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15 Signs You Have the Coolest Brother in the World

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15 Signs You Have the Coolest Brother in the World

My only sibling is my brother, five years older than I. Yes, I am that lucky girl who has the coolest brother in the world. But it is not necessary that only elder brothers are the coolest. Younger brothers can be equally chilled out. Here are 15 ways to know if you are lucky to have the coolest brother in the world.

1. You see him as your best confidant.

Your brother was the first person to know about your little secret. You would make him cross-upon-your-heart before letting out that top-secret of yours, but deep down you knew he would not spill it out. The secret might have been a small-bore, but he would pretend it was of great matter. And after all these years, he is still your first person to whom you will run to with a secret.

2. You have a brother who’s your best buddy.

He is your first best friend. No one will doubt that, given that the ample of times you guys have spent together as children. His friends are your friends too, and vice versa. You still prefer to get drunk in his company than you would with your friends. And you would still sit in the dark and watch horror movies with him, knowing that he would laugh at your face while you scream away, and would constantly tease you later. You thoroughly enjoy it as much as you hate it.

3. You may be his best buddy, but he knows your limits too.

This is the case when you have an elder brother. He may know all (okay, nearly all) your secrets, and know you smoke and have a crush on one of his friends, still he would be the one to correct your mistakes and make sure you know your limits too. Scolding is another option mostly preferred by the brothers to keep you in control!

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4. You ask him for knowledge.

Brothers are the best teachers you can ever ask for! Whether you want to know about the meaning of life, or those subjects you constantly fail to comprehend at school, or the secret behind WWE, it is always your brother who would answer your every question. You love the way he patiently explains it to you, despite your constant I-still-don’t-understands.

5. You know he knows you inside out, and outside in.

You can not hide anything from your brother. Anything. Even if you are upset and you have been crying away secretly, your brother will still know it. Maybe because you guys have been growing up and literally facing the same kinds of situations together. You also know that even after all these years he still understands you like no other person more than him.

6. You can start a conversation right where you have left it.

This is an amazing part of having a cool brother. He doesn’t mind whether you have abruptly hung up the phone, or you have left the room in the middle of a conversation. Because, at the end of the day, you can easily start off right where you have left it. It does not matter where you are residing. It does not matter how long you have not met each other. It also does not matter if you talk or Skype once in a blue moon.

7. You guys are the perfect partners-in-crime.

My brother was always the Batman whereas I was his Robin. We would cook up crimes and pretend to rescue each other. Another time, he would become a world famous detective, and I, his loyal assistant. And if anyone tried to bully me, my brother would come to save me. He would still do this for me, despite living oceans apart and growing up into full bloom adults!

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8. You know that your biggest supporter is your brother!

It does not matter whether you are a star soccer player in your school, or a geek who nails science projects every single time, or a person with no talent at all, you brother will always be your biggest supporter! He will cheer for you, and will look through all your faults. He will make you believe in yourself; one of the best parts of having a cool bro!

9. You have a permanent bank in him.

Need money? But you don’t want to go through all the process of “verbally” filling up the form (your dad or mom WILL ASK you anyway)? That is where the elder-brother-the-bank comes in. He is just like an ATM machine. Ask for it, and you get it. Unless of course you ask for a bigger dough, he wouldn’t usually question back. Despite earning my own money, I still ask for greens from my brother. I guess I am used to it.

10. You can talk shit with him.

Here’s a little open secret: my brother and I carry out most of our conversations while pooping. We believe it has a special privacy in it. No one gets to hear you, and it’s more like our comfort zone during secret sharing. And if you are having problems with your bathroom he’s the perfect man to talk about it!

11. You have an adviser, dear.

Now talking about seeking help you have the best adviser right inside your house. It is not necessary what range of topics you need advise on, he will readily aid you. You need advise in dating? You need advise regarding fashion? Or, maybe what subjects to choose in your high school? You are confused about your career? You are frustrated with your life? Well, your brother is there my dear, and his advises are totally free of cost!

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12. You are happy he bonds with your partner.

This is especially to the girls out there who have elder brothers. While I was dating my then boyfriend (who is my hubby now), the only person I wanted him to bond with was my brother. And oh man was I relieved when both the men started hanging out like buddies! I guess you have that similar butterflies in your stomachs while introducing your partner to your brother, and hope against all the hopes that they bond utimately.

13. Your brother is always in your team.

Sports or not, your brother will always be in your league. He will stand for you, he will always put you first in front of your family or friends, and even he will prefer to have you in his sports team. He will make sure you are at ease regardless of whatever situation you are facing.

14. You have a spoiler alert!

Whether your brother is older than you or younger, he will always spoil you in his own way. Your younger brother will nearly tend to all your needs. He will grumble, but he will complete the task. It’s actually cute when he goes out in the rain to bring you KFC that you suddenly craved for. And it is similar with the elder brothers too. Isn’t it best to have cool brothers in the world?

15. You get a comic relief during tough times.

Your brother is ALWAYS there to bring back your smile. My brother was cracking jokes on my wedding day, before I was leaving for my husband’s house. The reason? So that I don’t cry and spoil my make-up! Only cool bros will come up with something as bizarre as being the comic relief in your life when you least expect it!

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Personally I believe that having the coolest brother in the world is an amazing blessing. No one can take over your brother’s place. He is someone who loves you unconditionally. And like all other proud siblings, I would say, I love you too my brother!

Featured photo credit: ordianry miracles & the crazy 9 via flickr.com

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Sumaiya Kabir

Sumaiya is a passionate writer who shares thoughts and ideas to help people improve themselves.

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Last Updated on July 20, 2021

How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

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How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

“Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

Warming up

If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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  1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
  2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
  3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

Stay hydrated

Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

Meditate

Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

2. Focus on your goal

One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

3. Convert negativity to positivity

There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

4. Understand your content

Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

“No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

5. Practice makes perfect

Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

6. Be authentic

There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

7. Post speech evaluation

Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

Improve your next speech

As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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  • How did I do?
  • Are there any areas for improvement?
  • Did I sound or look stressed?
  • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
  • Was I saying “um” too often?
  • How was the flow of the speech?

Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

Reference

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