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How To Tell Someone You Love Them Subtly Yet Sweetly (100 Ways Provided)

How To Tell Someone You Love Them Subtly Yet Sweetly (100 Ways Provided)

For all of their love, strength, and beauty, relationships can be fragile things and, much like a delicate plant, must be watered and fed if you want them to survive.

The biggest reason couples fall out of love is simple: they don’t feel loved by their partner. Why? Because even though they may say “I love you” at the end of phone calls and before heading off to work, those words have no magic if not backed by thousands of other simple gestures.

100 small things to make someone feel loved

  1. Don’t forget to hug before you say goodbye. Physical gestures often go undervalued after a relationship has been going on for a while.
  2. Tell them how special they are to you. This goes beyond just saying, “I love you”.
  3. Express understanding when it’s needed by saying, “I understand how you feel.” If you don’t understand, express your desire to by saying something like, “Tell me how you feel so that I can understand.”
  4. Tell them frequently how much you appreciate it when they do things for you. We often get used to how much our spouses or partners do for us and tend to forget how much easier they make our lives.
  5. Tell them how much you enjoy certain aspects of their personality. For example, “I love your sense of humor.” You need to be praised for who you are and so do they.
  6. Go an entire day with your partner without saying anything but positive praise. You can make this as frequent a practice as you like.
  7. Fix your partner their favorite food without them asking.
  8. Offer to help cook.
  9. If you have kids, offer to take them out so your partner can spend some relaxing time alone. Alone time is important!
  10. Send an intimate text message to your partner for no reason.
  11. Email your partner while they’re at work just to see how they’re doing.
  12. Call your partner when they’re on break just to say hi.
  13. Reach across the car, the table, or the couch to touch their hand, if only for a moment.
  14. Pull out their chair, or open the door for them- chivalry, guys!
  15. Remember to give them a smile. I don’t mean smile at them or fake it. I mean giving them their own personal smile- the one you save for them.
  16. Instead of taking your frustrations out on them after a hard day, say, “I really needed to see you today because … “, or, “I had a hard day and I need a hug.” They probably aren’t the cause of your bad mood, so let them help you out.
  17. Joke and laugh, and laugh with them.
  18. Go to bed at the same time for a week. Talk or read together, or just sit quietly.
  19. If you have children, compliment your partner or spouse in front of them. This will make your kids happy, too!
  20. Brag about your partner in public. Yes, they may turn beet red if they’re shy, but they’ll appreciate it.
  21. Try to avoid their pet peeves (e.g. sponge left in the sink or toilet seat left up). You may think they’re silly but it’s important to them.
  22. Light a candle or two when you have dinner together to make the atmosphere more romantic, just because.
  23. Find creative ways to tell each other “I love you” in code.
  24. Have date nights. Go out or stay in, but make the night about one another.
  25. Pick her some flowers.
  26. Offer to watch a movie with them that they like.
  27. Give them a massage after a long day, or for no reason at all.
  28. Tell them they’re your best friend.
  29. Don’t be shy about sharing your feelings. Let them know if you’re happy or unhappy at the moment, and why.
  30. Listen when they tell you how they’re feeling.
  31. Buy small “just because” presents outside of a holiday or birthday.
  32. Write intimate messages on a piece of paper and slip it into their bag for them to find.
  33. Hold hands in public.
  34. Take lessons together. It doesn’t matter what kind.
  35. Apologize when you make a mistake.
  36. Let them be right sometimes.
  37. Play games from your childhood together.
  38. Give your partner space when they need it. But let them know you’re there when they need you.
  39. Run a hot bath for your partner when they seem stressed.
  40. Wash your partner’s car for them.
  41. Put a cute little toy that reminds them of you in their glove compartment.
  42. Try to do one random act of kindness every day for your partner.
  43. Try new activities together. Challenging ones are the best.
  44. Take a day off work every once in a while to spend doing nothing together.
  45. Let your partner sleep in. Turn off their alarm.
  46. And bring them breakfast in bed.
  47. Remind your partner that they’re hot or sexy.
  48. Take bike rides or go for walks together.
  49. Wear matching outfits every so often.
  50. Keep your partner’s favorite snacks on hand at all times.
  51. Volunteer together.
  52. Do each other’s hair.
  53. Create goals as a couple. They can be about fitness, finance, personal-growth, etc.
  54. Take an unplanned vacation together.
  55. Plan a special day for your partner.
  56. Use a photo of them as the wallpaper on your phone, and show them that.
  57. Do a chore that he/she usually does.
  58. Keep a shared journal between the two of you.
  59. Accompany him to game night/football night and be “one of the guys”.
  60. Take time to get to know your partner’s friends.
  61. Let your partner have a guys/girls night out sometimes.
  62. Put on your partner’s favorite song or music and invite them to dance.
  63. Be silly sometimes. Make fun of yourselves. Don’t be too serious.
  64. Sing for your partner or play them something if you’re instrumentally inclined.
  65. Tell them, “I’m more in love with you than I was yesterday.”
  66. When you’re having a bad day, lighten the mood by saying, “I hate everything today– but you’re pretty cool, as always.”
  67. Tell them that you think they’re even more attractive than when you met them.
  68. Tell them you were thinking about them.
  69. Tell them you support them.
  70. Tell them you love their body and mind.
  71. Tell them what made you happy today, and how it reminded you of them.
  72. Ask them how their day was.
  73. Say good morning every day.
  74. Say goodnight every night.
  75. Make sure they know you’re their “number one”.
  76. Show your partner you respect them by listening to their opinions on important decisions, and actually act on them.
  77. Tell them you appreciate what’s good about their opinions, even when you disagree with them.
  78. Lovingly tease them. Call them names too sickeningly sweet for anyone else.
  79. Flirt! Everyone enjoys flirting.
  80. Ask them to choose your outfit for work.
  81. Go to the gym together.
  82. Write a poem or song for your partner, even if it’s goofy.
  83. Make your partner a sweet card for no reason at all.
  84. Recreate your first date, run-in, kiss, etc.
  85. If you’re crafty, make them something. It doesn’t have to be useful, but make sure it’s adorable and reminds them of you.
  86. Tell them you’re lucky to have them. Tell them how you’ve changed since you met them.
  87. Be truthful. Let them know about the naughty mistakes you’ve made.
  88. Be gentle about pointing out your partner’s flaws. They may need to hear it, but always softly.
  89. Show your partner how you trust them. Don’t feel the need to know their whereabouts if they don’t open up first.
  90. Buy your partner a gift certificate for their favorite store.
  91. Never blame your bad mood on your partner.
  92. Write them a story about your love.
  93. Make a picture collage of the two of you.
  94. Do something silly together.
  95. Invite their family to dinner (if they’re on good terms, that is).
  96. Make a playlist of your favorite songs as a couple and play it on a road trip.
  97. Rent some cheesy romance movies.
  98. Ask your partner to share their dreams with you.
  99. Laugh when they joke, even if the joke isn’t funny.
  100. Make it easy for them to love you. You’ll find that they’ll act in kind.

