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I Love You: To Say, or Not to Say

I Love You: To Say, or Not to Say

We have all been there, deep in emotions, with our hearts fluttering. Every time you see that person who gives you butterflies in your stomach, your eyes and gestures give it away: you love them. But the age old notion, the question stays the same: Should I say it or not? When to say I love you?

Love is beautiful.

Being in love is great. It’s wonderful to find someone you love to share your life with, to start and end your day with and be happy to return to.

But it’s not easy for an individual to just determine when is the right time to confess their love to the other person.

Forget time, some are just honestly confused about whether to say it or not. This happens more often than not, to us, especially the younger lot who barely believe in love anymore.

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The best timing to speak the three magical words.

There are several things that make you wonder whether you should say those three precious words or not.

It’s the fear of rejection, the fear of getting hurt, coming across as desperate, and just constant ego clashes.

But know that, saying ‘I Love You’ at some point in your life is very important and we know exactly when is the right time for you to say it.

When you know your feeling is true.

Firstly, you need to know that if your emotions are genuine or not. It can be just be an infatuation. But once you are sure of your feelings, know that there’s no looking back.

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You are about to change the way someone looks at you forever. We’d suggest for you to wait till the other person is at ease with you. Bombarding someone with an I love you in a third date wouldn’t work well. Once the other person is comfortable with you, make sure you drop a few hints.

No, we aren’t asking you to just explicitly go around making people nervous, just tell them how much you love spending time with them and how big a part of your life they are. They need to know that they are special.

Those three words mean a lot, you are becoming each other’s most important person from then onwards in no time or you are in for a bit of embarrassment. So, don’t use it easily. It’s powerful.

Try the minimalistic approach.

There is also a set of people who believe that, these words need to be said with a gesture. That’s a misconception. We have heard terrible stories of people going overboard with shiny candles and beds of roses, and getting turned down.

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It’s good to have a gesture, but know that you will never now if you are gonna date the person from then onwards with certainty.

So keep it minimal, go for flowers, chocolates or a book they love. These little gestures can back your next move up. Do it at memorable place so that if it works out, you will have a great story to say.

Remember that love can’t be forced.

One thing we would like to mention here is that love can’t be forced. We have time and again, though Bollywood has created this pseudo reality that is pestering works to win love in return. It doesn’t.

Troubling people, following them anywhere to create scenes and borderline stalking them isn’t acceptable. True love doesn’t force, I love you isn’t your license to own people.

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Be true, like your love.

Most importantly, be brave, be confident, be genuine, don’t be superficial or shallow! Be prepared for the worst, yet be hopeful.

Know that those words behold immense power. Power to change life. Confess your love, embrace it and if you are heartbroken, pick yourself up and smile.

Because, it’s the most beautiful thing. Feel grateful you had that gift. Soak it all in its glory!

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Abhay Jeet Mishra

Writer at Lifehack & Enterested.com

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Last Updated on April 1, 2019

How to Be Happy: Why Pursuing Happiness Will Make You Unhappy

How to Be Happy: Why Pursuing Happiness Will Make You Unhappy

When we talk about happiness, we often think about staying happy all the time – every single day, every single minute with zero negativity. Many try to pursue this constant state of “happiness” as their ultimate goal, and avoid anything that may take it away from them.

But, what is the meaning of this type of “happiness”?

It’s a lot like your favorite food. The more often you have it isn’t always better. On the contrary, when you only have a chance to eat it sparingly, that’s when you really savor every bite. So is it the food itself that makes you happy, or is it how valuable it is to you when you are eating it?

Always remember that only by experiencing sadness do we understand what it is to be happy.

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Video Summary

Don’t Assume Others Are Always Happy

Most people see those who have seemingly perfect lives and assume they are happy all the time. Since childhood, we are conditioned to chase the idea of “happily-ever-after” that we see in fairytales. On social media, everyone tends to share only the best looking aspects of their lives. So, it’s very easy to have a distorted view of what “happiness” is around us.

In reality, there is always something missing, something lacking, or something unpleasant.

No one has a perfect life. Even the most glamorous celebrities or the richest billionaires have their own set of challenges and problems.

When we feel negative, we’re only focusing on a small fluctuating curve. As CEO of Lifehack, I’ve had to deal with countless problems, and some of them felt like real setbacks at the time. During those moments, it really seemed like these problems would be the life or death of my company and my life goals. But, I got through them; and, weeks, months and eventually years passed with many more ups and downs.

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You need to keep your sights on the extended curve.  Looking back now, a lot of those “really big” problems at the time now seem like only small blips in a long line of experiences. Recalling them in my mind now makes me smile!

Stop Trying to Be Happy–Just Be

It’s natural to want to be happy as often as possible.

So what can we do?

First, throw away the belief that a perfect life means happiness. Personally, I would be miserable if everything was perfect. It’s through experiencing the pains of lifelong challenges that drives us to care for others when they are experiencing similar trials. If life was perfect, you wouldn’t be able to empathize. If life was perfect, you wouldn’t grow.

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To be truly happy, stop chasing permanent happiness.

It sounds like a paradox. But, what I mean is to accept that there will be ups and downs throughout life. Gracefully understand that happiness is a fluctuation of positive and negative events.

Understand the importance of gratitude. Instead of focusing on the unpleasant moment, flash back your memory to when you didn’t have something. I like to think about my career, for example. When I didn’t have a career I was passionate about, I felt lost and demotivated. I felt like everyone was figuring out their lives but me. But, when I found my purpose and started Lifehack, I was deeply happy, even before I realized I would be successful! This memory keeps me going when I hit tough spots. It takes the darkness to make us grateful for the light.

Happiness and Sadness Exist Together

What it all comes down to is this: your life will be filled with beautiful, happy and incredible moments–happy tears and joyous shouts and funny stories. But, your life will also be filled with rain and storms that never seem like they will pass while you’re going through them.

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But, whether your face is warmed by the sunshine, or your heart is dampened by the rain, know that it’s all part of the ebb and flow of life.

Treasure the happy moments and power through the sad ones. Don’t try to avoid “sad” or “negative” experiences, and blindly chase being “happy”. In the end you will achieve a true level of contentment in your life, based on meaningful experiences and achievements. Being able to create growth and meaning out of both positive and negative events — that is the true meaning of “happiness”.

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