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5 Ways to Raise Your Vibration and Manifest What You Want

5 Ways to Raise Your Vibration and Manifest What You Want

Everything in the Universe is made up of energy. From our thoughts and feelings to the food we eat, everything vibrates at its own frequency. Joy, happiness, and love all fall on the higher end of the vibrational scale and since most of us want more of those things, we have to raise our vibration to match.

Here are 5 ways to raise your vibration so you can attract more of what you want.

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1. Write Out Your Ideal Day

This is a great starting point because it not only helps you get clear on what you want to manifest, it also allows you to feel the emotions that the experience will bring you. Let’s say you want to attract a new romantic relationship. Imagine you and your ideal partner spending the day together. Now grab your journal and start writing out the details of that day. What are the two of you doing together, what are you wearing, how are you feeling? Visualize the two of you holding hands or going on date and capture as much detail as you can as you write it out. By doing this you’re basically writing the script for your life. While you don’t need to know who the exact person is you’re attracting (it’s best to leave this open to the Universe), you are getting clear on how you want to feel and what you want that experience to be like for you.

2. Create Empowering Affirmations That Support Your Ideal Vision

Now that you know what you want, create affirmations or mantras that you can repeat to yourself that support your desired outcome. This is going to train your mind to seek out opportunities that will bring you the experience you want. Also, what we focus on expands, so the more positive our thoughts are, the easier it will be to attract more positive experiences. Using our example of attracting a new relationship, you might want to use affirmations like “I am worthy to receive love, I am ready for my new partner to appear, or I radiate love and attract love every day”. Write these affirmations out daily in your journal or put them on post-it notes around your house as reminders.

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3. Make a Vision Board

Vision boards (or dream boards) are great because they help us see what’s possible for us. A vision board is a collage of pictures and/or quotes that give you a visual representation of what you want. Having pictures of what you’re manifesting will raise your vibration because when you look at it, you’re putting your mind in the state where it already has those things. To attract a new partner, you can use images of places you’d like travel together, pictures of happy couples, or quotes about love. You can easily create one online by collecting images and putting them together in a collage, or you can print out images or find them in magazines and glue them onto a larger piece of cardboard to keep in your home.

4. Practice Gratitude

Being grateful for what you already have is a sure-fire way to attract more good things into your life. Take a few minutes each day to focus on the people, things and experiences you’re grateful for and write them out in your journal. This might be a list of 10, 50 or even 100 things. The key is to get into the mindset of gratitude because it’s that feeling that will signal to the Universe that you want more of the same. When you’re attracting a new relationship, you can write out what you’ll be grateful for once that person shows up, but make sure to write it in the present tense. For example, “I am so happy and grateful for the delicious dinner my wife and I just had at our favourite restaurant”.

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5. Laugh and Have Fun

This might seem obvious, but being happy is one of the easiest ways to raise your vibration. When we’re laughing, playing and having fun we’re in the present moment and not thinking about what we don’t have. We can even trick ourselves into being happy by smiling and changing our physiology, or by watching silly cat videos online. Being in a place of joy will also make you a magnet for more joy to be attracted to you – people love to be around happy people because it makes them feel better. Going back to our example of attracting a romantic partner, a great thing to do is to simply smile at people and be kind. Say hello to people, wish the guy at the coffee shop a good day, or hold the door open for someone. All of these simple things can spark a conversation that might lead you towards the relationship you’re seeking.

Attracting what you want in life involves aligning your thoughts beliefs and energy with your desired outcome. Applying these 5 tips to help you raise your vibration will help you manifest what you want by training your subconscious mind to seek out opportunities and will signal to the Universe that you’re open to receiving the experiences you want.

