Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on February 1, 2018

5 Must Read Books that Will Save You from Fighting in Your Relationship

5 Must Read Books that Will Save You from Fighting in Your Relationship

What really causes you to fight with your partner?  Although the triggers are often superficial, the underlying answers are deeper – which is why most couples are stuck in endless loops where they keep fighting about the same things over and over again.

If you want to really understand the answer to this question, it’s paramount to take some time to understand the real reasons that ultimately cause our repeating patterns of conflict.

These 5 books will teach you new ways to understand both yourself and your partner, and what drives the patterns of behavior you both subconsciously follow every day.  They can shed light on many of your questions, backed by countless success stories from readers who have made breakthroughs in their relationships.

Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married By Gary D. Chapman

Advertising

    To most of us, getting married is just another “official” step forward from our current relationship. No one would think being prepared is necessary since going through a normal relationship already seems to be a prerequisite. However, there’s a huge gap between being in a relationship to actually building a life together. Gary Chapman has put together this practical book to teach readers how to build a healthy and loving marriage.

    “I’m a 30 year old male about to propose to my girlfriend. I picked up this book on a whim. I cannot overstate how much I have learned from this book. I started highlighting things that I thought were important to me or that really hit home or made sense. I wrote notes in the margin. I ordered a copy for my soon to be fiance and she is going to do the same thing with her copy. Then we’ll switch so we can both learn from each other. Anyone that wants to be a better partner, regardless of weather or not that includes marriage, should pick this book up and read it front to back. I really can’t say enough good things about this book.”- Ryan on Amazon Review

    Get Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married from Amazon at $ 8.69.

    The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts By Gary D. Chapman & Jocelyn Green

    Advertising

      Joined with Joycelyn Green, Gary Chapman has published this book that decodes the secret of love. It’s one of the top selling relationship books on Amazon. Gary talks about what signals us as “love”, how partners can see the same action differently and brings out the importance of understanding your partner’s love language in order to aid better communication. The love language doesn’t only apply to romantic relationships, it’s also equally applicable to building sustainable friendships and family relationships as well.

      Get The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts from Amazon at $ 10.99.

      Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs By Emerson Eggerichs

        Dr. Emerson Eggerichs provides advice from a psychological perspective on how to maintain a healthy and loving marriage. In his book, he cracks the relationship secret by teaching readers how to shift their focus from only their relationship to the whole family perspective. He also addresses some commonly experienced marriage problems such as dealing with affairs, how to regain the romantic spark, and how to protect and nurture mutual respect.

        Advertising

        Get Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs from Amazon at $13.89.

        Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love By Sue Johnson

          Hold Me Tight is one of the most insightful books about human relationships that you’ll ever read, backed by solid empirical scientific proof and a ton of success cases.  In an engaging and easy-to-read style, Dr. Sue Johnson introduces psychological concepts that any lay person can instantly understand.  You’ll gain deep insights into every relationship that you’ve ever had, and understand the underlying forces behind how and why we communicate the way we do.  Filled with simple exercises for practicing better communication and understanding, this book is useful for anyone, whether you’re in a relationship or not.

          Get Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love from Amazon at $17.48.

          Advertising

          Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find – and Keep – Love By Amir Levine & Rachel Heller

            Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller (a psychiatrist and neuroscientist, respectively) explain love through the latest scientific theories on attachment.  This book describes the three basic types of attachment that all people have.  These basic types affect relationships at all levels, from how you see intimacy, to communication style, to the types of things that satisfy you within a relationships.  The premise is that understanding the attachment type of you and your partner will help you navigate your relationship with more awareness, avoiding common pitfalls and being able to focus on the right things to nurture a relationship.

            Get Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find- and Keep- Love from Amazon at $10.84.

            More by this author

            Lifehack Reads

            Lifehack Reads is the curated collection of our favorite books, carefully categorized and sorted by our Editorial Team.

            10 Inspirational Books That Can Change Your Life 27 Must Read Books Every Novel Lover Should Read at Least Once 1 Minute Book Summary: 59 Seconds 2 Minutes Book Summary: How the World Sees You Good Book to Read: What I Know For Sure

            Trending in Social Animal

            1 Understand Your Love Style & Learn to Love: Co Dependent Relationship 2 17 Ideas to Keep Your Love and Marriage Strong Through Thick and Thin 3 12 Tips for Parenting the Strong Willed Child in a Compassionate Way 4 Coparenting 101: 17 Helpful Strategies for Divorced Parents 5 These Critical Crisis Management Tips Will Make You a Better Friend

            Read Next

            Advertising
            Advertising

            Last Updated on September 20, 2018

            7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

            7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

            What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

            For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

            It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

            1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

            The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

            What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

            The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

            Advertising

            2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

            Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

            How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

            If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

            Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

            3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

            Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

            If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

            Advertising

            These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

            What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

            4. What are my goals in life?

            Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

            Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

            5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

            Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

            Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

            Advertising

            You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

            Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

            6. What do I not like to do?

            An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

            What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

            Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

            The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

            Advertising

            7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

            Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

            But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

            “What do I want to do with my life?”

            So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

            Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

            Reference

            Read Next