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Want To Live A More Fulfilling Life? You Need To Understand This Concept First

Want To Live A More Fulfilling Life? You Need To Understand This Concept First

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw

If you’ve ever asked someone for advice about life, chances are you were told, “Just be yourself,” “Do what you love and the money will follow,” or the classic phrase by Joseph Campbell, “Follow your bliss”.  So you rack your brain trying to find the bliss. You’re good at Instagram captions, Facebook comments, buying lots of books and never reading them.

The truth is, you want nothing more than to be successful and live a wonderful life. You want to be a #forceofone. You want to be a #successgenius. You want to be someone you’re proud of. You’ve accomplished things. Difficult things and challenging things. You understand gratitude. You want to be thankful for what you have and still dream bigger. You know you’re a hard worker. You love hard work. You’re so sick and tired that you’re willing to go through anything to get you out of this place. You simply could not have been put on this earth to suffer this mediocrity. There’s got to be more.

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To some people who have achieved many things in their life, have a feeling of dissatisfaction is worse. Some feel like they’ve been living a lie: that who they appear to be on the outside doesn’t quite match who they are on the inside. After all of the work it takes to get anywhere in this world, it’s quite a shock to realize that you haven’t accomplished anything in life that really matters to you. It’s like climbing the ladder of success until you reach the top to find out the ladder is leaning against the wrong wall.

Time For Reinvention

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.” – Albert Einstein

When you’re struggling with finding fulfillment, you may need to make some changes. Change means reinvention. To create something new. This is a concept you may struggle with because you might believe you were created with certain characteristics that determine who you are and what you will become. Nothing is further from the truth. You’re capable of creating anything you desire and you’re intelligent enough to know this. So stop letting other people define who you are. Don’t allow your past accomplishments define what you can and cannot do.

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Treat reinvention as a call to action. Getting to choose how you will shape your interests and desires and what work you will put into becoming the person you desire. I won’t lie to you. This is not easy. Change is not easy. You need to be willing to devote the time and energy to clear away those thoughts that limit you and instead focus on your desires. And then commit to doing anything and everything to move yourself in the right direction.

A Recipe for Bliss

“To live in infinite bliss, practice mindfulness and live in the moment.” – Debasisch Mridha

Living in the moment means not to dwell on the past. Remember, your past does not define you so don’t let it. Always be mindful of your thoughts because they can betray you. You can find some advice about that here. Let’s focus on some steps you can take today that will help you on your journey to reinvention.

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1. Create a vision of your desired future.

Visualization is a very powerful method for manifesting. If you imagine yourself already living the life you desire or having the things you desire, chances are very high you will attain it.

Find a quiet place, sit down and close your eyes. Imagine the future you want. Live it. See yourself going through the motions, actually moving through it. Allow yourself to experience the feelings and emotions. Visualize the sun light of the sun glowing on your face.

Stand up and express your gratitude appreciation for everything in the past. Now imagine yourself walking away from the past and toward your future.

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2. Use visual reminders of your desired future.

Use anything that reminds you of what you’re moving toward. It can be pictures or written affirmations. Place them where you can see them every day.

3. Take the vision of your future and break it into workable tasks.

This is where to rubber hits the road. This where you commit. Make a list of everything you need to do and be specific. Work on accomplishing the tasks on your list every day. Here is a blueprint for long term success to help you.

4. Every day, visualize your desired future.

Take time either first thing in the morning or at bedtime to visualize the future you created in step 1. This will reinforce your stated desire and give you confidence to keep moving  forward. Make this a daily occurrence and eventually it will become a habit.

Living a more fulfilling life takes responsibility and courage to look at yourself in the mirror and be brutally honest about what really matters to you. To understand that you have the ability to recreate yourself and you get to choose what you want your life to be: to be the architect of a new life of fulfillment on your terms. Make that choice and accept the challenge.

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Anthony Pica

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on October 17, 2019

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

How to Spend More Quality Time with Your Partner

You see your partner every single day. They are the first person you talk to in the morning and the last person you kiss goodnight.

But does seeing each other day in and day out equal a healthy relationship? Not necessarily.

Spending quality time with your partner is the best way to ensure your relationship stays healthy and strong. This means going above and beyond sitting together while you watch Netflix or going out for the occasional dinner. You deserve more from your relationship – and so does your spouse!

What does quality time mean? It means spending time with your spouse without interruption. It’s a chance for you to come together and talk. Communication will build emotional intimacy and trust.

