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Communication, Motivation

To Love Oneself is The Beginning of A Lifelong Romance

Written by Jay Hill
Jay writes about communication and happiness on Lifehack.
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Change is the only constant.

In life, the situations in which we find ourselves and the relationships we enter into are always time-limited. Whether these relationships last for a few weeks or a few decades, we are always aware that those we love could be taken from us at any moment. Bereavements, breakups, and unforeseen circumstances can all conspire to change our lives in the course of a mere few seconds.

In this respect, everyone in our lives is like a passenger on board a train. Everyone gets off the train sooner or later, and the sooner we accept this truth, the more readily we can adjust our outlook on life in such a way that increases our chances of self-acceptance and inner peace. When we truly embrace impermanence, we are also more likely to learn from past experiences and carry these lessons forward to lead a more peaceful life filled with healthy relationships.

The danger of relying on others for love and validation.

When you depend on other people for love and approval, you set yourself up for a fall because all relationships end eventually. Those who love themselves know that whilst happy relationships with others are a great joy in life and can be tremendously enriching, the only person upon whom one can depend to provide love and support is yourself. Otherwise, you risk personal devastation every time a friend, relative, or romantic partner rejects you or threatens the existence of your relationship.

In extreme cases, people who depend on other people for approval and affection bend and twist themselves out of all recognition; trying to please everyone and seek for attention. This can lead to poor self-esteem and a greatly diminished sense of self-respect. In contrast, when you love and respect yourself for who you are, you are free to live a more authentic life in keeping with your true nature. You learn to balance striking compromises, remaining flexible, and staying in touch with who you are.

Courting, befriending and loving yourself.

As those who show themselves love and care know, self-love is the only kind of love upon which you can depend. When you take the time to know yourself, a lifelong romance can begin. Only when you become accustomed to spending time by yourself can you gain a true appreciation of your needs, wants, and desires.

This, in turn, helps you imagine and ultimately build the kind of life you need. Spending time engaging in your favorite activities, taking yourself on trips and expeditions, and staying as healthy as possible are all steps that will increase your self-appreciation, acceptance, and self-love.

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Never feel lonely again.

When you truly love and appreciate yourself, you will never feel lonely again. You will always have your own self-reliance and self-approval to see you through life’s challenges. When you come up against adversity, you will always be able to look to yourself, and your inner resources to help you move past the barriers that lie in your way.

People who fully understand the importance of self-love enjoy connecting with other people, but they never make the mistake of depending on them to prop up their sense of self or to provide them with a purpose in life. Those who are secure in their identities and believe themselves to be just as valuable as any other human being never feel the need to seek out validation as they carve out their own paths in life.

Self-love is an ongoing project that is well worth the effort. When you truly nurture yourself, even times of great stress and hardship seem more bearable.

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