Advertising
Advertising

15 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Believe

15 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Believe

There are so many misconceptions and downright lies that most people accept wholeheartedly, while those who are truly happy with their lives know to avoid them. To be like them, check out this list of 15 things that mentally strong people don’t believe.

1. They don’t believe in the pass-fail model.

Mentally strong people don’t believe in the big red F. Every experience, even the one that didn’t go well, is something you can learn from. If you consider things that you have done in your life as simple failures, then you need to start thinking more complexly. Mentally strong people understand this, so should you.

2. They don’t believe that failure is inevitable.

Even the most disastrous circumstances can turn around, if you have the right attitude. Mentally strong people don’t believe that there is a point where you should give up, so you shouldn’t believe it either. As long as there is will there is hope, so keep pushing forward even when the odds are stacked against you.

Advertising

3. They don’t believe life is meaningless.

If mentally strong people couldn’t believe that there is a purpose to the world, they would never have become mentally strong.

4. They don’t believe things will always go the way you expect.

If you’re a pessimist, you should stop expecting storms. If you’re an optimist, you should stop assuming there will never be clouds in the sky. Always be prepared for the inevitability that our days can be very unexpected, either for good or for ill.

5. They don’t believe that there is no hope.

Mentally strong people don’t believe that there’s a dark place that you can’t crawl back from. Your hope for the future is very much in your control, so own your fears and push past them.

Advertising

6. They don’t believe that miracles don’t exist.

Unlike the overly negative, mentally strong people don’t believe that the miraculous is impossible. That doesn’t mean they believe in a higher power, per se, but they are convinced that truly great things can happen to you if you don’t let negativity get in the way.

7. They don’t believe they have to do everything perfectly.

Perfection is a myth. The circle is one of the most beautiful constructs in the world, and still it has an infinite number of decimal points. Learn to round to 3.14 in certain aspects of your life so that you don’t become obsessed with the idea of perfection.

8. They don’t believe in waiting too long for the right moment.

The right moment is when you take action, so why wait? When the opportunity is there, seize it and don’t look back.

Advertising

9. They don’t believe their past inhibits their future.

Mentally strong people don’t believe in the restraints of the past that prevent future success. Everything can be overcome, with energy and time.

10. They don’t believe they die alone.

Too many think that, no matter how many friends they have in life, everyone dies alone. Mentally strong people don’t believe that lie, understanding that the relationships you cultivate are always with you even if no one is sitting by your deathbed.

11. They don’t believe cruelty is necessary.

Mentally strong people don’t believe that you have to be mean to see results. Drill sergeants can make their cadets run a hundred laps, but positive encouragement is what will mold them into better individuals.

Advertising

12. They don’t believe they have learned all there is to learn.

Some would say they know everything they need to. Others know better. Mentally strong people don’t believe that there is ever a point where we stop learning. The world continues to change around us, so our education should be never-ending.

13. They don’t believe that they need a substance to feel better.

Many are stuck in a rut where they need something to make them feel better, whether it be drugs, alcohol, food or something else. Mentally strong people don’t believe that you can never break free of that dependence.

14. They don’t believe in weakness.

Mentally strong people are better off than most when it comes to well-being, but they don’t consider others weak for not being as happy as they are. Everyone is dealt different circumstances, and it’s a tougher road to good mental health for some than others. The mentally strong understand that fact.

15. They don’t believe change is impossible.

A lot of people refuse to accept the idea that people can change, but mentally strong people don’t believe someone can’t grow to be better. If they did, they would have never gotten to the great place they’re at today.

Featured photo credit: Happiness/Moyan Brenn via flickr.com

More by this author

Matt OKeefe

Matt is a marketer and writer who shares about lifestyle and productivity tips on Lifehack.

15 Productive Things to Do When Bored (So Time Is Not Wasted) The 10 Best Online Dictionaries 15 Easy Ways For Everyone To Make Money With Social Media 7 Ways To Give Great Feedback This Is What The Cozy Home Designed By 2000 People Looks Like

Trending in Communication

1 10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively 2 How To Be Happy Alone and Enjoy Life 3 What Is Self-Worth and How to Recognize Yours 4 How to Build Self Esteem (A Guide to Realize Your Hidden Power) 5 Why an Attitude of Gratitude Is Essential (And How to Develop It)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 6, 2020

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

Most discussions on positively influencing others eventually touch on Dale Carnegie’s seminal work, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written more than 83 years ago, the book touches on a core component of human interaction, building strong relationships. It is no wonder why.

Everything that we do hinges on our ability to connect with others and formulate deep relationships. You cannot sell a house, buy a house, advance in most careers, sell a product, pitch a story, teach a course, etc. without building healthy relationships. Managers get the best results from their teams, not through brute force, but to careful appeals to their sensibilities, occasional withdrawals from the reservoir of respect they’ve built. Using these tactics, they can influence others to excellence, to productivity, and to success.

Carnegie’s book is great. Of course, there are other resources too. Most of us have someone in our lives who positively influences us. The truth is positively influencing people is about centering the humanity of others. Chances are, you know someone who is really good at making others feel like stars. They can get you to do things that the average person cannot. Where the requests of others sound like fingernails on a chalkboard, the request from this special person sounds like music to your ears. You’re delighted to not only listen but also to oblige.

So how to influence people in a positive way? Read on for tips.

1. Be Authentic

To influence people in a positive way, be authentic. Rather than being a carbon copy of someone else’s version of authenticity, uncover what it is that makes you unique.