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Last Updated on July 13, 2020

9 Simple Ways to Always Stay Positive

9 Simple Ways to Always Stay Positive

It’s common to be struck with a bout of pessimism, or to naturally be more towards the pessimistic end of the perspective spectrum. It’s hard to see the positives in life and become an optimist when you’re lost in the murky waters of negative thinking.

However, Henrik Edberg, the founder of The Positivity Blog is here to share nine ways we can create a more optimistic outlook and positive perspective:

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” — Maria Robinson

When I was younger — in my teens and early 20s — I was trapped. Not physically, but mentally: by the destructive thought pattern called pessimism. This negative thinking poisoned what might have been a pretty good and opportunity-filled childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood. This pessimism created ceilings and walls where there really were none.

Throughout the period when I was ridden by pessimism, my life and I mostly stood still. Looking back, it was a terrible waste. If you are in pessimistic place, you don’t have to stay there for the rest of your life. I didn’t, for I learned to replace my negative thinking with optimism.

In this article I’ll explore nine positivity habits that have helped me to go from someone who was pessimistic most of the time to someone who is now optimistic almost all the time. I recommend to not try to add all the habits at one go but to choose one habit and to practice it for 30 days so it becomes a habit, before adding the next.

1. Ask Yourself the Right Questions

This is the simplest but perhaps also the most important habit I have discovered in adopting an optimistic mindset. The questions we ask ourselves day in and day out when we wind up in negative, difficult or uncertain situations make all the difference in our life.

A pessimist might ask him/herself questions like:

  • “Why did this happen to me?”
  • “Why do bad things happen to me all the time?”

But an optimist asks him/herself the questions that open up the mind to new viewpoints and possibilities. A few of my favorite questions for finding the optimistic perspective are:

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  • “What is one good thing about this situation?”
  • “What can I learn from this situation?”
  • “What is one small step I can take today to start solving this situation?”

2. Create a Positive Environment to Live In

The people you spend your time with and the information you let influence your mind will have a huge effect on your attitude and how you think about things.

Watch this YouTube video and learn the power of a positive environment:

So choose to:

  • Spend more time with the people who lift you up. And less time – or no time – with people who just bring you down by being negative and critical. Read: You are the Average of the 5 People You Spend the Most Time With
  • Let in the information that supports you. Spend less time on negative and self-esteem damaging media sources and spend more time reading positive and constructive blogs and books, watching motivating movies, listening to inspirational songs, and listening to audio books and podcasts created by optimistic people. Check out 12 Inspirational Movies With Important Life Lessons To Learn and 25 Most Inspirational Songs of All Time.

