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15 Struggles Only Mature People Would Understand

15 Struggles Only Mature People Would Understand

We all have to mature someday. Facing this period of our lives may seem daunting. Yet, growth is important to be the best you can be. With such growth comes certain realizations of owning up to what life has presented us with.

1. You don’t have to always please others

Pleasing others becomes secondary as you mature. Maturing means you define your priorities and honestly deal with decisions. You see the world from your own eyes rather than from the eyes of your friends or others.

2. You become responsible for your actions

As you grow older and become matured you understand the importance of taking responsibility. It is a tough battle to prove to the world how skillful and prepared you are. But it could become a better choice than blaming everyone else for your problems and challenges.

3. You have to deal with your emotions

Negative emotions like anger, disappointment and regret have a way of giving way to positive feelings like forgiveness, tolerance and optimism when you become matured. You have to be able to deal with your feelings and build a strong character from it.

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4. You have to delay gratification

You are not a victim of impulsive actions. You don’t only think through your actions, but you analyze them carefully. You want the best for yourself and getting that may mean saying no more often, which can be a tough challenge many times.

5. You know how important your self-respect is

Bruised ego and a burnt soul is something that has to be far away from you. You want to be an ideal character people can look up to and admire. You are more conscious of the things you say and do as you mature.

6. You have to become more adaptable

Working under a terrible boss, being in the wrong company or facing difficult times are things you can adjust to rather than simply retreating from. In the past you would have thrown the towel to bitter challenges but rather than take the easy way out, you toughen up and face up to challenges.

7. You have to appreciate money as a tool rather than an item

Growing up you may not have discovered what money really means because you were not working as hard for it until you matured. Money has to become a tool to getting the right things done, rather than an ornament to be boastful about. You appreciate the essence of every dollar you earn and are more meticulous with the way you handle it.

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8. You have to tolerate others

Arguing and trying to get your way must have being fun and exciting in the past but maturity comes with the knowing that getting your way could mean losing a friend or hurting someone you care about. You have to become more accommodating and incisive with how you treat others.

9. You have to appreciate relationships better

Missing your sister’s wedding may be a simpler choice, but you understand the importance of being there for her and showing the family that you can be there for her during her special moments. You have to value relationships that count and commit yourself to them.

10. You have to make smart decisions

Making decisions or picking the right choices is not easy for anyone – but it has to become an easy task if you want to make a positive impact to your surroundings.

11. You know the world is not about you

You have to respect other people’s opinions and beliefs. You have to understand that other people matter too and the world is not made for only you.

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12. You have to manage criticism

As you grow older you learn that criticism is an important element of life. Whether you are successful or not you will receive them. This is why you have to toughen up and handle criticism the matured way.

13. You have to pay attention to your health

Becoming more matured means that your health would come with some challenges. Your body becomes a tool for success and you have to deal with any issues it presents. You are meticulous about what you eat and drink. Protecting your body becomes your responsibility.

14. You have to love someone

Although being alone provides pleasure you also understand that you have to commit to someone emotionally. Loving someone other than yourself takes courage but with maturity this has to take a more serious direction.

15. You have to worry less

No matter what you are going through you know you can’t solve anything by worrying a lot. You have to manage your negative emotions and channel it positively instead.

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Maturing can be exciting and challenging but with it comes a sense of ownership and this independence we all have to meet.

Featured photo credit: http://www.unsplash.com via download.unsplash.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on August 4, 2020

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

The Gentle Art of Saying No For a Less Stressful Life

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here’s how to master the Gentle Art of Saying No:

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1. Value Your Time

Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”

2. Know Your Priorities

Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time?

For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.

3. Practice Saying No

Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.

4. Don’t Apologize

A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.

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5. Stop Being Nice

Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets.

Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.

6. Say No to Your Boss

Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no,” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning.

But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.

7. Pre-Empting

It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting,

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“Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”

8. Get Back to You

Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them:

“After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.”

At least you gave it some consideration.

9. Maybe Later

If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say,

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“This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].”

Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.

10. It’s Not You, It’s Me

This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often, the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time.

Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

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Featured photo credit: Kyle Glenn via unsplash.com

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