Discover your unique take on an issue and then live up to and honor that. Once of the reasons social media influencers are so powerful is that they have carved out a niche for themselves or taken a common issue and approached it from a novel or uncommon way. People instinctually appreciate people whose public persona matches their private values.

Contradictions bother us because we crave stability. When someone professes to be one way, but lives contrary to that profession, it signals that they are confused or untrustworthy and thereby, inauthentic. Neither of these combinations bode well for positively influencing others.

Advertising

2. Listen

Growing up, my father would tell me to listen to what others said. He told me if I listened carefully, I would know all I needed to know about a person’s character, desires and needs.

To positively influence others, you must listen to what is spoken and what is left unsaid. Therein lies the explanation for what people need in order to feel validated, supported and seen. If a person feels they are invisible, and unseen by their superiors, they are less likely to be positively influenced by that person.

Listening meets a person’s primary need of validation and acceptance.

Take a look at this guide on how to be a better listener: How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

3. Become an Expert

Most people are predisposed to listen to, if not respect, authority. If you want to positively influence others, become an authority in the area in which you seek to lead others. Research and read everything you can about the given topic, and then look for opportunities to put your education into practice.

You can argue over opinions. You cannot argue, or it is unwise to argue, over facts and experts come with facts.

4. Lead with Story

From years of working in the public relations space, I know that personal narratives, testimonials and impact stories are incredibly powerful. But I never cease to be amazed with how effective a well-timed and told story can be.

Advertising

If you want to influence people, learn to tell stories. Your stories should be related to the issue or concept you are discussing. They should be an analogy or metaphor that explains your topic in ordinary terms and in vivid detail. To learn more about how to tell powerful stories, and the ethics of storytelling, take a look at this article: How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

5. Lead by Example

It is incredibly inspiring to watch passionate, talented people at work or play. One of the reasons a person who is not an athlete can be in awe of athletic prowess is because human nature appreciates the extraordinary. When we watch the Olympics, Olympic trials, gymnastic competitions, ice skating, and other competitive sports, we can recognize the effort of people who day in and day out give their all. C

ase in point: Simone Biles. The gymnast extraordinaire won her 6TH all-around title at the U.S. Gymnastics Championships after doing a triple double. She was the first woman to do so. Watching her gave me chills. Even non-gymnasts and non-competitive athletes can appreciate the talent required to pull off such a remarkable feat.

We celebrate remarkable accomplishments and believe that their example is proof that we too can accomplish something great, even if it isn’t qualifying for the Olympics. To influence people in a positive way, we must lead by example, lead with intention and execute with excellence.

6. Catch People Doing Good

A powerful way to influence people in a positive way is to catch people doing good. Instead of looking for problems, look for successes. Look for often overlooked, but critically important things that your peers, subordinates and managers do that make the work more effective and more enjoyable.

Once you catch people doing good, name and notice their contributions.

7. Be Effusive with Praise

It did not take me long to notice a remarkable trait of a former boss. He not only began and ended meetings with praise, but he peppered praise throughout the entire meeting. He found a way to celebrate the unique attributes and skills of his team members. He was able to quickly and accurately assess what people were doing well and then let them and their colleagues know.

Advertising

Meetings were not just an occasion to go through a “To Do” list, they were opportunities to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small they are.

8. Be Kind Rather Than Right

I am going to level with you; this one is tough. It is easy to get caught up in a cycle of proving oneself. For people who lack confidence, or people who prioritize the opinions of others, being right is important. The validation that comes with being perceived as “right” feeds one’s ego. But in the quest to be “right,” we can hurt other people. Once we’ve hurt someone by being unkind, it is much harder to get them to listen to what we’re trying to influence them to do.

The antidote to influencing others via bullying is to prioritize kindness above rightness. You can be kind and still stand firm in your position. For instance, many people think that they need others to validate their experience. If a person does not see the situation you experienced in the way you see it, you get upset. But your experience is your experience.

If you and your friends go out to eat and you get food poisoning, you do not need your friends to agree that the food served at the restaurant was problematic for you. Your own experience of getting food poisoning is all the validation you need. Therefore, taking time to be right is essentially wasted and, if you were unkind in seeking validation for your food-poison experience, now you’ve really lost points.

9. Understand a Person’s Logical, Emotional and Cooperative Needs

The Center for Creative Leadership has argued that the best way to influence others is to appeal to their logical, emotional and cooperative needs. Their logical need is their rational and educational need. Their emotional need is the information that touches them in a deeply personal manner. The cooperative need is understanding the level of cooperation various individuals need and then appropriately offering it.

The trick with this system is to understand that different people need different things. For some people, a strong emotional appeal will outweigh logical explanations. For others, having an opportunity to collaborate will override emotional connection.

If you know your audience, you will know what they need in order to be positively influenced. If you have limited information about the people whom you are attempting to influence, you will be ineffective.

Advertising

10. Understand Your Lane

If you want to positively influence others, operate from your sphere of influence. Operate from your place of expertise. Leave everything else to others. Gone are the days when being a jack of all trades is celebrated.

Most people appreciate brands that understand their target audience and then deliver on what that audience wants. When you focus on what you are uniquely gifted and qualified to do, and then offer that gift to the people who need it, you are likely more effective. This effectiveness is attractive.

You cannot positively influence others if you are more preoccupied by what others do well versus what you do well.

Final Thoughts

Influencing people is about centering your humanity. If you want to influence others positively, focus on the way you communicate and improve the relationship with yourself first.

It’s hard to influence others if you’re still trying to figure out how to communicate with yourself.

More Tips About Making Influence

Featured photo credit: Wonderlane via unsplash.com

Read Next