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How To Expose Cheaters by Recovering Deleted Text Messages

How To Expose Cheaters by Recovering Deleted Text Messages

Most relationships don’t last. It’s sad, yes – but true nonetheless; with roughly 85% of all relationships coming to an end. With over a third of relationships starting online, it’s becoming easier than ever to find a replacement beau.

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    To make matters worse, roughly 20% of people in relationships have admitted to cheating on their significant other; most of the time with someone from work.

    Even with all of the advances in technology and ways to communicate with others, it seems that the dating world is more difficult and strenuous than ever before. Which brings us to the topic of this article: how to leverage technology to catch cheating red handed.

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    Before we get into how to find your smoking gun – first a bit of background. My curiosity on this topic was piqued by a recent conversation with a friend over drinks. She explained to me the peace of mind she’s gained after using a simple desktop app to recover text messages her (now) ex had deleted off his phone.

    She was able to end her relationship on her own terms, and prevent the typical heartbreak and damage to her emotional well being that tends to come from being in a cheating relationship.

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      To clarify my friend is not technically savvy. She doesn’t work for a cybersecurity firm and is perhaps the furthest thing from a hacker. She has never needed to be tech savvy, as she is a therapist, so she was always more concerned with building and fostering personal connections with people.

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      So to hear her tell her story about her past relationship was revealing to me about how dedicated you must be to yourself in order to claim the happiness you deserve from a dysfunctional relationship. I asked her some questions on her relationship to see what helped her get through it.

      Were you in a happy relationship before?

      Like most stories about cheating, she was going through some difficult times, as her ex was working and going to school at night – so he was seemingly never around. This made it pretty normal for them to go several days in a row without really spending much time together. It was far from a perfect relationship, but they liked spending time with each other and hence tried to make it work.

      What made you suspect cheating?

      Most of the time, I think people have a gut feeling they’re being cheated on.

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        It might be the time you spend apart – making you feel emotionally distant, or sometimes the signs are more evident.

        To me, most people get surprised by a cheater because they don’t want to believe it. But apparently, after a few months she had her suspicions… and decided to do whatever she could to find out.

        How did you find out and how did you react?

        She did a bit of searching, and found a service that let her recover deleted text messages, and while she knew this was an invasion of privacy, she felt the need to take back her confidence. She was trapped in a daily state of paranoia and anxiety, and if anyone has ever been in that situation, they know that you start doubting everything about your life. So, she decided that either way, she would let him know what she did and deal with the repercussions. However, she needed to reclaim her relationship with herself.

        Reclaiming her relationship with herself?

        She was miserable from day to day, wondering why her boyfriend was gone, where he was, who he was with, why he didn’t want to spend time with her. The questions kept racing through her head, so her own personal relationships and her self-esteem were at an all time low.

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        While finding out he was cheating was tough to handle, it also allowed her the opportunity to completely accept the situation, make up her mind about what she wanted, and move on. They didn’t have an explosive argument either, they just talked and she let him know that if he wasn’t happy with her, then they should go their separate ways. He did hurt her, but she made the decision to take care of herself and improve who she was.

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          Anything you would do differently looking back on it?

          She simply stated that she would have committed more energy to herself as opposed to a broken relationship. You need to invest in a relationship, but how can you expect to be in a healthy relationship when you are not in a good place mentally and emotionally.

          Featured photo credit: Broadly by Vice via broadly.vice.com

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          Last Updated on September 17, 2019

          10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

          10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

          Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

          But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

          Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

          1. Spend Time with Positive People

          If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

          Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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          2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

          When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

          Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

          3. Contribute to the Community

          One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

          Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

          4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

          Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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          Some recommendations for you:

          5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

          You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

          If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

          There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

          6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

          It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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          Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

          7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

          Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

          For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

          Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

          8. Offer Compliments to Others

          Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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          9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

          If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

          Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

          10. Practice Self-Care

          Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

          Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

          Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

          More About Staying Positive

          Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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