.

3. They always have an inclination to bring up and make a commentary on random things, and it often seems like they are experts at the mundane

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boys can be so dumb

    But just because they have an opinion on everything and always talk a lot, doesn’t mean they know what they are talking about. Hilarious!

    4. Because they talk so much, they often don’t bother listening to you

    They often cut you short in mid-sentence and it makes you mad. Even when you’re mad at them though, you still know that you care about them. You understand that they HAVE to speak. It’s simply their nature.

    5. They have certain pet topics that just triggersthem to gush on and on when they come up in conversation

    …So you must always have a list of alternative, more bearable topics on hand to spring on them whenever they ratchet up on their pet topic: such as raising questions about the person they’re dating, fashion or sports.

    6. They always have a bag full of surprises and unpredictable answers to every question you throw at them

    And that is why you fear asking them some questions, because you never know what they will say or where they will take the conversation. Sometimes their answers are eye-opening; sometimes not so much.

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    7.  They’re always sharing the tiniest of details with you (and others) only to realize what a silly thing they’ve just done

    You’ve actually watched people nudge them and say “ssshhh,” when they are speaking out of place. You always feel embarrassed for them for sharing way too much information than was called for.

    8. They have a penchant for talking to themselves and having conversations in their own heads

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      That’s when they are silent (which is rare). You always wonder whether they get time to just sit and rest their brain. Still, you’re impressed how they never seem to get bored—even when they are left alone in their own company.

      9. They probably will never be able to keep a secret forever!

      That’s because you know how much they like to talk.Because they talk so much, they tend to let things slip—secrets included. It’s really not that surprising any more that they somehow always inadvertently let the cat out of the bag.

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      10. They are excellent at starting and holding conversations—even with total strangers

      …And how they are able to make new friends and hold conversations so effortlessly never ceases to amaze you. It’s still a mystery to you how they do it with a total stranger. Anyway, they have the gift of the gab and you love it because it makes you look cool and interesting by association.

      11. They are a life saver in social situations where small talk (which you hate) is expected

      You never have to worry about small talk or feel out of place when you are out with them on social gatherings, because they will always hold the conversation. When you see them in action talking to people freely it always makes you want to open up just as much as they do.

      12. You can always trust them to blurt out spoilers for the books, movie or TV show you’re watching

      oops

        And that makes you so mad—at least most of the time it does.

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        13. They are forthright and tell you like it is!

        Because they don’t keep secrets or hold back information from you, they always tell you exactly what is on their mind, especially when they are upset with you for some reason. You hate it that they are so forthright, but love it because issues in your relationship are dealt with openly.

        14. They say quirky, esoteric things that sometimes get you in trouble

        You’ve actually been sent out of places like meetings, classes or stores because they were making noise or fun of someone or something. While it’s always funny when you get in trouble with them, you’re usually not proud of what you said or did together when you think about it later.

        15. You have to expressly tell them they talk too much and should stop it now for them to stop

        …And you tell them to stop in a light-hearted way because you love them. They’re your best friend. You know one day they will be able to put their talent to the best possible use—as a storyteller, motivational speaker or even stand-up comedian.

        More by this author

        David K. William

        David is a publisher and entrepreneur who tries to help professionals grow their business and careers, and gives advice for entrepreneurs.

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        Last Updated on May 21, 2019

        How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

        How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

        For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

        If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

        Example 1

        You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

        You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

        In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

        Example 2

        You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

        People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

        You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

        Example 3

        You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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        The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

        Example 4

        You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

        Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

        If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

        Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

        • Understand your own communication style
        • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
        • Communicate with precision and care
        • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

        1. Understand Your Communication Style

        To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

        In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

        Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

        2. Learn Others Communication Styles

        Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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        If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

        “How do you prefer to receive information?”

        This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

        To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

        3. Exercise Precision and Care

        A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

        On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

        Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

        I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

        I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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        In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

        The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

        Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

        4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

        Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

        In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

        “Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

        Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

        Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

        It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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        It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

        It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

        Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

        Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

        The Bottom Line

        When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

        I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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        Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

        Reference

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