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More by this author

Kelly Dawn

Mystic Biz Coach

Online Visibility Tips for Introverted Entrepreneurs 5 Ways to Raise Your Vibration and Manifest What You Want

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Published on April 7, 2021

6 Signs Of A Controlling Person To Be Aware Of

6 Signs Of A Controlling Person To Be Aware Of

Some of the most manipulative people are so good at what they do that their words and actions can convince you into thinking they truly care about what’s best for you when in reality, it’s quite the opposite. The most common signs of a controlling person are rarely obvious to outside observers. And for someone enmeshed in a controlling relationship or friendship, it can be incredibly challenging to stay away from this toxic person, even if you’re aware of their emotionally abusive tendencies.

While it’s ultimately up to you to decide whether to preserve or leave a lopsided, unfulfilling relationship, it’s nevertheless critical to understand the following six signs of controlling people so you can better advocate for yourself and mitigate the influence of their manipulative tendencies in your own life.

1. They Push Their Own Personal Agenda

Do you know someone who always tries to micromanage the words, behaviors, and attitudes of people around them? Does this person act like they have the right to know anything they want about you, including your location, what you’re doing in a given moment, who you’re talking to online, or any other private information about you? And when planning events and special occasions, does this person dominate conversations, steer plans in their own preferred directions, disparage others’ suggestions, and refuse to collaborate with anyone who might disagree with them?

If you answered “yes” to some of the above questions, then those are clear signs of a controlling person whom you absolutely need to be cautious around. Controlling people are reluctant to even consider alternative ideas, let alone enthusiastically work with people who have differing views. They prefer to be the captain of every ship—regardless of how much or how little an issue personally impacts them—and they have an arsenal of manipulative tactics to deploy if someone stands in the way of them achieving their own personal agendas.

In long-term relationships with controlling people, you may feel constantly pressured to meet their demands, follow their schedule, and focus on whatever they feel is most important. It’s not an exaggeration to say that these people act like the universe revolves around them, which can be exhausting to deal with for their family members, friends, and colleagues.

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2. They Make Everything Transactional

Controlling people aren’t always self-centered, but they’re not too empathetic either. Empathy for them tends to appear in the form of strategic concessions they use as a means to get what they want. They typically view interpersonal relationships as transactional opportunities to extract more value from people surrounding them, which can have a draining effect on those they interact with.

For example, one sign of a controlling person may be their insistence on “keeping score.” This can involve doing nice things for you with the ulterior motive of demanding something from you at a later date in exchange for what you thought was just an act of kindness or a friendly support.

Perhaps they shower you in praise (also known as “love-bombing”) or gifts then blow up at you if you don’t intuitively know they’re expecting something back from you. None of us are mind-readers, but controlling people behave as though everyone else should think and act like they want others to and those who fall out of line are punished for failing to meet their impossible expectations.

A controlling person may also threaten to withhold support if you don’t adhere to their demands, but they do so in such subtle ways that the guilt they impose blinds you from the unreasonable nature of their behaviors.

Some statements to be wary of include:

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  • “I did ___________ for you. What do you mean you can’t do ___________ for me?”
  • “Remember how I helped you with ___________? That took a lot of time and energy from me, but I guess you didn’t appreciate my help.”
  • “I always give you ___________. Don’t you care about my needs too?”
  • “You’re so selfish!” or “You don’t care about me at all!” (gaslighting if you respond with hesitation or politely decline their request for help for perfectly valid reasons, such as not having enough time or resources to assist them)

3. They Criticize Everything

One of the most common telltale signs of a controlling person is their capacity to criticize anything and everything, even small things that seemingly don’t matter. As with many toxic traits in relationships, these problems typically start out so small that you may not even notice. At first, you may even agree with their criticism or at least be able to understand their perspective when they bring up an issue.

However, the criticism tends to get more intense, more constant, and more perplexing for people who maintain relationships with controlling people. You’ll likely notice how they rarely seem to criticize something they do. It’s almost always other-oriented and these types of people are so manipulative that any rationale they offer can seem plausibly legitimate.