Quality time is also about expressing love in a physical way. Not sex, necessarily (but that’s great, too!) but through hand-holding, cuddling, caressing, and tickling. Studies show that these displays of affection will boost partner satisfaction.[1]

So how do you spend quality time with your partner? Here are 13 relationship tips on making the most out of your time with your partner.

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1. Recognize the Signs

If you want a healthy relationship, you have to learn how to recognize the signs that you need to spend more quality time together.

Some telltale signs include:

  • You’re always on your phones.
  • You value friendships or hobbies over quality time with your spouse.
  • You aren’t together during important events.
  • You are arguing more often or lack connection.
  • You don’t make plans or date nights.
  • You’re not happy.

If you are experiencing any of these relationship symptoms, know that quality time together can reverse the negative effects of the signs above.

2. Try New Things Together

Have you ever wanted to learn how to play an instrument or speak another language? How about skydive or ballroom dance?

Instead of viewing these as solo hobbies and interests, why not involve your partner?

Trying new activities together builds healthy relationships because it encourages spouses to rely on one another for emotional and physical support.

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Shared hobbies also promote marital friendship, and the Journal of Happiness Studies found that marital satisfaction was twice as high for couples who viewed each other as best friends.[2]

3. Schedule in Tech-Free Time

Your phone is a great way to listen to music, watch videos, and keep up-to-date with friends and family. But is your phone good for your relationship?

Many couples phone snub, or ‘phub’, one another. Studies show that phubbing can lower relationship satisfaction and increase one’s chances of depression.[3]

Reduce those chances by removing distractions when spending quality time together and showing your partner they have your full attention.

4. Hit the Gym as a Couple

One way you can spend more time together as a couple is by becoming workout partners. Studies show that couples are more likely to stay with their exercise routine if they work out together.[4] Couples also work out harder than they would solo. One study found that 95 percent of couples who work out together maintained weight loss compares to the 66 percent of singles who did.[5]

Join a gym, do at-home couples’ workouts, try couples yoga, hit the hiking trails, or get your bikes out. No matter which way you choose to exercise, these healthy activities can promote a healthy relationship.

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5. Cook Meals Together

Pop open a bottle of wine or put some romantic music on while you get busy – in the kitchen, of course!

One of the best relationship tips for spending quality time together when you both have busy schedules is to cook meals together.[6]

Spice things up and try and prepare a four-course meal or a fancy French dish together. Not only is this a fun way to spend your time together, but it also promotes teamwork.

If all goes well, you’ll have a romantic date night meal at home that you prepared with your four hands. And if the food didn’t turn out the way you’d hoped, you are guaranteed to have a laugh and create new memories together.

6. Have a Regular Date Night

Couples experience a greater sense of happiness and less stress when they are spending quality time together.[7] One of the biggest relationship tips for a healthy partnership is to include a date night in your weekly routine.

The National Marriage Project found that having a weekly date night can make your relationship seem more exciting and helps prevent relationship boredom.[8] It also lowers the probability of divorce, improves your sex life, and increases healthy communication.

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Some great ideas for what to do on your date night include:

  • Have a movie marathon – Gather up your favorite flicks and cuddle up on the couch.
  • Play games together – Cards, board games, video games, and other creative outlets are a fun way to spend quality time together.
  • Recreate your first date – Go back to that restaurant and order the same meal you did when you first got together. You can spice up your evening by pretending you’re strangers meeting for the first time and see how sexy the night gets.
  • Plan a weekend getaway – There’s nothing better than traveling with the one you love.
  • Dinner and a movie – A classic!
  • Try a new restaurant – Make it your mission to rate and try all of the Mexican restaurants/Irish pubs/Italian trattorias in your area.
  • Have a long sex session – Intimacy promotes the release of the oxytocin hormone which is responsible for a myriad of great feelings.[9]

Here’re even more date night ideas for your reference: 50 Unique and Really Fun Date Ideas for Couples

Final Thoughts

The benefits of spending quality time together are endless. Here are just some of the ways it can contribute to a healthy relationship:

  • Improves emotional and physical intimacy
  • Lowers divorce rates
  • Improves communication
  • Reduces marital boredom
  • Bonds couples closer
  • Improves friendship
  • Boosts health
  • Reduces stress

These are all excellent reasons to start making date night a regular part of your week.

It’s easy to have a healthy relationship when you set aside dedicated time to share with your spouse. Try new things together, make your spouse your workout buddy, and look for innovative ways to be close and connected.

These relationship tips will bring great benefits to your marriage.

Featured photo credit: Allen Taylor via unsplash.com

Reference

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