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10 Ways To Save A Dying Friendship

10 Ways To Save A Dying Friendship

Having good friends can lead to happier, more connected lives. However, sometimes friendships aren’t easy to maintain. We all have lots of obligations pulling at our time: busy schedules, needy family members, work lives, volunteer responsibilities, etc. Even though friendships can be the first thing to go when your schedule gets tight, keeping connected to friends is essential to a happy life.  Here are 10 ways to take your friendships from failing to fabulous.

1. Make time for your friends.

Next time one of your friends calls you and wants to do something, say yes. Spending time together will bring your relationship back from the brink.

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2. Send a thoughtful gift.

If your relationship is already on the rocks, you’ll need to do something that requires a little effort. The easiest way show someone you care is a thoughtful gift. It shows someone you took time out of your busy life to do something nice for them. It doesn’t have to be expensive—you could just send them their favorite snack.

3. Send a note.

Don’t you love getting mail? Especially mail that is not a bill? Your friend will too. A note is one of the nicest things to receive. It doesn’t have to be complicated—just telling your friend you are thinking about them will go a long way.

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4. Remind your friend of the good times.

Sometimes we go through a rough patch with friends because there are too many arguments and not enough laughs.  If you’re having a hard time getting past a disagreement, remind your friend of a good time you’ve had together. This will help him or her associate your friendship with good memories.

5. Apologize.

One of the biggest reasons a friendship dies is because of conflict. Did you have a fight? Or, are you holding a grudge? The easiest way to get over it is to apologize—even if you don’t think you did anything wrong. You can say something like “I’m sorry for making your feel…”  By validating your friend’s feelings, you will be able to get over the argument and back into the friendship.

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6. Give your friend a call.

Sometimes, a friendship dies simply because we forget to make time for each other. To stop this slow, painful death, just pick up the phone. Tell your friend you’re thinking about them. Maybe even set up a time to see each other again.

7. Set up a lunch date.

Getting together is the easiest way to reconnect. One of my favorite ways to connect with friends is over lunch. Lunch is casual, and it is usually a bright spot in everyone’s day. So, by getting together for lunch, your friend will associate you will a fun time that he or she looks forward to.

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8. Schedule a regular activity you can do together.

A regularly-scheduled activity is even better than a one-time lunch date. Plan to take a walk together once a week, or plan to go shopping once a month. Friends can help make mundane activities feel fun.

9. Do something exciting together.

Adrenaline builds connections—fast. So, think about zip-lining, rock climbing, or running a race together. This way, you can conquer a challenge, and conquer your dying friendship.

10. Be interested in your friend’s life.

Make sure that when you get together with friends you don’t just talk about your own life. Ask questions about their life, and make sure you are interested in what they are saying. You can offer advice and support where it’s needed, and become a trusted adviser and confidant.

Make sure to cultivate your friendships. They can bring laughter when you need to smile and support when you need someone to lean on. Without friends, life can get lonely and boring. So, pick up the phone today and take your friendships from on the rocks to better than ever.

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Last Updated on February 18, 2019

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

The ability to reinvent and redefine yourself is a bold, daring and purposeful choice. It doesn’t just happen. You have to make a conscious, intentional choice and then follow through.

If the thought of forging a new path, changing habits, thought patterns and your inner circle of friends scares you – you’re not alone. Change can be a very scary thing. It takes courage, fortitude and a bit of faith to decide to shed your old self and don a new persona. However, it is one of the most critical processes one must repeatedly endure in the pursuit of destiny. Change unlocks new levels of potential.

The Need for Change

Everyday when we wake up, we make a decision. We decide to follow our routine or we decide to go off script and shake things up a bit. For those who are creatures of habit, routine is comfortable, easy and produces very little stress. The problem with this is, after a while you stop growing.

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We all reinvent ourselves at some point in our lives. It is absolutely necessary to achieve certain levels of success.

Reflect back on who you were as a teenager and then who you were at 25. Those are two very different people. Most of us are completely different. Your thought patterns changed, your appearance, job, level of education and even your friends– changed. We like to refer to this as “growing up” or maturing and consider it to be one of life’s natural progressions. However the changes you made were purposeful and deliberate.

This process must be a lifelong and continuous cycle. You are never too old to refresh yourself.

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Happy_old_man

    Signs It’s Time to Redefine

    “Just as established products and brands need updating to stay alive and vibrant, you periodically need to refresh or reinvent yourself.”– Mireille Guiliano

    So how do you know when it’s time for a system upgrade? There are signs along the way that alert you that it is time for an overhaul. The first sign is the feeling of being stuck. If you feel like you are in a rut, you’re bored with life or you need some newness and excitement, a self reinvention may be in order. Re-evaluate your life vision and your goals. Is that vision still valid and are your goals consistent with your vision and–are they achievable? If you are off course, it’s time for a change. If you are not moving forward and making progress, it’s time for a change.

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    In life, there’s no such thing as neutrality–you’re either moving forward or you are moving backward. Time constantly moves forward and if you are standing still, you are actually losing ground. No matter your age or stage in life– there is always room for improvement.

    “You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” ~C. S. Lewis

    The second sign that you are due for a change is the occurrence of major life events in which change is forced upon you. Getting married, starting a new job, being promoted, ending a relationship, becoming a parenting or relocating are all prime opportunities to completely overhaul your life.

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    When these major shifts occur in your life–you have to shift with them. You can’t have a single mentality and have a successful marriage. You can’t remain selfish and irresponsible, and raise a healthy, well-adjusted child. You can’t be promoted to a supervisory position and keep the same subordinate attitude. Each level of success requires something different from you.

    Aronld in Predator

      Consider, for a moment, Arnold Schwarzenegger. People may have different opinions about his character and some of his life choices, but he is a master at reinventing himself. He achieved the ultimate success as a professional body builder by earning the title “Mr. Universe” three times. He then earned a tremendous amount of fame and fortune in the entertainment industry making action/adventure films. And in his latest role, he served two terms as the Governor of California. He succeeded as a professional body builder, a film star and a politician. Each role required massive amounts of change, commitment, strength and hard work.

      And if Arnold can do it…so can you!

      Featured photo credit: BK via flickr.com

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