Some warning signs of a controlling person who’s overly critical to the point of abusiveness include:

  • Criticizing things about you that you have little to no control over (e.g., appearance, disability, family)
  • Criticizing your personal choices and interests, such as educational pursuits, career, clothing, favorite music, time spent on your hobbies, etc.
  • Punishing you for expressing vulnerability by invalidating thoughts and feelings you share with them
  • Attacking you whenever you express an opinion counter to theirs

4. They Balk When Someone Criticizes Them

We all know the adage, “what goes around, comes around.” But this statement doesn’t apply as much to toxic, controlling people. They’d much prefer to dish out criticism without ever having to take it in return.

For instance, if your friend constantly talks about your appearance with little regard for your emotions but flips out if you make just a single comment about their appearance, there’s a possibility that they could have some hidden controlling tendencies left unchecked. Remember, these people aren’t just controlling in their behaviors towards others. They’re also actively trying to stay in complete control over every aspect of their lives, which includes how others view them.

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This seemingly insatiable desire for control can prompt them to lash out against even the smallest bits of criticism, leaving people around them too weary or scared to speak up again in the future. While it’s possible they may suffer from something called rejection sensitivity dysphoria, this does not excuse them from the consequences of their words and actions. They should seek professional help to better manage their reactions to criticism.

5. They Socially Isolate You

Not all controlling people do this, but for manipulative narcissists, socially isolating victims is a go-to strategy for maintaining control because it’s effective at preventing people from truly understanding how toxic their partner, family member, or friend is treating them. Think of it this way—if you don’t talk to many other people in your life, there’s less of a risk that you’ll damage their reputation by revealing their abusive tendencies.

Socially isolating others also gives the person more control over you and your life as it becomes more difficult to break away from them if you don’t have other healthier channels of communication and interpersonal support to turn to.

This process doesn’t happen overnight, nor is it something you can readily recognize as abusive. At first, it may seem reasonable, such as asking you to stop engaging so often with family members with whom both of you disagree on major social or political issues. As the social isolation progresses, they may suggest cutting people out of your life—especially if they don’t like that person, regardless of how you personally feel—or even conjure up high-stakes problems like “it’s me or them” under the guise of saving you from people in your life whom they don’t like for whatever reason.

In a controlling person’s life narrative, they’re always the protagonist who’s incapable of any wrongdoing. The blame is always redirected at someone else, whether that’s you or other people in your life. The more they isolate you from other supportive people in your life, the more susceptible you’ll be to falsely believing that they’re right and you “don’t need” your other friends and family when you have someone as perfect as this person.

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6. They’re Emotionally Abusive

It’s hard enough to be in control of your own emotions but when someone else is constantly belittling you and your interests or leveraging guilt and shame to manipulate you into saying or doing what they want, this can make it even more challenging to stay in control of your own life and emotional well-being.

Emotional abuse is another sign of a controlling person that is often overlooked in relationships. After all, human personalities vary widely in terms of passivity, and it’s not uncommon for one person in a relationship to be significantly more passive than the other. This becomes an issue when the controlling partner or friend exudes signs of emotional abuse, which can start subtly and become much more pronounced over time.

Concerning signs of emotionally abusive language or behavior to watch out for include:

  • Dismissing your needs and/or belittling your interests in counterproductive ways
  • Privately or publicly shaming or humiliating you
  • Making you feel as though you can never live up to their expectations or do anything right (according to their own vague, subjective standards)
  • Gaslighting you into thinking they said or did something that never actually happened (making you question your own reality)

Final Thoughts

It’s sometimes hard to see the negative things about someone with whom we have a relationship. We may sometimes unconsciously overlook the signs of a controlling person, especially if that person is someone we have known for a long time or are close to us. However, cutting them off your life is the best thing you can do for yourself. Just watch out for these six signs of a controlling person and take immediate action when you spot them.

More Tips on How To Deal With a Controlling Person

Featured photo credit: Külli Kittus via unsplash.com

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