3. Be Grateful for What You Have (Don’t Forget About Yourself Too)

A very simple and quick way to boost the positive energy in your life is to tap into gratitude.

I usually do it by asking one or more of these questions:

  1. What can I be grateful for in my life today?
  2. Who are 3 people that I can be grateful to have in my life and why?
  3. What are 3 things I can be grateful for about myself?

Just spend 60 seconds or a few minutes during your day with answering one of these questions to reap the wonderful benefits.

4. Don’t Forget About Your Physical Self

Being an optimist isn’t just about thinking in a different way. It is also about caring for the physical part of ourselves.

I have found that working out a couple of times a week, enough quality sleep each night and eating healthy food has a huge effect on my mindset.

If I mismanage those very basic things then negative thoughts pop up far more often and I become more pessimistic and shut down about the possibilities in my life.

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So don’t neglect these basic fundamentals. Just caring for your physical self the right way can minimize a whole bunch of problems in life.

5. Start Your Day in an Optimistic Way

The way you start your morning can set the tone for the rest of your day. For example, a stress-free morning often leads to less stress during the rest of the day.

So how can you set an optimistic tone for your day?

A three-step combination that has worked very well for me is to ask myself a gratitude question during breakfast, read some positive information online or in a book very early in the morning and then follow that up with exercising.

This sets my mind on the right path and fills me up with energy for my day.

6. Focus on Solutions

A sure way to feel more negative about a situation is to sit around and do nothing about it. Instead, use the questions I shared in step one and open up your mind to the possibilities of the situation you are in.

If you have trouble to get started with taking action, ask yourself:

What is one small step I can take today to get the ball rolling?

Then take that small step forward. However small this step is, it can have a big effect in your mood and thoughts. If the step feels too big or it just makes you procrastinate, then ask yourself:

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What is an even smaller step I can take to move forward today?

The most important thing is to move forward, even if it’s a tiny baby step.

7. Reduce Your Worries

The worrying habit is a powerful and destructive one and can take over anyone’s thinking. It used to be one of my biggest obstacles to optimism and to moving forward in life.

Two effective steps that have helped me and still help me to this day to minimize the worries are:

  1. Ask yourself: how many of my worries ever happened in reality? If you are like me you will find that the answer is: very few. Most of the things you fear throughout your life will never happen. They are just nightmares or monsters in your own mind. This question can help you to do a reality check, to calm down and to realize that you have most likely just been building another imaginary nightmare.
  2. Focus on solutions and the action you can take. The worries grow stronger in a foggy mind and an inactive body. So use the questions in Steps 1 and 6 to move out of your worries and into resolution.

8. Don’t Let Ideals Ruin Things

A common mistake people make when making a shift in their attitudes is that they think that they have be perfect and do things perfectly all the time. This traps them from being positive.

Changing to a positive attitude can be gradual. While you may slip and stumble, continuing this way over time will strengthen your positive viewpoint more and more.

But if you set an inhuman standard for yourself and think you have to go from being a pessimist to always being an optimist, then you may find it hard to live up to that. And so you may feel like a failure. You get angry with yourself. And you may even give up on changing this habit and fall back into negative thinking.

So instead, focus on gradual change. If you are optimistic 40% of the time right now, try to improve this to being optimistic 60% of the time. Then, increase that to 80% when you are used to the new standard, then subsequently 100% if you can.

This focus on gradual improvement is far more sustainable and likely to bring long-term success than trying to reach an inhuman standard grounded in perfection.

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9. Finally, a Reminder to Help You to Not Give Up

I would like to end this article with a simple but powerful and timeless thought that comforted and encouraged me to continue on when things looked bleak.

That thought is: It is always darkest before the dawn.

This thought has helped me to hold on and keep going when my social skills and dating life was just plain bad. It has helped me to continue on in my online business when things looked like they would never pick up. It has helped me to put one foot over another even when things looked dark.

I have found this thought to be very true. Why? Because when things seemed to be at the lowest for my blog, business, dating life or life in general, something positive would always happened. That’s probably because being at a low point forced me to change how I did things.

But maybe also because life has a way of evening itself out when I go on. By taking action rather than give up, something good will always happens.

Seeing this thought live itself out has strengthened my belief in staying optimistic, in taking action and to keep going even when going through rough patches.

Re-syndicated 9 Simple Habits to Stay Positive in Life | Personal Excellence

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Featured photo credit: Allie Smith via unsplash.com

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