Do you worry that you could seem selfish? Many people worry about how they come across to other people, but often people confuse being selfish with loving yourself and having self-respect. People who love themselves are often much happier, so it can be beneficial to embrace these so-called ‘selfish’ traits.
Here are 12 things that people may find selfish, but are actually not.
1. You Aren’t Selfish For Being Motivated
Do not feel ashamed or worried about being motivated. Whether you do overtime every week or run every morning, be proud of yourself for caring and pushing yourself. People may perceive this as selfish, but this may be for their own selfish reasons, like needing you to be around more often to help them with their needs.
2. You Aren’t Selfish For Not Apologising If You’re Not Sorry
It is important to stand up for your beliefs and opinions – these shape who you are as a person, and you should be proud of them. Listen to other’s opinions with an open mind and share your own in the knowledge that you are not being selfish.
3. You Aren’t Selfish For Ending A Toxic Relationship
Being aware you are in an unhealthy relationship and taking action requires self-respect. Be proud to surround yourself with people who celebrate who you are and bring no toxic elements into your life.
4. You Aren’t Selfish For Having Different Life Priorities Than Others
If something is important to you, then it is important. If someone make you feel guilty for wanting to travel or work, they are being selfish themselves. Take care of your own priorities, and the people who truly care about you will understand and respect that.
5. You Aren’t Selfish For Enjoying Time Alone
Taking ‘me’ time and looking after your own needs is a very important part of your general happiness. Anyone who begrudges your time alone may themselves struggle to be alone, so realize this is their problem and not a fault of your own.
6. You Aren’t Selfish Because You Like To Treat Yourself
As well as treating your friends and loved ones, it is essential to treat yourself, as you should love yourself just as much as you love the important people in your life. While it is selfish to only treat yourself, realize your happiness is your priority – so make yourself happy!
7. You Aren’t Selfish For Saying No
Saying no and having limitations is a sign of your self-respect. You don’t have to agree to do something if you don’t want to; most successful people have become so successful due to their ability to say no. Be polite and gracious about saying no, and realize it isn’t selfish to focus on your own goals – you simply know your priorities.
8. You Aren’t Selfish For Making Different Decisions Than Others
If you want to live outside of other people’s conventions, that is fine. If you don’t want to get married, or have children, or even have a normal job – that is your choice and no-one else’s. Making that choice for someone else is selfish, but choosing it for yourself simply means you know what you want from life.
9. You Aren’t Selfish Because You’re Not Perfect
No-one is perfect, and worrying about being perfect can be emotionally damaging. Embrace your flaws and work on any that you would like to change – this shows progression and self-awareness, rather than selfishness.
10. You Aren’t Selfish For Following Your Dreams
If you need to move to the other side of the world to follow your dreams, that is fine. If you need to quit your job and go back to college, that is fine too. Don’t let yourself live a life of regret because you were worried about being selfish.
11. You Aren’t Selfish For Standing Your Ground
Sticking up for your opinions shows you care about what you believe in. Whether it is your morals, ethics, political or religious beliefs, they are yours and you have a right to think them. If you are open to other people’s ideas and accept there are different ways of thinking, you are safe in the knowledge that you are not selfish.
12. You Aren’t Selfish For Not Replying To People Immediately
While it can be selfish to purposefully ignore people who are counting on you, it is not selfish to prioritize. If you have received a text and you are halfway through cooking, it is totally acceptable to finish up what you are doing before you reply. You will get back to them – you don’t need to put everything on hold to reply to someone.
Can you think of any other traits people often believe are selfish? Comment your ideas below!
Featured photo credit: Natalie Shuttleworth via flickr.com